I hate waiting

[thompsonic]

I'm feeling so frustrated right now. It feels like I'm having to wait for everything I want, like nothing is within my reach. I want a baby so much it hurts but I can't have one. Not now, not for years. I dream about an accident happening and getting pregnant even though I know it would be the worst thing that could possibly happen to me. I'm tired of being a freak among my friends- I'm 15 going on 50. I feel already matured and ready for motherhood but I'm stuck in this stupid teenage body. I have my whole life ahead of me, but to me it just feels like I have a whole lot of waiting, waiting til I can finally be a mother. I thought being around babies would make me feel better but I just feel worse, to the point where I want to cry. I wish more than anything I was older, so I could do something about this, but I can't. I'm not WTT by choice but by necessity. I wish things were different but they aren't.

I'm usually not so depressed, honest. It's just lately everything seems to have magnified and my instincts are stronger than ever, but I'm not sure how to deal with them and how to channel them into something else so instead they just grow and grow til before I know it I'm breaking down.
I don't expect anyone to reply really, I'm just venting.

I just hope it all gets better soon.

 

[mum2morgan]

I feel for you. Not sure what say as I had Morgan when I was 16. I had wanted to be a mum since I was 13 and Morgan was an oopsy.
Take every year at a time. If the economy was to recover and your OH was to get a fab job, would that change things? And of course theres loads of other factors too. My point being nothing is set in stone, nothing! Try not to linger on something that may not happen. (But not in a omg i'm ruining my life way, just a - wow, things have changed for me way.)
That was probably no help at all. lol but {{{hugs}}} anyhows!

 

[amyclaire]

its awful isnt it. i feel like this so much, its just about getting through education n as mum2morgan says just taking it a bit at a time. as soon as theres something that makes u busy, that u cant avoid, time just flys. ive no choice about the work i have to do 4 uni - i hate it, but it makes time go quicker.
i really hope u feel better soon, i honestly understand so much how u feel, it just hurts so much, just like something is always missing
lots of hugsssss xxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[thompsonic]

Thanks for the replies. It's nice to know no matter how lonely you feel, you're never alone, someone is always feeling the same as you are. I have no idea what I'd do without BnB!

I hope you all feel better soon as well xxxx

 

[Missi]

I don't think this has so much to do with age thomsonic. There are people of all ages that ache for a baby-just look at the number of posts on BnB! I wish there was something to say that will take away all of the emotions you don't want.

I have wanted children since I was about 13, I'm 28 and started going out with my now DH in my teens-we still haven't started to try yet. The feelings don't get weaker, we just get stronger as ppl to deal with the feelings.

When it's meant to be I'm sure you will make a fantastic mam regardless of age. You are definitely not a freak and don't allow anyone to make you feel that you are. Hope this helps in some (even small) way.

 

[cdejdemommy]

Honey, what you're feeling is completely natural! Our bodies as women, no matter how young are old - were designed to WANT to carry a life - plain and simple!

I'm not going to tell you that you need to wait - you've heard it all before... but bringing a life into this world is a HUGE responsibility - one that you need to be as prepared for as possible. You will have your baby one day but until then enjoy being around the children you are related to, read as many parenting/baby books and magazines that you can get your hands, hang out here with us, focus on your education because once you have a child - it will be super hard to focus on ANYTHING but him or her.

I know nothing I just said helps your feelings of wanting to be a mother. I know where you are coming from because I was just there 8 years ago and even though that sounds like a long time - it's not - I still feel like I should be 16 years old most days. Time really does fly but you need to occupy your mind and your life. Don't waste your youth. I've always been more mature than anyone in my age group in school so it was really hard for me to connect with my friends and to this day ALL of my friends are older than me, at least by 4 or 5 years because that's the age group I connect with and identify with the most! You'll get there, hun!