How do you know when your ready

[catty]

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[TwilightAgain]

Personally I kinda think that if you're questioning whether you're ready then there must be a ready suggesting you're not besides ttc nerves.

Its natural to be nervous I think (I can't speak from experience) but if your concerns are centred around on more than minor nerves then i'd reevaluate whether now was the right time and if that question can't be answered maybe you should wait?

Good luck making your decision

 

[LDC]

I always got told "there is never a right time" but I think that I based our decision on whether I thought that we were in a stable relationship and environment - in regards to housing, us as a couple, jobs and money - and whether I thought that we were ready to be parents.

I think it's natural to have nerves and I think when or if I do conceive I will be scared, but in an excited way, similar to when we got married.

Xx

 

[catty]

Thanks for the replys, i think iv accidently deleted the actual question part somehow.
I do feel ready and we are both in secure jobs and live together. We have been together 2 years and i do feel that maybe in the next year it would feel right to begin trying. The problem is i think people will think we are too young, im 22 almost 23 and bf is 24.
I know this isnt that young but most people i have known that have babys at my age have been surprise babys and i dont know anyone my age actually wanting/trying.
Maybe i need to stop caring so much about what other people think!!

 

[lemongrass]

I'm 23 and my husband and I are trying. No one has told us that we are too young. We are married, own our house and my husband has a fantastic stable job with great benefits. Its true that there is no perfect time but the two of you do have to feel ready. If you are hyperaware of what other people are thinking that could be your inner self trying to send you a message. If you plan to get married, I suggest doing that first. Not only because planning a wedding is stressful but having kids with someone is a lifelong commitment and being married (for me at least) really cemented that commitment and made me feel like I am truly in a place to have kids.

 

[Squiggy]

I always got told "there is never a right time" but I think that I based our decision on whether I thought that we were in a stable relationship and environment - in regards to housing, us as a couple, jobs and money - and whether I thought that we were ready to be parents.

I think it's natural to have nerves and I think when or if I do conceive I will be scared, but in an excited way, similar to when we got married.

Xx

AGREED!!!!!! People tell me that all the time too.
For me, it IS how stable you feel about your life, finances, and relationship at the time. But as for the "never a right time" it's true. Because while I feel my marriage is content and my life is secure, I've been putting off a baby for a few years now because of finances. But I give up! I can't let that ruin my future. The bottom line for me is I want babies, even if I have to struggle at first.

 

[tommyg]

I agree with they'll never be the right time but think the ideal time would be in my late 20's. I wish DH and I met ten years earlier than we did 33/32. I think it would have been great if we'd had 5 years or so together to enjoy each other before our lifes became so focused on LO.

Given we never met until our 30's and wanting a couple of kids and not wanting to have kids in our 40's I kind of feel we rushed more than I would have liked.

Hope that makes sense.

 

[nugget80]

as a pp said there Will never be a perfect time but there Will be a right time...! my mum told me i was mad when we were ttc last time. if she knew we were trying for another she would point out exactly why we shouldn't...! but I'm 31 now and oh Will be 40 soon so its right for us. we don't have any debt or money worries and yes we Will be completely skint for a few years esp when i go back to uni but it Will be so worth it...! neither of us wants to be too much older before we complete our family...

 

[GenYsuperlady]

I'm 28 and I have some people telling us we are still too young, and others who think we should get going (MIL) as soon as possible!
I wanted to be a very young mom but I had big goals for my education which required me to hold off...as a result, I have gotten to do so many cool things with my husband that wouldn't have happened if we'd had kiddos. Not just travel, but concerts, spontaneous date nights, deciding to drink in the middle of the day or lie in until noon, that sort of thing.
It's fun to enjoy being a grown-up kid before you are a grown-up parent!

 

[catty]

Thanks everyone, i am going to be starting a new job in the near future and we have decided to wait.
I would have been totally happy TTC but we realised that we do have enough money for ourselfs but not a great deal left over and i would like to wait until i have savings so we could go on family holidays, not struggle if any accidents were to happen etc etc so i think when im around 25 would be perfect and OH agrees