krstn
First time mummy-to-be!
- Joined
- Jul 5, 2012
- Messages
- 54
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Hi everyone, I haven't been on here in a while because I've been very busy with sorting family issues out. However, the last thing I need to do before I can relax is tell my Dad that I'm pregnant. I would really appreciate any help I get here.. I am in two minds about what to do. Ill try to explain the situation without boring anyone..
When I was about 2 years old my Dad divorced my Mum and left her with me and my older sister (who was 3 at the time) while she was pregnant with my younger sister. To say the least he wasn't exactly an angel, as much as he likes to think he is, and I've heard some stories about him basically being an immature dick. He moved down south and, despite him asking my Mum to abort my younger sister, he started his own family with my step mum. To cut a long story short, I used to see him every month and over the years it has gradually got less and less to the point where neither of my sisters see any of them for years apart. He left my Mum broke and I have lived in poverty my whole life while he lives quite the opposite with his big house and his two cars, two holidays abroad a year, his carrivan and his boat.. you get the idea. He hasn't paid ANY money towards any of us for years. All with the exception of a RARELY recieved birthday card and a birthday present (if we are lucky). My mum has battled with depression and has been in and out hospital over the years, my older sister was temporarily living with him when she was 16 and me and my late gran who was getting treatment for cancer had to get my mum sectioned as she stopped taking her medication and went off the rails. So my Dad told my sister that she had to move back up here as she had a duty being 16 to look after us while my mum was in hospital. Lol this was my Father telling my sister that she had more of a right than he did to take care of his children. Right.. and that is just one of the many things he has done that's pissed me off. I'll try not to go into detail on anything else he's done, I just wanted you to have an insight on what a prick he is. And even when we see him it's like he is the nicest person ever to try and make up for it.. and I feel really bad about thinking the way I do. But when he doesnt speak to me for months again and goes on his expensive holidays I just feel the same way again. He constantly lets us down.. of course im jealous. I'm jealous that he had children with my mum, divorced her and had more children despite leaving my mum for the fact that he didnt want commitment. Eugh
I haven't spoken to him since May because he started to ignore my texts, I've always been the one out of my sisters to try and make an effort with him but now it's got to the point where I don't even care anymore.
So my question is, do I tell him I'm pregnant or do I keep it from him and let him find out himself?
Now, the main reason why I don't want to tell him is because in my opinion he hasn't acted like the Dad we needed. He is too busy with his life, that he forgets we even exist. He doesn't tell his friends that he has 5 children, no that would be embarrassing, so he tells them he's married with two beautiful children. (I actually saw him say that while I was snooping on his facebook about two years ago)
But.. the reason why I feel like I should tell him is because I have my half sister on facebook as well as cousins on his side of the family and people that are children of his friends, so obviously I don't want someone to post something on my facebook and for them to find out and tell their parents who will pass it on to my Dad etc. And I would HATE for him to turn around and say something along the lines of "oh if you told me I would have made more of an effort with seeing you all and I would of made sure I helped out with buying baby things" when I know for a fact I will get sweet fuck all from him whether he knows or not. He never keeps promises and constantly lets us down, 6 years ago he told me and my sisters that he had taken the money that would have been given to my mum every month and put it into a bank account for each of us to have when we turned 18. He even told social work that. Well I'm 18 now and of course nothing more has been mentioned about it, according to him we should of had £14,000 between us saved up. Lmao he is just such a let down, lying about things that do not need to be lied about just to make himself sound like a saint.
If I do tell him I will email him, don't want to risk texting him incase 'he changed his number' and I am definitely not phoning him. He doesn't deserve any respect from me. So I will break the news via email.
Should I tell him or keep it to myself for him to find out? And If I email him, should I tell him straight like I have in this post or just tell him and get it over and done with to avoid any grief? I have no idea how he will react.. he will probably speak to me less and use this as an excuse. I am actually stuck on what to say.
