How do u punish a 16 year old???

[babybaillie]

Any ideas? Im at my wits end

 

[kerry2009]

Ground them, stop their money, kick them out lol. Suppose it depends on what you have already tried and what they have done

 

[babybaillie]

can u ground a 16 year old tho?

 

[Dinoslass]

Yes, you can. Well, I can!! I have three teenagers and if they misbehave they will be punished. Either by grounding them, taking away priviledges or making them do something they do not like. All though that last one is only when they have realised they have been wrong and want to try and make up, as it won't work if they are in their contra-mood. But I do think you can ground a 16 year old. They are not adults yet (sorry all you girls who are on here and are mummies already!!!) and as long as they live with us they need to live by our rules. I have a house full and it would be complete chaos without rules!!

 

[siobhan MS]

Hey

i am a teenager, grounding wont make much difference.....my mum tried it all with me-grounding me, taking my mobile, not giving me pocket money....banning me from seeing certain 'friends' that were getting me into trouble. Nothing works, i realise now how i used to behave was wrong but when your going through that stage (that EVERY teen goes through) you wont listen to no one

you might find that punishment may make the behaviour worse

 

[KA92]

Hey

i am a teenager, grounding wont make much difference.....my mum tried it all with me-grounding me, taking my mobile, not giving me pocket money....banning me from seeing certain 'friends' that were getting me into trouble. Nothing works, i realise now how i used to behave was wrong but when your going through that stage (that EVERY teen goes through) you wont listen to no one

you might find that punishment may make the behaviour worse

i second that! HOWEVER, my mum came up with a enw tatic....talking to me, telling me how disapointed she was, made me feel guilty as hell, thats the best sort of punishment

 

[marley2580]

I don't think you can. They're a grown up so you could start treating them like one and asking for rent etc?

 

[siobhan MS]

Hey

i am a teenager, grounding wont make much difference.....my mum tried it all with me-grounding me, taking my mobile, not giving me pocket money....banning me from seeing certain 'friends' that were getting me into trouble. Nothing works, i realise now how i used to behave was wrong but when your going through that stage (that EVERY teen goes through) you wont listen to no one

you might find that punishment may make the behaviour worse

i second that! HOWEVER, my mum came up with a enw tatic....talking to me, telling me how disapointed she was, made me feel guilty as hell, thats the best sort of punishment

i totally agree!......that would be much better than shouting and punishing them!! lol.......i know i'm only 18 just now but i have grown up a lot since i moved out when i was 16....one of the reasons i did move out was my mum!

 

[siobhan MS]

I don't think you can. They're a grown up so you could start treating them like one and asking for rent etc?

Thats a good idea too....if they want to be treated like an adult then they should start acting like one-problem will be getting dig money etc if they dont work-cant ask for money that doesnt exsit

 

[babybaillie]

I don't think you can. They're a grown up so you could start treating them like one and asking for rent etc?

Cant ask for rent when they have no source of income. Technically a grown up, shame they dont behave like it.

 

[marley2580]

What are they doing? still at school? signing on? What about telling them to get a saturday job? they must have some source of income, even if it's from you, tell them you'll be deducting room and board from what they get. These are just some thoughts, I don't have teenagers so I'm no expert

 

[babybaillie]

still at school. gets money as and when he needs it. so stopping money isnt going to help. dont think suggesting a saturday job is really a solution. thanks anyway

 

[Christine1993]

Im sixteen and nothing really makes much of a difference IMO. I don't actually remember the last time I was 'grounded' either lol. Try speaking to them other than that i dont know what you could do x

 

[Dinoslass]

I agree that talking is the first thing. And I must say my children are not that far gone that nothing works. They accept that doing wrong gets them a punishment. I think if someone is that far gone that nothing works they are better off moving out. There needs to be a reasonable amount of talking in your family I suppose!!!

 

[babybaillie]

Thats the problem tho, the bad behaviour is in school, not at home. At home ive never had any problem. As for asking him to move out, thats never an option. Thats when a 16 year olds problems would begin if he was homeless

 

[sing<3]

Hmm, I can see why it's difficult..
I'm 16 and have always behaved really well in school, and at home apart from the occasional tiff... But if I do something wrong my parents just tend to shout at me and talk to me about it rather than grounding me or anything, and I hate being shouted at enough to not do it again, but I guess you'll have tried that...

Have you tried sitting him down and having a proper, formal chat about his behaviour? Without distractions or anything.. I think that if teenagers get talked to as if they're adults it often helps them see the point - maybe you could ask him what he thinks would make him behave better in school? But obviously not in a patronising way.. Have you tried just being totally honest and calm and explaining the situation? : like school is really important in order to do well in the world of work, and that he'll regret it later if he doesn't do as well as he could...

Good luck, sorry I don't have more suggestions xx

 

[morri]

well my mother certainly was able to ground me.
but mostly through talk and not through any 'last measures' kidn of things.

 

[morri]

Hey

i am a teenager, grounding wont make much difference.....my mum tried it all with me-grounding me, taking my mobile, not giving me pocket money....banning me from seeing certain 'friends' that were getting me into trouble. Nothing works, i realise now how i used to behave was wrong but when your going through that stage (that EVERY teen goes through) you wont listen to no one

you might find that punishment may make the behaviour worse

i second that! HOWEVER, my mum came up with a enw tatic....talking to me, telling me how disapointed she was, made me feel guilty as hell, thats the best sort of punishment

so yea this is it mostly. and see that there are no distractions like radio or so on.

 

[myasmumma]

take away there privilages, like internet access and no money and yes you can ground a 16 yr old i know i was lol, also try talking it out and go the "adult" way about things first if that dont work treat them like the child they are acting lol

 

[nightkd]

Talk to them. Discuss what sort of punishment they think would work - it might sound dumb, but find something you agree on - if they agree to it then it leaves less resentment and you've come to a compromise "You've done this wrong, so what can we agree for you to do to repay that wrong?" kinda thing...

Kicking them out will not work; my mum kicked me out repeatedly and that's a big reason I decided to move to the US - I was living somewhere where I couldn't guarantee I had a home from week to week - not the best environment to be living in and it made me depressed. Mind you, my mum was a bit weird...she kicked me out for dumb reasons; flipped at weird little things....scary sometimes.

x