How to deal with mom-in-law who constantly aggravates?

[tamina800]

I'm nearly 13w pregnant and had a difficult first trimester. My mother in law is visiting us for 4 months (arrived when I was 10 weeks).
Since then, my rage is out of control. Of course, I'm too p$#@@ to really tell her off... so I go into my room and throw some stuff around.
She talks constantly, at the top of her lungs, giggles like a 3 year old in a horror movie, constantly butts into conversations that my husband and I are having (he asks me something, she answers, I ask him something, she answers), does the same when I talk to my son. I only have to start a sentence with him "Here I've made you hot choc.." and she butts in screeching "hot chocolate! hot chocolate! drink drink, c'mon c'mon... hihihihihihih". W. T. F????
I cannot step into the kitchen without her telling me where something random is (who asked???), or constantly asking me to eat things that I tell her at least twice a day I cannot keep down (bread and rice make me throw up each time).
I'm bloody losing my mind. She's gonna be here till Sept.
I know a lot of it is pregnancy hormones, but she is no less aggravating when Im not pregnant as well.
How do I handle this? I've had pain in my stomach after a couple of rage sessions. I don't want to harm the baby this way.
My husband of course, thinks she's golden so I can't talk to him.

 

[pinkcatgirl]

4 months is a long time ! I go crazy after 4 hours with my MIL. Has she come from a long way away? Can you plan some stuff eg nights out with friends and get her to babysit so she can feel involved and you can have a break?

 

[ajlj1126]

As difficult as it is, you have to stand up to her. If she is aggravating you she needs to know...unless she is just 100% socially impaired then she has to know that she's getting on your nerves. I went through something similar with my FIL.
I finally got to the point where I said he is no longer welcome here and he needs to control his anger or he's out of the picture all together. We haven't heard from him since. Oh well, his loss! Trust me when I say it was hard but the amount of stress and tension it resolved for me was well worth it!!

 

[myangel167]

My mil also drives me nuts. She means well, and helps us a lot, but she is the type of person who thinks she is always right! She will never admit when she is wrong or made a mistake. She literally thinks she is perfect and im not just saying that. The words, "I have no flaws." have come out of her mouth more than once and she happens to be very ditsy so its ironic that she thinks she has no flaws. She can also be condescending and very very critical at times. It drives my husband even more nuts than me. BUT, we do love her despite these things. So I just try my best to ignore it. Every once in awhile I'll say something, but I don't want to offend her either. I figure, She is already 54 years old. She is not going to change her ways now. She truly believes she is right all the time and Im not going to be able to convince her otherwise, and i'll drive myself crazy if I try. So I just let it go and don't let her bother me.

 

[first]

Hey,
Sounds AWFUL! I can't believe she is staying with you for 4 months, that is a really long time. 2 wks is too much for me. Have you thought about seeing a counsellor just so you have someone to truly vent to who might be able to help you find some coping strategies that will work for you? I did this just for a few sessions and it really helped me figure out some ways to cope. Good luck!

 

[notmommyyet]

I nipped that in the bud early on. I am very opinionated though. I didnt care of OH agreed or not. My body my kid and I said Id rather people think I am a bitch and a good mom then biting my tongue against things I knew were wrong. I wouldve snapped already if I was you. I would just tell you to please not be so annoying. Say I am pregnant and I have raging hormones that are bound to break through. Tell her its not her its you (if that makes you feel better) and tell her not to over ride or cut you off when your talking to your son.

 

[Ashersmomma]

I know how you feel. My MIL drives me absolutely nuts! I can't believe you have to put up with her for 4 months. I can't even be in the same room with my MIL for 4 minutes before I get aggravated. My DH also thinks his mom can't do anything wrong. She of course is a narcissistic bipolar mess who likes to bring people down to make herself feel better. Oh, and did I mention my son isn't allowed to be alone with her for reason related to this. Don't even get me started! I could rant for hours. I trust my little BIL to watch my son more than her(He just turned 18)

I suggest talking to your DH about it. Do it while you are alone and relaxed. Try to go about it gently. "I know that you love your mother, but this is how I feel" kind of thing. You can't help how you feel, and being pregnant intensifies all those feelings. He needs to understand that, and hopefully he will try to intervene when she gets to be too much. Let him know you are stressed and that it isn't good for the baby. Even though he might possibly get upset, it is best that he understands. He will get over it