How often does your oh/dh go out or do hobbies?

[Bevziibubble]

My husband rarely goes out for any hobbies. His main hobbies are TV and games, so he does these in the house. Sometimes he will go to his uncles to watch a football match.

 

[dgirllamius]

My OH doesn't really have any hobbies besides his computer so he's always here unless he's at work.

My hobbies don't involve going out much (unless it's photography but I do that in the daytime) and my indoor hobbies are painting and xbox.

I do think he is being unreasonable though, that is a lot of time to spending on a hobby every week. I know it's easier said than done but have a chat with him and see if you can come to a compromise.

 

[Natasha2605]

My OH has football training on a Thursday night so is typically gone 5-9 (usually straight from work). On a Sunday he usually has a game so is away half 11 till half 4 ish. He also usually goes out one night a week to play Fifa with his friends or have a game of football. I'm used to it, doesn't bother me.

 

[maryp0ppins]

He plays in a sat football league from sept-may, every saturday he has a match.
he sometimes will play 5 aside during the week, and he also goes out with friends to gigs and a few festivals a year.
We don't have any kids but I imagine he will still keep up the sat football when we do, he loves it and it keeps him fit. We usually spend sunday together just us.

 

[Pearls18]

The only thing hubby does regularly is go to the gym, he tends to tag this on to the end of a working day (the gym is at his work which is just over the road from us) but he usually finishes work by 4 when he's not working away so he's home by 5 anyway. When he's off work he will go into the gym or for a run for an hour, it does make me internally grumble lol, but I don't say anything because it's important for his physical and mental health to run, he's miserable if he hasn't run for a few days, and it's important for his work, so I don't mind really. Only time it got on my nerves was when DS2 had just been born, but I think it was because I was jealous he could have an hour to himself

In terms of socialisation my hubby is a hermit, he only goes to "mandatory" work nights of which there have only been 3 in 2 years, one of which is a pirate fancy dress party in a few weeks, can't wait to see him dressed as a grumpy pirate

But no I don't think you're being unreasonable, if he's working long hours and then indulging himself at the expense of his family for 9 hours a week I think that's too much. There is most definitely a compromise there!

 

[Abigailly]

My husband, when he's home, is out the house with work from 8am-6pm. Then Mon and Wed he plays ball 8.30-10pm.

He also goes to the gym probably 3 mornings before work, which isn't an issue as I'm never up by then. And quite often he'll run as he gets home for work. Just for 40 mins or so. But exercise is important to him. He is sitting at a desk all day and if he hasn't exercised in a day or 2 I can tell. He gets crabbit and fidgety. And just generally annoying. So it's in my own interest really.

However it drives me mad when they have a tournament or something coming up. And he's training 4 nights and then playing on a Sat.

Generally we leave the weekends just for family , except a quick spin class for me on a Saturday.

I would be annoyed though if I had 2 kids and a difficult pregnancy and I don't think you're being unreasonable to cut it back.

 

[tinkerbelle93]

Mine does very little outside of work and being at home. He sometimes goes to the pub after work for an hour on a Friday but that's about it. He never goes on nights out, doesn't play sport or anything! It never used to be like this and we're moving soon and I'm encouraging him to join the gym which he seems quite keen on, he really needs some other things to do! I think 9 hours a week is a bit much, especially if you've said you're unhappy with it. I can imagine you wouldn't be allowed to do something for that length of time and leave him with the kids when he's home.

 

[x__amour]

He doesn't. He says he has no interest to.

 

[smallpeanut]

I have horses so I'm gone once a day for anywhere between 1-3 hours. If my oh is at work, the kids come with me. If he is home, he looks after them. My oh never complains. Had my horses long before he came on the scene he restores classic cars so he can be working on cars for a few hours a week.

Doesn't bother me at all. So long as we spend some quality time together as the four of us, and some time the two if us, I'm not fussed. I think it's important to do the things you love. They keep you happy and sane. If it got to the point that neither of us could manage to spend time as a family, we would obviously compromise but we have a good balance.

 

[sparkle_1979]

My husband works away 2 weeks a mth but when hers home maybe once a week... I wouldn't like him going out every night

 

[AP]

I try to chase him out, hes at home with the kids and he lets me do whatever I want. I maybe go out 1-2 nights a week. This is either for my pole classes or family. He'll maybe do once a week, football and such. We make sure we have time together as a family at night.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Mine never goes out lol it winds me up so bad. Fishing when forced!

 

[catty]

You aren't being unreasonable, you should be able to do the same as him and if he is away 5 nights a week the maximum you could is 2 nights (and you probe wouldn't even go out then) so that's really not 50/50

My oh works 8-5,
On a we'd he has football 6 - 9
Football game sat 12- 4
He is also regularly asked to play for 5 a side games if they don't have enough players, I tell him I don't mind every now and then but make it clear I don't want him having another weekly thing that's set in stone.
He also has the gym - pre kids he'd go 3 nights a week, now he goes in the morning or not at all as he doesn't think it's fair on me.
He goes out for his friends b days, head wetting etc but has made it pretty clear he can't go out every sat night like we used to

So I'd say 3 different times a week is probably as much as I'm happy wit, anymore and I start feeling a little neglected and taken the piss off.

I go to see a friend once a week or every 2 weeks, go out for a meal with them around once a month

 

[Natsku]

Me and OH have agreed that we both get two evenings each a week to go out and do our own thing but if its nice weather he'll sometimes go drive his motorbike after work or at the weekend as well but I don't mind - if I really need/want him home with me he'll stay.

 

[Equreuil]

Mine doesn't a lot because we live in a rural area so there's not much to do. He begs to go to the casino once a week though (sometimes more) which I hate because I think it's a waste of money.

Most of the time he might as well be out because once he gets home from work (usually late) he checks out mentally and plays xbox all night and doesn't even try to spend time with me.

 

[Jes.shortcake]

My DH goes out every Thursday for his car meet up group. Usually he'll go out another day or night of the week. But he's not going out to the bar or anything. He's mostly with his car buddies working on cars. If he wants to go out more then that..well it depends what kind of day I'm having with LO. If he's being really good and I don't mind taking care of him by myself longer then he can go out. But if he's been crabby all day and I need a break..then absolutely not.

 

[Bittersweet]

Recently he's been a bit but that's because of end of footie season etc
Monday is darts 5-whenever he's home
Sometimes Thursday is darts too although this has stopped mostly now because if his work.

Last weekend Saturday 11-9 was football watching and Sunday 5-6am for a football thing.

He goes out drinking probably 3/4 times a month

I don't mind really as I like peace and quiet and I get to do my own thing too but I do get pissed when he tells me he doesn't have any money at the end of the month. Not my problem if he spends it on drink .

Your oh hobby sounds excessive especially with Los and a hard pregnancy

 

[d_b]

Usually once a week for sports (only about an hour) and another night for something social (to see his best friend or play poker). Usually he does his sports activities lunch hour at work which is great, is that an option for your OH, OP?