Husband doesn't understand

[wonderstruck]

Most of the time my DH is very supportive, but a lot of times he doesn't seem to get that I just can't function at my normal level. It's so frustrating. Like today (my one day off and god forbid I take a nap) he painted a room and didn't put down a floor cover and in turn got paint on the floor, and I told him I can't help him scrape the paint off it because my back is so sore, and he started complaining that I'm not helping with anything. He's off work for the holidays and I'm still working a very physical job full time. I'm sore, exhausted, stressed out, and he doesn't seem to care. If I tell him I'm tired he says he is too. If I say my back is sore he says his is too. He acts like I'm just being lazy and it is so stressful because I physically can't push myself to do the things he's expecting of me. If he cleans a room of the house he holds it against me all week, because I should have been the one to do it. And if I say anything it starts a fight. I don't know how to get him to understand how unreasonable he's being

 

[SaraVO]

My husband is like that at bedtime. He has had severe insomnia for the last several years so his sleep and comfort has always been more important than mine. But these days I'm getting uncomfortable. I toss and turn and have to pee four times a night and every time I get up little man starts moving again and it's wonderful and I love feeling him but it takes time for him to be quiet again. And my husband comes to bed after I do and he has this routine of pushing on my belly because he likes to feel the baby kick and it's great and I get it it's the only time of day he gets to feel him. He says it's reassuring and it can't really keep me awake all that much?! And if he wakes up before me he throws the lights on and let's our little dog in the room. He says because I nap so often it can't be that big of a deal. I get that it's his son too but I wish he would just be quite and not disturb us. They really can be dumb sometimes.

But the rest of the day he is pretty great. He has taken over so many of my chores I feel bitchy complaining about his bedtime routine. One thing that helped was this pregnancy book he got. The Cavemans Pregnancy Companion. It really did change his attitude after reading it. Before he was sympathetic but he wasn't really stepping up. After he looks for ways to make things easier for me.

 

[Qmama79]

That book is a great idea! My OH isn't too bad. He didn't get the first trimester where physically I didn't change that much but was utterly exhausted. Now, I can do much more, but I'm so big that he tells me to take it easy. I must admit that I've pulled the doctor's card a few times "doc told me to take it easy". He can't argue with that one!
GL!