How To Be A Good Mother

[freckleonear]

Anyone else watched it? I've just caught up on 4oD. It was great to see some non-mainstream parenting portrayed in a fairly positive light. I especially loved the home educating mum of 6, she seemed to have everything together and it was great to see a 2 year old breastfeeding on TV. I thought it was really sad though when the presenter asked her children how she could be a better mummy and the older girl said they wanted to see her more often. So what did everyone else think of the programme?

 

[NewMummyx]

very interesting, i have no idea how the mum of 6 does it and shows EC can work too! i ordered a copy of "Continuum Theory", sounds like an interesting read

 

[Lazlay]

I only watched some of it but loved it. It was nice to not just see the typical mainstream parenting ideas. Even though mOst of the ideas I wouldn't actually do myself, I could totally see where they were coming from. Can't wait to watch the rest on 4od

 

[Tanikins]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

EDIT - i had a vag birth but this comment still made me wanna slap her

 

[My_First]

Honestly? I found the title of it annoying on how to be a better mother, i.e. does it make me a better mother if I home school, breastfeed until x and encapsulate my placenta and practise ec. Yes, good alternative views of parenting, and each to their own, do they make you a better mother? No, just a different mother. What I also found interesting, that my OH noticed, was that two of the 'alternative' parents were North American. Does it possibly mean that they are more open minded to these things than us Brits? Who knows, but an interesting observation nonetheless.

 

[little_lady]

Hmm i might have to watch this now!

 

[NewMummyx]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

oh yeah that annoyed me too! Shows how wrong she is, my nephew was an emergency c section and at 7 still follows his mum to the toilet - he is her shadow lol

 

[little_lady]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

haven't seen it, and it sounds like a complete generalization, but it was true for me. The whole emergency section thing really took the focus off bonding with my baby now of course I am as bonded as any mum but for the first week or so it was hard.

 

[Lazlay]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

EDIT - i had a vag birth but this comment still made me wanna slap her

Same. When she said she still couldn't look her own mum in the eye because she had a c section! How ridiculous!

 

[Tanikins]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

haven't seen it, and it sounds like a complete generalization, but it was true for me. The whole emergency section thing really took the focus off bonding with my baby now of course I am as bonded as any mum but for the first week or so it was hard.

The way she said it was you WOULD NEVER be able to have that bond! She said she was a c-sec baby and didnt really a stong bond with her mum

Like c-sec mums dont feel as if they've failed enough

 

[little_lady]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

haven't seen it, and it sounds like a complete generalization, but it was true for me. The whole emergency section thing really took the focus off bonding with my baby now of course I am as bonded as any mum but for the first week or so it was hard.

The way she said it was you WOULD NEVER be able to have that bond! She said she was a c-sec baby and didnt really a stong bond with her mum

Like c-sec mums dont feel as if they've failed enough

Oh ok, in that case I agree! How awful.

 

[lilliesmummie]

I liked it, but hated the title. I know it was peoples opinions on how to be a good mother, better mother. I tried breastfeeding, but it didnt work.. Does that make me less of a good mum as someone who managed to breastfeed for 2years? No. People are critisized all the time, if they do something thats not 'perfect' .. Sometimes bf,eating placentas,home schooling isnt always best! .. Well, its not best for me and im sure its not best for others. I think every choice a mother has on how to be a good mum should never be doubted. Hats off to those who breastfeed for so long, it was so stressful for me! Bit of a rant good prog, OH didnt like it much though lol!

 

[2ndtimeluckyX]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

EDIT - i had a vag birth but this comment still made me wanna slap her

this is when I switched off. I just wanted to punch her! Stupid woman!

My baby was delivered by c-section and I think we have a fantastic bond! I was a c-section baby myself and have a better bond with mum than some of my sisters who were delivered naturally!

Some women are so annoying. They think that their way is the only way!

That other woman that said if u bottle feed, use a pushchair, and put baby in a Moses basket are detaching themselves from their baby also pissed me off!

 

[sequeena]

I laughed at a lot of it. Most of it was very patronising.

 

[Tanikins]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

EDIT - i had a vag birth but this comment still made me wanna slap her

this is when I switched off. I just wanted to punch her! Stupid woman!

My baby was delivered by c-section and I think we have a fantastic bond! I was a c-section baby myself and have a better bond with mum than some of my sisters who were delivered naturally!

Some women are so annoying. They think that their way is the only way!

That other woman that said if u bottle feed, use a pushchair, and put baby in a Moses basket are detaching themselves from their baby also pissed me off!

Yer she was also annoying - fair play to her if shes got the time/ability to carry her child around!! Mine weighs 19lb it would kill me i also bottle feed and use a cot and a pushchair because i clearly dont understand how to be there for my lb

*goes to sit in the 'bad' mummy corner*

 

[Tanikins]

I also dont think they put a huge amount of thought into the name of the show just the name makes you think here goes a liad of strangers telling me how im not being a good mum

 

[mummy2lola]

The title was ridiculous and alot was patronizing and offensive with generalisations.

I knew I was a rubbish mother when I didn't wanna bring my placenta home and fry it up with a nice bottle of chianti xx

 

[freckleonear]

Oh yes, that comment about c-sections was ridiculous. It may sometimes cause a temporary delay in bonding but you really can't blame not being able to look your mother in the eye on that. I also thought the bit about her thinking she is a perfect mother was rather naive, surely every mother needs to reevalute what they are doing from time to time and adjust if necessary. It was nice that they showed all about the benefits of eating your placenta though.

The woman who was talking about detachment came across rather militant, but I understand what she was trying to say. In our modern society we don't keep our babies as close as other cultures do so they don't tend to get as much "kangaroo care". I thought it was fantastic that she offered wet nursing though. There was a facebook campaign to find milk for the little baby she was breastfeeding because her mother was ill in hospital.

 

[summer rain]

Sounds interesting I think I will watch it later. I do think some of the mums would annoy me also; and I am a homeschooling, pro-natural parenting mum (though I am not perfect and have to use disposable nappies as we have at least 10 loads of laundry outstanding no matter what we do!), but I do find the militant attitude of those who follow some parenting styles upsetting, and this includes other extreme parenting styles not just the more 'natural' oriented ones, such as those that follow extremely rigid routines and try to force that onto others. I did once buy this natural parenting magazine and it was really funny but sad at the same time, it basically said cloth diapering is not good enough-only EC is; regular homeschooling is constricting and just as bad as normal school, only radical homeschooling is ok, natural birth at home with gas and air is wrong and drugging your baby (it even frowned on TENs machines-probably because they use batteries), only hypnobirthing is ok; normal dairy products are practically the work of the devil-only raw dairy made by small co-operatives will do, etc etc. Oh and I thought I was good for making my own bread with shop bought yeast, but no according to the magazine that is the work of the devil and would lead to all kinds of digestive problems-only a true sourdough bread is ok to make. It did strike me as ironic that this magazine was being sold in a highly mainstream commercialised corporate supermarket which the writers would probably completely frown upon xx

 

[emzul]

Most of it was fine but i was so annoyed at what the placenta lady said about c-sec mums bond with there baby being less than a vag-birth mum

EDIT - i had a vag birth but this comment still made me wanna slap her

This pissed me off too, I didnt have a C-sec either but know people who have and they have all been for medical reasons, because baby was in distress etc and for her to say that was horrible, she said it like all women who have C sec's do it through choice?!.... bet Channel 4 will be getting some complaint letters about her!

Must be hard enough going through a C sec and hearing Dr's say your LO is in distress and having the panic without someone then going on to say she wont bond with her child!