How old is baby when you stop being paranoid??

[stepmum]

At what age are everyone's babies when you stop being so paranoid or is it something that stays with you for a good while?

To explain I am forever checking my little boy is breathing and I'm starting to feel a little neurotic. Every time he is asleep I check on him loads, I stand over him and scrutinise his chest to make sure he is breathing, a lot of the time if he's in his cot and I'm in bed I have the monitors to my ears straining to hear him and convince myself that his breathing is actually random noises I can hear so I have to go and check on him and then I think he senses me and wakes up. Even when he was in our room my heart is in my mouth until I hear a groan or a sheep noise. The poor little thing has even has a few pokes and nudges in his short life

Does this paranoia go or am I lumbered with it for a while?

P.S I leave his bib on him for about an hour once he's had his bottle to catch anything he might want to spit up and I hate laying him on his playmat because he likes to throw his bib over his head and even though I am always in the room I'm terrified he will smother himself by the time I get from the couch to his mat and our living room isn't massive, its so irrational!

 

[Cattia]

With both my children I habe used an Angelcare movement monitor and thqt has been the ony way dor me to get any sleep at all! I know it can't protect them but at least I know they are breathing through the night. With my daughter I relaxed a lot once she hit six months and then again at a year. Ny anxiety with my son is much less severe but I still worry about him a lot. The worry is normal nut if you feel that it is getting in the way of you enjoying your son then talk to your HV about it.

 

[shambaby]

for me, it has got better, but it hasn't gone away. our monitor has a function which makes it go into a kind of 'sleep mode' and only come on when the baby makes a noise above a certain volume. hubby would really like to use it, but i need to hear him breathing. i honestly don't think it will ever truly go away, as it's a mother's instinct to want to protect her child, but as they get older and more able to take care of themselves, i hope it eases a little.

 

[bumpy_j]

I was exactly the same, it was honestly ruining my life because I was so paranoid and I do still get it won't lie. But it's a little better now that I know my baby so well and can trust him more. 4 months is roughly when the SIDS danger period ceases (although it's still possible for an older baby it's extremely rare) so I found it easier to sleep without the breathing monitor on although I am nowhere near ready to sleep in a separate room from him. I do also need to check on him when he's having an extremely long nap but it is a lot easier now just to chill and I'm sure it will be for you soon enough x

 

[Aberrance]

I think I'm going to be paranoid until we're out of the SIDS range... Soo. Around 8 more months for me.. Though, I'm a neurotic person.
I've read that having LO sleep with a pacifier reduces SIDS by up to 50% though! My DD likes to spit hers out once she's in a deep sleep though.. That's how we know she's out, lol.

 

[Seity]

I think it's a personality thing. I think I was paranoid his first night in the bassinet (He slept on my chest the first week). After that night, I was fine.

 

[minties]

I would say you're being pretty paranoid.

 

[jjbump]

I think it's natural to be like this, seeing as we have so many dos and don'ts out there. As others have said, it'll probably ease with time but not properly disappear. ;-)

 

[stepmum]

Minties I don't mean to sound abrupt and I apologise if it sounds that way but I'm unsure how to take your response. I am fully aware that I'm being paranoid and irrational and didn't ask for that to be confirmed, I simply asked if this feeling was normal and if it passes. From the other ladies responses I am reassured that I am not alone in feeling like this Though I know deep down hopefully everything will be ok, my nerves are heightened by the fact that I am an anxious person anyway plus my baby spent the first 16 days of his life in NICU and SCBU i'm thinking that's a factor. My time and enjoyment of him is not affected but it is always in the back of my mind, I think I just needs to relax a bit.

 

[amygwen]

I don't think you're being paranoid at all. In fact I don't know of one mother who wasn't paranoid when their LOs were that young. Your LO is still really young. I can understand why you're paranoid. It went down a lot for me when he reached a year and now it never goes through my head. But at that age, it's soooo normal to worry.

 

[LockandKey]

I think I'm always going to be slightly paranoid about something, if it's not SIDS then it will be something else like her getting to all her milestones, if I'm paying enough attention to her, if she is happy, and when she stars school it will be if she is learning a lot, her grades, if she is making friends.....it never ends