I don't know anymore

[Peanut112]

Alrighty... So I'm back.. The last time I was here was forever ago. Not really it was like march

Possible trigger warning?? If you're sensitive (like me) about the miscarriages or anything similar, don't keep reading the next paragraph. Skip to the bottom.


... And then I had a miscarriage and some reason I just can't get over it. I HATE myself for it.. Not a day goes by that I don't think about my little baby. I was 11 1/2 weeks and just like that he (well, felt it was a boy) was gone.... Right now I'd be 35 weeks and 2 days.. And I'd be due in around 33 days. (I recently erased my pregnancy counter) I still have the ultrasound from that day. I came back home completely out of it, we lit 11 candles and let them burn all night... and then I was told I may not be able to have kids again....... It makes me afraid to even try for another, ever again. I swore I wouldn't even consider another for at least 5 years because I am still fairly young.....



However, my hubby has been hot on my tail about trying to have another and I've slowly been easing into the idea again. I'm scared, I'm really scared..... But here I am. Labelling myself as "Not Trying, Not Preventing"... Tonight is my first night of being off the pill, however my body has been doing odd things (larger sore breasts, nausea, headaches)


Edit: I'd also like to add that recent AF showed up right after I took a test and it was POSITIVE. :sad: my last pregnancy I was bleeding right through it.

Thanks for reading.

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I could have written this myself. Those feelings are exactly how I felt coming right off of my mmc back in July. I told myself I would not consider pregnancy again for another year at least. I even went to the doctor for birth control. Now here I am in the TWW sooner than I thought I would. I have the same as you: fatigue, cramping, dull achy headache, morning sickness and my bbs feel like lightning is shooting through them.

 

[Peanut112]

I could have written this myself. Those feelings are exactly how I felt coming right off of my mmc back in July. I told myself I would not consider pregnancy again for another year at least. I even went to the doctor for birth control. Now here I am in the TWW sooner than I thought I would. I have the same as you: fatigue, cramping, dull achy headache, morning sickness and my bbs feel like lightning is shooting through them.

Fingers crossed for you! and for a happier, more successful pregnancy