If you have read and lasted this long, THANK YOU! I really need some help on this one, my family would rather he found out himself but that's because they hate his guts. I need some advice from outside the situation. Thank you so much.x
When I was about 2 years old my Dad divorced my Mum and left her with me and my older sister (who was 3 at the time) while she was pregnant with my younger sister. To say the least he wasn't exactly an angel, as much as he likes to think he is, and I've heard some stories about him basically being an immature dick. He moved down south and, despite him asking my Mum to abort my younger sister, he started his own family with my step mum. To cut a long story short, I used to see him every month and over the years it has gradually got less and less to the point where neither of my sisters see any of them for years apart. He left my Mum broke and I have lived in poverty my whole life while he lives quite the opposite with his big house and his two cars, two holidays abroad a year, his carrivan and his boat.. you get the idea. He hasn't paid ANY money towards any of us for years. All with the exception of a RARELY recieved birthday card and a birthday present (if we are lucky). My mum has battled with depression and has been in and out hospital over the years, my older sister was temporarily living with him when she was 16 and me and my late gran who was getting treatment for cancer had to get my mum sectioned as she stopped taking her medication and went off the rails. So my Dad told my sister that she had to move back up here as she had a duty being 16 to look after us while my mum was in hospital. Lol this was my Father telling my sister that she had more of a right than he did to take care of his children. Right.. and that is just one of the many things he has done that's pissed me off. I'll try not to go into detail on anything else he's done, I just wanted you to have an insight on what a prick he is. And even when we see him it's like he is the nicest person ever to try and make up for it.. and I feel really bad about thinking the way I do. But when he doesnt speak to me for months again and goes on his expensive holidays I just feel the same way again. He constantly lets us down.. of course im jealous. I'm jealous that he had children with my mum, divorced her and had more children despite leaving my mum for the fact that he didnt want commitment. Eugh
I haven't spoken to him since May because he started to ignore my texts, I've always been the one out of my sisters to try and make an effort with him but now it's got to the point where I don't even care anymore.
So my question is, do I tell him I'm pregnant or do I keep it from him and let him find out himself?
Now, the main reason why I don't want to tell him is because in my opinion he hasn't acted like the Dad we needed. He is too busy with his life, that he forgets we even exist. He doesn't tell his friends that he has 5 children, no that would be embarrassing, so he tells them he's married with two beautiful children. (I actually saw him say that while I was snooping on his facebook about two years ago)
But.. the reason why I feel like I should tell him is because I have my half sister on facebook as well as cousins on his side of the family and people that are children of his friends, so obviously I don't want someone to post something on my facebook and for them to find out and tell their parents who will pass it on to my Dad etc. And I would HATE for him to turn around and say something along the lines of "oh if you told me I would have made more of an effort with seeing you all and I would of made sure I helped out with buying baby things" when I know for a fact I will get sweet fuck all from him whether he knows or not. He never keeps promises and constantly lets us down, 6 years ago he told me and my sisters that he had taken the money that would have been given to my mum every month and put it into a bank account for each of us to have when we turned 18. He even told social work that. Well I'm 18 now and of course nothing more has been mentioned about it, according to him we should of had £14,000 between us saved up. Lmao he is just such a let down, lying about things that do not need to be lied about just to make himself sound like a saint.
If I do tell him I will email him, don't want to risk texting him incase 'he changed his number' and I am definitely not phoning him. He doesn't deserve any respect from me. So I will break the news via email.
Should I tell him or keep it to myself for him to find out? And If I email him, should I tell him straight like I have in this post or just tell him and get it over and done with to avoid any grief? I have no idea how he will react.. he will probably speak to me less and use this as an excuse. I am actually stuck on what to say.
If you have read and lasted this long, THANK YOU! I really need some help on this one, my family would rather he found out himself but that's because they hate his guts. I need some advice from outside the situation. Thank you so much.x
) on facebook at about 12 weeks pregnant and decided people I DIDNT want in my life, or just didn't even care about could be deleted, so I did. Obviously after it got gossiped about my people I used to go to school with, a lot of people tried adding me again which I felt was just to be nosey, so I didn't accept.
