How to keep your mind open ?

[Mrs Doddy]

I am a control freak and when I know what i want I plan for it and that's that,

I'm really scared about labour and have found the only way to cope is positive thinking, breathing technics and relaxation which I need to follow up in labour too

I really want a natural birth with just gas and air and a water birth in the hospital.

Having read up on pain relief and from Antenatal today really don't want drugs as they all seem to effect baby somehow during birth and feeding afterwards, I feel very strongly about breastfeeding and don't want anything to effect it if I have a choice.

However there is a 50/50 chance that I may be induced due to baby having dilated kidneys(this is going to be confirmed on a scan in a week and a half) whilst I should probably not think about it till I know the facts to whether this is on the cards or not I can't help but panic about this possibility of medical intervention

I know that I'm being very blinkered and need to open my mind to what will be will be and to go with the flow - how can I change to think this ???

 

[summer rain]

Hi

I haven't been induced but came very close to it with my middle son. In the end I didn't need to be induced but had a precipitous labour which came on as quickly; or even quicker than an induction and the contractions were incredibly strong. Although this wasn't pleasent I just kept telling myself it will be over quickly; when they examined me I was already 9cm dilated and I managed to do the last bit on just gas and air. I think you do need to keep an open mind; but at the same time think positively about what will happen if you are induced. Many women who are induced don't take anything other than gas and air, its intense but it is do-able. You may not be able to have the water birth if you're induced but there are many other things you can do to keep things as normal as possible; for example in most cases even if induced there is no need to be constantly strapped to a monitor.

Soph x

 

[bky]

I wanted a hospital or birthing centre water birth with just gas and air and ended up with a c-section. I'm mainly ok with the birth (less ok with what may be the aftereffects, but that's another thing). I almost ended up with an induction (labour the day before induction), but had made plans as to what type I wanted (foley catheter) which helped me come to terms with that. Other than that I ranked the things I wanted on my birth plan in order of their importance to me. I made my birth plan as a sort of pick and choose list so that even if one thing became impossible other things might still be able to happen if you know what I mean? I outlined what situations I would want what types of painkillers in, researched unexpected outcomes and outlined what I could control about that.

In all I only ended up with my top two priorities off my birth plan (healthy baby and placenta to come home with me).

 

[vespersonicca]

I am a control freak and when I know what i want I plan for it and that's that,

I'm really scared about labour and have found the only way to cope is positive thinking, breathing technics and relaxation which I need to follow up in labour too

I really want a natural birth with just gas and air and a water birth in the hospital.

Having read up on pain relief and from Antenatal today really don't want drugs as they all seem to effect baby somehow during birth and feeding afterwards, I feel very strongly about breastfeeding and don't want anything to effect it if I have a choice.

I just have to start by saying that I could have seriously been reading my own post! I'm a total control freak and I'm also hoping for the exact same birth you are!

Thinking about my birth plan and speaking with my husband about it really helped me iron out some of my concerns about too much interference and how to cope if everything just goes the opposite of what I want. I basically had to force myself to prioritize my birthing wishes and pick which ones I was absolutely firm on which I would need to compromise on if things went south. It was almost as though imagining it all happening helped me cope with the possibility. In the end I decided that the only thing I am absolutely firm on is that I do not want to be offered pain medication. I will ask if/when I choose. I hope some of my rambling will help you in some small way.

 

[snagglepat]

Our daughter had renal dilation and we had a home birth. When it became clear that her kidneys were remaining enlarged on a series of scans we did a lot of research into what this would mean for her post birth. We spoke to a paediatrician and a renal specialist and they told us that the treatment would be antibiotics from birth followed by one scan in the first 24 hours then one at 6 weeks. Often this resolves by itself after birth - it did for our daughter.

Once we knew this we got clarification that it didn't matter where we gave birth, as long as we had access to the antibiotics within a few hours. We had to negotiate it but in the end we just got the prescription antenatally so we could give it at home, had a wonderful home birth and then took our daughter in for her scan the day after she was born.

So my first suggestion is to find out specifically why they'd want to induce for kidney dilation - ask for the studies that show the benefits because I certainly didn't find any when I was pregnant with my daughter three years ago. Not having to be induced regardless would definitely help I'm sure!

I'd also look into natal hypnotherapy. I've worked with a number of doula clients who have been induced and who also used natal hypnotherapy and they all managed well. One in particular had no pain relief at all and danced all the way through her second stage! It's one of the benefits of Natal Hypnotherapy that you can use it regardless of the type of birth you have, from completely natural to caesarean. It will also help to reduce your anxiety before the birth and increase your trust in your body to handle whatever kind of birth you end up having. It's powerful stuff.

I've started thinking ahead to my birth and I've realised that I have quite a few fears saved up about it. Once I realised this last week I started using the NH CDs and I already feel better. I've still got a way to go but it's definitely helping.

Good luck with it all!

Gina. x

 

[Anna_due Dec]

Honestly my advice to anyone having there first baby is to not plan..well other than where and who's cutting the cord. How can you possibly know what you'll want in labour if you don't know how it feels. If you plan rigidly and then it doesn't work you'll be disappointed. Many a woman plans drug free and then takes the epi and then feels like a failure but there is a reason so many women "fail" it is so much more intense then you can possibly see coming. Women in early labour often say how much it hurts and those who've had babies kind of chuckle and say "that's nothing, wait until you're several hours in". I'm not trying to scare you but baby no.1 is incredibly hard to deliver most of the time and there is no shame in seeking relief. Having said that, i've never had the epi but i was lucky enough to have pretty quick births ie. 4hrs, 6hrs and 1hr. Just go with the flow and make your plan to take it as it comes. If you can do it drug free then yay for you, if you need the epi, nobody is judging you except for you.

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Thanks Anna,

Its not that I want to do it without drugs to prove to myself that I can do it without its the not wanting to have a limp and sleepy baby (and me) after birth and then won't breast feed, if I knew of a drug that would take away the pain and both me and the baby are alert, mobile and feeding, albeit tired at the end then I would be first in the line for everything, there just doesn't seem to be such drug (apart from water, tens and gas and air)

 

[lozzy21]

If you have to go for the induction, just think about the end result. If you need pain killers to give you a healthy mum and baby then so be it.

Just wait and see what happens and make the best out of what ever situation arises.

 

[Anna_due Dec]

Thanks Anna,

Its not that I want to do it without drugs to prove to myself that I can do it without its the not wanting to have a limp and sleepy baby (and me) after birth and then won't breast feed, if I knew of a drug that would take away the pain and both me and the baby are alert, mobile and feeding, albeit tired at the end then I would be first in the line for everything, there just doesn't seem to be such drug (apart from water, tens and gas and air)

I actually really agree with you. I don't touch the pain killers as i'm not keen on the idea of things near my spine and i had pethadine with baby's 1 and 2 and it made me practically unconscious but didn't bring ANY relief to the pain, didn't stop the baby breast feeding though, she was fine. I've never been induced but mainly because my kids tend to come (very) early. I suspect my labours may be similar to an induction as they are fast, intense from the beginning and i always end up with cords hanging off me and iv's as the babies are prem. When i look back on childbirth, the last thing i remember is the intervention. I think of the contractions (ouch) and when they hand me the baby or when in my case they didn't hand me the baby because he (baby no.2) was too sick.