I really want to know why my LO doesn't like to be held whilst feeding!

[ThunderPearls]

My boy was fine as a newborn for the first couple of weeks and would be fine being cradled whilst either breastfeeding or bottlefeeding. Then for some reason he started fussing and arching his back and crying etc... I thought it was silent reflux to start with but then I discovered he is happiest lying flat or lying on his side on the mat/bed/couch to feed :/ so I doubt he would like that if he has reflux!? He went through a phase a couple of weeks ago of being fine in the cradle hold but is now back to fighting it!

He is fine being held upright against my chest or sitting on my knee but just hates it when I try and cradle him :/ if he is sleepy like in his night feeds then he is fine though... So I just dont understand it!

Its making life very difficult now as its awkward feeding him outside the house trying to find somewhere to lay him down and feel like people are judging me for it :/ its also ruining my breastfeeding as I cant liedown feed him when we are out so im just expressing him bottles throughout the day now and breastfeedinh through the night.

Do you think it could be physiological? Maybe see an osteopath? But that doesnt explain why he feeds fine at night in the cradle hold :/ I thought it may be teething a while ago but im not so sure now. Then I thought it was due to being traumatised at the breast after being forced on screaming by a stupid LC at hospital but he has fed fine a few times so I dont think its that either :/

Anyone have any suggestions?

Thanks

 

[keese22]

Lo goes though phases of only wanting to nurse laying down. I don't had any advice I'm afraid. I'm guessing its just a phase as he's now happy to he held again. Babies are funny little things aren't they!

 

[nabo86]

my DD appears to hate nursing during the day... she wriggles, pulls away from the breast, cries etc and I nearly give up BF every single day..!!

The only thing that gets me through is knowing that during the night she is a perfect example of a baby who BFs! She is perfectly still, pauses during feeds rather that yanking herself away and no crying!

I always make sure we are in a quiet place to feed, M&S is good - for example (I notice you're from Newcastle) I much prefer M&S to the BF rooms in the Metrocentre cos you can lock the door and its private so there are no onlookers who seem to be just perfect at feeding their baby!

I tried feeding LO 10 minutes before she was due to wake up today - she was a lot calmer during the feed and managed over 4 minutes before getting cranky... problem was she was then in a grump cos I'd woken her up before she was ready!!

 

[Katteh]

my DD appears to hate nursing during the day... she wriggles, pulls away from the breast, cries etc and I nearly give up BF every single day..!!

The only thing that gets me through is knowing that during the night she is a perfect example of a baby who BFs! She is perfectly still, pauses during feeds rather that yanking herself away and no crying!

I always make sure we are in a quiet place to feed, M&S is good - for example (I notice you're from Newcastle) I much prefer M&S to the BF rooms in the Metrocentre cos you can lock the door and its private so there are no onlookers who seem to be just perfect at feeding their baby!

I tried feeding LO 10 minutes before she was due to wake up today - she was a lot calmer during the feed and managed over 4 minutes before getting cranky... problem was she was then in a grump cos I'd woken her up before she was ready!!

In the nicest possible way, I'm so glad it's not just my little one who is like this!!

I find it so stressful it's untrue. It has got significantly worse over the past few weeks (he is 11 weeks old) and the only explanation anyone has been able to give me (including a lactation consultant) is that it's just because he is a bit windy!

He will take the first 5 mins max pretty calmly if he is hungry, but then the rest of the time he is desperately trying to wriggle away yet still trying to latch back on, he is a confused little man!

Have you ever worked out why your LO does it? Mine is better at night too but once the initial let down has slowed he just falls back to sleep, would be great if he stayed awake for a bit more to get a better (and calmer) feed! X

 

[lily28]

You are not alone, mine hates cradle hold or any kind of hold since he was 2.5 months. He is fine with side lying position, which is how I feed him 99% of the time. If i have to resort to cradle hold when I'm not at home I have to be standing up and walking around => so much for BF discreetly lol. And as soon as he has some milk and feels better he starts screaming because he hates being held like a baby. He will be quiet and nice if he is held up right or sitting in my lap. I try to teach him a sitting BF position lately now that he sits well...
Generally my son is a horrible day feeder, I feel it has become a battle to get him to feed properly. He will not take a bottle, he hates being held, he is constantly distracted , he refuses the breast if he is too tired, and he doesn't even comfort nurse.
At night he is perfect, so weird.

Good luck with everything.

 

[ThunderPearls]

So good to know I am not alone with the only odd breastfeeder! I wonder why they are so fussy! Ethan isnt any better and this last week is just growling at me no matter which position he is in even when not feeding he has loads of trapped wind and is just so uncomfy in general so I havent tries to cradle him at all.

I did manage to getva quick cradlefeed last week in fenwicks 'powder room' bit of their bathroom but it was still too distracting for him so ended up sitting in a corner discreetly expressing to top him up... Was so nerve wracking doing that in public!

 

[lily28]

When he started being difficult w/ cradle hold I also thought there is something wrong with him, I must be hurting him somehow. I even considered he must have a pain in the bones, because he was arching his back, and screamed till he turned blue. But then he'd be ok in bed.
We just have babies who are too distracted.

Consider yourself very fortunate that he takes the bottle, you can pump some milk before you go out, and plan an outing. I don't have that option unfortunately and I have to be a spectacle when I'm out. I bet the anti BF people use my picture for poison darts practice. It must look to other people that I do it on purpose in a "oooh look at me I'm breastfeeding!!!" sort of way. In reality I want to crawl under a rock.