...that I made my way into this forum for a few month. We have been actively trying to conceive, and it has CONSUMED me. I have become totally upset, and my breaking point was last night. The point where I realized that I have got to take a step back. If it happens, it does.. but I can not stress over it.. I am supposed to be ovulating any day. Yesterday or Today/tonight sometime. OH knew that, and he knew we were supposed to BD last night. So then he gets into bed.. and he starts snoring.. Yep, snoring. Then he rolls over and says "I'll make it up to you another night.. I'm too tired tonight." It isn't like he can make me ovulate again, URGH.. But he was going to make bding up to me. :/ And you know what I did? I went into the living room and starting CRYING my EYES out. You know the type of cry. They one where you are gulping breathes trying to calm down, but you can't stop.. Your lips are blubbering? Yep.. That kind of crying. I felt so failed. So hopeless. I knew right then and there, that this was not our month. Just because of that one, let down. That is when I realized that I HAVE to put this on a back burner for a couple months. To let myself calm down, and realize that we just need to have SEX. FUN, HOT SEX. No trying to have a baby, No timing it perfectly. Just sex.. like we used to. Spontaneous. I need ideas on how to make sex fun again.. I need ideas on how to NOT let this quickly become TTC again. I want it to stay NTNP.. for the sake of my emotional sanity (lol). I know I'm a little dramatic. But that is really how I felt last night.