I think I want to birth at home...HELP

[Donch03]

Hello lovely ladies,

I'm currently 14 weeks pregnant and this morning decided I wanted to look into home birthing. I had a traumAtic and long labour with my first son Joshua and had planned to have a water birth at the Birth Centre attached to my local hospital. After a 24 hour latent phase and with Joshua lying back to back I decided I couldn't cope and was transferred to the labour ward where I had an epidural.this resulted in my labour slowing down so contractions were augmented and it took a further 11 hours to go from 5-10 cm. After pushing for 15 minutes Joshua hadn't turned fully and it was decided I need assistance. He was delivered by vontouse in the end and I suffered a second degree tear.

I am so unbelievably frightened that I won't be able to cope again but am determined to labour in a relaxed environment and try and give myself the best possi le chance of having the labour I so desire. Is HB the way to go? when should I voice these issues with my midwife and where can I research into whether this the right thing for me? I suppose I'm just feeling as though I have faith in my bodies capabilities but I really like the idea of being in familiar surroundings, not having to stay in hospital and going straight to my own bed.

Please help ladies! What were your own experiences and what else do I need to consider?

Thanks x

 

[sam#3]

Well done you... it sounds like absolutely the right choice for you and i can totally understand why you would want to hb.

I also had a crappy hospital birth 1st time round then decided to have my 2nd at home and it could not have been further from my 1st experience. It was calm, peaceful and dare i say it virtually pain free! I am currently planning my 3rd HB!!

I would have a chat with your MW about your reasons for wanting to HB and hopefully they will be supportive of your choice and answer all the questions you have.

The ladies on here have a wealth of knowledge and experience between them so im sure no question will go unanswered

 

[Donch03]

I think my fear is that I have no idea what second stage labour feels like as I had an epidural last time. As a result what I feel I can't cope? X

 

[sam#3]

I think imo it is far easier to cope being at home - i found my hospital birth agony compared to home but at the hospital i had pethidine and g&a where as at home i had a bath!
Being able to use water really helped me, and being able to move around a lot too without any restrictions is amazing.
I think if you have faith in your body and yourself you will be fab also there will be the option of g&a if you want it at home

 

[Greta Chick]

Hi

How fantastic that you're thinking of a homebirth

I had DS on dry land at the birth centre, was induced, had G&A, pushed for 1hr 15 mins and had a severe 2nd degree tear but was a positive experience.

I had DD1 in the birthing pool at the now midwife led birth centre, laboured at home as long as possible (didn't believe I was in labour, got to the unit and was 5cm then gave birth after half an hour in the pool and a further 15 mins pushing in the pool). Only at the unit 45 minutes and just had a graze. I had G&A for the pushing because it came on all of a sudden and I had no control over it whatsoever which I didnt' like AT ALL. Again another positive experience.

DD2 was born on my living room floor at home (birth story in my sig at the bottom) and it was the most amazing experience of my life. I'd been doing natal hypnotherapy and I would absolutely swear by it if I was to have another baby. If I'm honest I was worried being at home wouldn't help that much, though it really did. The midwives brought in G&A but I had no idea they'd brought it in, I didn't need it at all. I had a slight tear (probably due to me pushing when I didn't have a contraction) but that was it.

I would say try the natal hypnotherapy cds to relax you, they worked wonders for me and also for my friend who had a hideous pregnancy and eventual emergency cs (the main maternity unit's fault due to their complete neglect). Like the other poster said, if you believe in yourself and your body's ability to give birth in a positive and calm way you'll do it.

Please post any questions on here, someone will always be able to help

xx

 

[Donch03]

Hi

How fantastic that you're thinking of a homebirth

I had DS on dry land at the birth centre, was induced, had G&A, pushed for 1hr 15 mins and had a severe 2nd degree tear but was a positive experience.

I had DD1 in the birthing pool at the now midwife led birth centre, laboured at home as long as possible (didn't believe I was in labour, got to the unit and was 5cm then gave birth after half an hour in the pool and a further 15 mins pushing in the pool). Only at the unit 45 minutes and just had a graze. I had G&A for the pushing because it came on all of a sudden and I had no control over it whatsoever which I didnt' like AT ALL. Again another positive experience.

DD2 was born on my living room floor at home (birth story in my sig at the bottom) and it was the most amazing experience of my life. I'd been doing natal hypnotherapy and I would absolutely swear by it if I was to have another baby. If I'm honest I was worried being at home wouldn't help that much, though it really did. The midwives brought in G&A but I had no idea they'd brought it in, I didn't need it at all. I had a slight tear (probably due to me pushing when I didn't have a contraction) but that was it.

I would say try the natal hypnotherapy cds to relax you, they worked wonders for me and also for my friend who had a hideous pregnancy and eventual emergency cs (the main maternity unit's fault due to their complete neglect). Like the other poster said, if you believe in yourself and your body's ability to give birth in a positive and calm way you'll do it.

Please post any questions on here, someone will always be able to help

xx

Wooooow!! I read your birth story and it's amazing hun! Sounds just like the kind of experience I'd like to have. I'm going to go to the local library next week and borrow some natural birthing books and hypnobirthing books if they have any xxx

 

[nov_mum]

I found transition the most painful but the pushing wasn't really painful as I recall. I was induced so I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. There was 20 mins when I would have given anything to make it stop and then it was pushing time and over : )

I think trying positions to get bubs laying in a better position might help. I understand posterior births are longer and more painful.

 

[Donch03]

Yeah I'm off the the understanding they are so at my 38 week check when I was told baby was laying in a posterior position I panicked big time!! From that point I practised optimal foetal positioning sitting on my ball, on all fours and leaning forward but he remained posterior up till labour started and for the duration.....oucheeeeee!! This time round I'll be leaving the sofa out in the cold from 32/34 weeks I reckon to give myself the best chance of keeping baby in an ideal position. It's mainly that that's worrying me about a HB! X

 

[lynnikins]

go for it hun, your first birth ended the same way mine did nearly except i was minus the epidural and had an episiotomy rather than a tear. i think second babies normally engage later so are easier to turn around if they arent in ideal position ( going from my own experience ds2 was not in optimal position till 40wks he was head down but not fully engaged he didnt have room to move up and down but sure did turn around on his head a few times in the final weeks )

 

[madasa]

I also had a crappy hospy birth 1st time. I was petrified of doing it again. In fact, I was determeined I would NOT do it again, not like that. Wouldn't put myself through THAT again if you paid me! I was counting on a HB being very different.... and it was. I can't WAIT to HB again!

I discussed it w/ my MW at my booking in, so at 12 weeks. I'd just tell her at your next appt. Surround yourself with positive birthy vibes and it will help to dispel your fear. It really CAN be wonderful, honest. Good luck :-D

 

[Fuchsia1412]

Also, never be pushed into midwife/health provider telling you you should have thought of it sooner. I would like to think they wouldn't say so, but some can be very controlling and seem to think you require their say so to make your own informed decisions. I think it's a fab idea, and I'm sure you would cope. As long as you want it and feel confident in your own decision, you will cope wonderfully.