i know its to early for me

[hannah berry]

i know its really early but my husband and i got to talking about seeing if we wait for the birth or have a gender cake reveal this time. he said since we have a boy and girl it doesn't mater. but ive been finding it really hard to picture myself with another boy. i love my little boy but really feel like it needs to be a girl. i suffered post natal depression with my daughter its really a hard thing to go through when you don't feel connected with your baby. i just cant see myself cutting into a blue cake and not crying. i told my husband its a bad idea. maybe its because i'm to connected to my son that i feel like im replacing him or that i grew up with 4 brothers being the oldest and just hate the idea of my daughter growing up like that. i know i sound ridiculous but i just ball my eyes out thinking of the day when the doctor tells me its a boy.

 

[kerrymom]

I agree, a gender reveal party wouldn't be a good idea. I have never wanted to wait until the birth to find out the sex, but I've heard people on here feel it's a good idea because at the moment you find out your baby is here, and real, and you fall in love with him/her no matter what.
I hope you find what works best for you, and you find some peace. Don't be too hard on yourself Mama- you are not alone!

 

[george83]

I agree, a gender reveal party would not be a good idea. I have never wanted to wait until the birth to find out the sex, but I've heard people on here feel it's a good idea because at the moment you find out your baby is here, and real, and you fall in love with him/her no matter what.
I hope you find what works best for you, and you find some peace. Don't be too hard on yourself Mama- you are not alone!

I agree the gender reveal probably would not be good, all that extra pressure on yourself to feel happy with the 'result' would probably stress you more. I'm one of those people who waited to the birth to find out the gender each time. With ds1 I didn't care - genuinely - but by the time I had ds2 and ds3 I was desperate for my little girl. I was convinced finding out the sex during pregnancy would have stopped me bonding and I would have lost all interest in being pregnant. Both times when baby was born and I found it was another boy I did have that instant pang of disappointment but it went very quickly, all that mattered was my baby in front of me.

I hope everything turns out ok for you x x

 

[hannah berry]

thanks for the support i think maybe waiting to see wouldnt be a bad thing its just my husband would be trying to eye ball the doctor for any signs of the gender i know him, it would drive him crazy lol. For the first two he begged the doctor for the gender even at 7 weeks!

 

[Boo44]

I agree, a gender reveal party would not be a good idea. I have never wanted to wait until the birth to find out the sex, but I've heard people on here feel it's a good idea because at the moment you find out your baby is here, and real, and you fall in love with him/her no matter what.
I hope you find what works best for you, and you find some peace. Don't be too hard on yourself Mama- you are not alone!

I agree the gender reveal probably would not be good, all that extra pressure on yourself to feel happy with the 'result' would probably stress you more. I'm one of those people who waited to the birth to find out the gender each time. With ds1 I didn't care - genuinely - but by the time I had ds2 and ds3 I was desperate for my little girl. I was convinced finding out the sex during pregnancy would have stopped me bonding and I would have lost all interest in being pregnant. Both times when baby was born and I found it was another boy I did have that instant pang of disappointment but it went very quickly, all that mattered was my baby in front of me.

I hope everything turns out ok for you x x

I did it the opposite way to this - I didn't find out with ds1 or ds2, but this time I wanted to know if it was another boy as I quite fancied having a girl. I think it works both ways as I can't imagine feeling disappointed at birth when the little baby is right in front of you! But happily for me when I found out at 16 weeks that this is my third little boy, I can't even really say I felt disappointed. In fact I felt a little bit excited at knowing and being able to refer to 'him' (probably because I've never had that before!). Now I can't imagine being without him and love him completely already which is totally separate to my feelings about not having a daughter, and I'm pleased I've worked through it all before birth

Good luck to you xxx