I have a 1 year old!!

[Mummy1995]

It was my little girls birthday at the weekend!! we had so much fun!! She got absolutely spoilt and must have had 50+ presents plus some money for her bank account she stuffed her herself full of birthday cake too!!

It was such a lovely day and she's been so funny since, running around with her dollies talking to them and jumping on her trampoline and reading her books!! I'm so lucky to have her

Took the bars off her cot today to turn it into her bed in the hope that she will sleep better in there during her naps/evening before I bring her in with me as I think she doesn't like them because she's used to being 'free' put the breathing alarm on so it'll go off if she gets out of bed

Her birthday reinforced to me that fob and his family are a waste of space and that Isabella is way better off. None of them acknowledge her birthday, the same way they acted when she was born and on he first christmas. No present or card, not even an email or anything!! Just no acknowledgement of her existence! But hey like I already said, she's had more than enough presents and cards and more importantly she is so so loved by all my family luckily I have a great dad and older brother (35 who is also a father to 2 and 1 18m angel!) so Isabella won't be missing out on having a male role model!

Anyway that's all for now!! I couldn't be happier right now . Hope all of you and your babies and bumps are well. Xx

 

[babycrazy1706]

So glad she enjoyed her day! So precious!

Her dads fam can all go jump off a cliff. She is soooooooooooooo much better off without them!

Keep doin a great job! xx

 

[Dezireey]

Aw bless

Sounds like she had a lovely time. Yes, lots of love from Mummy and other family members is more than enough and makes a child happy.

Spoke to an old friend of mine this week from school. Didn't know that she never knew her dad ( he left when her Mum was pregnant and they never saw him again) she said she didn't give a toss about him all her life as she never knew or met him, which she says didn't affect her. Her mum is the best and my friend is a farm vet now and has a great family of her own.

Mummy's love can see anyone through anything!

 

[Mummy1995]

Aww it's so lovely to hear such a positive story! I'm hoping Isabella will be the same. And hopefully it'll be easier for our babies as line parent families are a lot more common these days

I worry about what will come when she's a teen and whether she will feel rejected and if that may cause her to become depressed or whatever. But I guess ill come to that if and when it happens. In the mean time ill give her lots of love and be honest with her xx

 

[Dezireey]

I don't think us women should ever worry really about bringing up a child alone as there is so much proof that as long as that single parent ( male or female actually) loves and does everything they can for their kids, then the majority of people grow up just fine. Sometimes kids lose their parent/ parents because they have passed away. And there are plenty of kids with a Mum and Dad but they still become troublemakers, so its all a bit hogwash from society, we are doing great!

I think the trouble we will have when our LO's get older, is explaining why they don't have a father actively in their life, not that they don't have a Dad at all. I will definitely not let my boy think his dad did not want him, difficult, but I have a few years yet to think about some good, truthful but kind answers!

 

[teal]

Happy belated birthday to your LO. You're doing a wonderful job!

I don't think us women should ever worry really about bringing up a child alone as there is so much proof that as long as that single parent ( male or female actually) loves and does everything they can for their kids, then the majority of people grow up just fine. Sometimes kids lose their parent/ parents because they have passed away. And there are plenty of kids with a Mum and Dad but they still become troublemakers, so its all a bit hogwash from society, we are doing great!

I think the trouble we will have when our LO's get older, is explaining why they don't have a father actively in their life, not that they don't have a Dad at all. I will definitely not let my boy think his dad did not want him, difficult, but I have a few years yet to think about some good, truthful but kind answers!

My thoughts on this are to tell my son that his father wasn't ready to be a father to him & reassure him that he's very loved.
I also think it's important to stay positive about his father. He'll see his father as a part of him and if I say how I really feel about my ex then I'd worry my son would take that to mean that I feel that way about a part of him.

I do believe it's more damaging to a child to have a parent who is only in his life when he feels like it.

 

[Dezireey]

I do believe it's more damaging to a child to have a parent who is only in his life when he feels like it.

^ Totally agree Teal. Must be so hard for Mums who have to deal with a flaky father coming in and out of LO's lives and messing them about. I know my LO will miss having a 'father' per se, but because he will (hopefully in my case) never know his Dad from day one, then he won't miss what he has never had. He is growing up now with me and his Grandparents in the house and he has three young male cousins and an Uncle that adore him. Loads of love to go around and some good male role models.

To quote the Beatles " All you need is love!"

 

[teal]

I do believe it's more damaging to a child to have a parent who is only in his life when he feels like it.

^ Totally agree Teal. Must be so hard for Mums who have to deal with a flaky father coming in and out of LO's lives and messing them about. I know my LO will miss having a 'father' per se, but because he will (hopefully in my case) never know his Dad from day one, then he won't miss what he has never had. He is growing up now with me and his Grandparents in the house and he has three young male cousins and an Uncle that adore him. Loads of love to go around and some good male role models.

To quote the Beatles " All you need is love!"

my son has never met his father. My ex essentially made me choose between him and the baby when I told him I was pregnant (I didn't think that happened when you were 24!) Obviously I chose my baby and I've not seen him since.

I tried to give him once last chance when my son was 21 months old but I received nothing but abuse from him.

xx

 

[Dezireey]

yep, same as me. He said, 'it's either me or the baby, you can't have both'. Trouble is, these idiots actually help you make your decision when they say things like that. Why would you give up a baby for a man that gives you that sort of ultimatum in the first place....duh?

Called the Police on my ex last week...but that is a whole other story!

Sorry to hijack your thread Mummy1995! Hugs xx

 

[Mummy1995]

That's what I worried about but I think I will also follow the 'he wasn't ready to be a dad yet' scenario. Because he wasn't/isn't. I have recorded/documented every single conversation we have had since Isabella was born so once I believe she is old enough or she starts asking more about why he isn't around, maybe in her teens then I will present her with the facts and let her decide if she wants to meet him or not. Assuming we can track him down and he wants to see her.. X

 

[Baby France]

I'm so glad that she had a good day

I can't imagine how hard it is with him not wanting/acknowledging to be involved xx

 

[Mummy1995]

Thanks to be honest I've learnt to expect nothing from him now! So wasn't disappointed or anything xx