I think it's over :'( devastated

[Ruth 1980]

I've been thinking about posting but not doing it because I don't even know what to say, and I don't know if there is any help for me
I bf dd1 for 16 and a half months, no top ups, no pumping, straight from me, and she self weaned. We had huge problems with latching and I tried EVERYTHING but ended up that nipple shields worked so that's what I had to use. (I also had to go off ALL dairy as she was intolerant)
I thought "there's no way I can have a bad bf'ing experience this time. I can't be dealt a bad hand twice". Alas I was horribly wrong.
Dd2 also cannot latch well. Last time I went to all the bf support groups, read all the support websites, read everything L'LL has written and watched all the YouTube vids, so I don't feel uneducated in what I have to try to do. But dd2 destroyed my right nipple, so I tried nipple shields again, they didnt change much so I stopped them. I figured since she was getting enough milk I'd live with the pain and just bite myself to get through feeds. BUT I got mastitis bad on that side. My right side always has the better supply but eventually it got so bad that no milk at all would come out so I've had to feed off the left only. I'm on antibiotics, and doing all the things you're supposed to do when have mastitis, I'm pumping for up to half an hour every 3hrs (and during the night) off the bad side.
But here lies the source of my heartbreak: Dd is draining the left side completely after about 8minutes now (as in when I hand express after it there is nothing at all coming, and the breast is super-soft &squishy) and half an hour of pumping on my bad side is only producing half an ounce of milk I was getting 1.5ozs max, then it went down to 1oz and now half an oz. I feel like my milk has disappeared! And I can't stop crying about it
(I should add, I don't know if this has affected the milk:
I had a nasty bladder infection pre delivery and had to take massive doses of antibiotics before, during and after delivery; I had a c section, major blood loss and am anaemic and taking iron; I had an awful chest infection going into hospital, that worsened during my time in hosp as I couldn't cough properly because of the wound; and now obviously more antibiotics for the mastitis)
Sorry this was so long. For anyone that got this far- do I just need to accept that my milk has gone? Or might it come back? Can I supplement with formula (I don't even know how to use it!) and then manage to gradually make more milk after?......
Thank you in advance x

 

[leigh5tom]

Hi Ruth. My story almost mirrors yours. My son couldn't latch due to tongue tie. My nipples looked like they had been rubbed on a cheese grater. The pain was immense! Because he couldn't get my milk off well enough I got mastitis in my left breast. My supply from that boob was drastically reduced because my ducts were so blocked & inflamed milk just couldn't get through. In the meantime, Joshua was losing weight quite quickly. His latch became perfect once his tongue was done so I set about increasing my supply. I fed fed fed as much as I could & also expressed (getting about 1/4-1/2oz out of Lefty and about 1/2-1oz out of righty. I went to my gp who prescribed me domperidone which helps increase supply. I also take fenugreek & eat lactation cookies which seem to help too. I had to top up my son after each feed with either ebm or formula and he finally got back to his birthweight at 3 1/2 weeks old. With a combination of expressing, medication and just plain perseverance my milk is slowly increasing and he has roughly only 1 top up now a day, usual mid afternoon.

Good luck, I really hope you can continue breastfeeding xxxxx

 

[noon_child]

I'm sure there were some ladies on here when I was first feeding who only used one breast, and ladies with twins manage to get enough milk for both babes (so equivalent to feeding one baby off one boob). I'm not saying it'll be easy but if you treat it like a growth spurt and just feed, feed, feed from your good side it should only take a few days for your body to catch on to the idea. If LO is screamingly hungry after draining lefty you could do small top-ups (enough to just satisfy him but still meaning he'll come back to the boob more frequently to increase supply.) You could buy some pre-prepared formula for small top-ups (it is more expensive but if you aren't using a lot it is much easier than mixing the powder).

My LO had a crappy latch and her weight was slow to increase. I did top-ups at 6 weeks. Started with 1oz after 4 of her daily feeds (not needed for the first two morning feeds). However I felt so upset watching her gulp it down that NCT advised doing ONE 4oz feed at whatever point in the day I wasn't coping (e.g 5pm when boobs seemed totally flat and she was scream/latch/scream/latch/scream/latch) and pump while she drank that.

I never increased the amount of the top up so as she got bigger she had to get any extra from ME not from the bottle. This meant we could stop top-ups quite easily.

I'm sure that if there are still hormones in your body from feeding from the good boob that when the bad one has had a rest you will be able to produce milk from it again.

Of course all this is SUCH hard work and I would never tell anyone they HAD to do it. Just if you need to keep going with breastfeeding (I was sooo ridiculously stubborn about it) then this is my advice. But you need to do whatever keeps you sane!

 

[BigAl]

Are you giving top ups now? It's more than possible to have enough milk supply in one breast, you will just be lopsided.
If your nipple isn't looking too bad, I would just start feeding baby on the bad side first to help stimulate supply, then switch to the other once baby is fed up.
It sounds more like you had a latching issue on one side, if it wasn't draining and giving you mastitis. I found one side more difficult, but just got lazy, and ended up mainly feeding on one side anyway, as it was comfier for me. I had no issues through this.

 

[Here_we_go]

I just wanted to say that my daughter had latching issues from the start and soon developed a preference and would only nurse from my right side. I would pump the left side and freeze it. Eventually when I had a good stash built up, I dropped the pumping. I have lopsided breasts but DD now only nurses from my right side and has done so for about 9-10 months.

The more your lil one nurses, the more milk your boob will produce. If your LO can successfully drain one side without issues, then that is great and it WILL provide enough to EBF. I EBF my daughter for 6 months and for about 2 of those months, it was from the right side ONLY No formula was ever needed. It can be done!

 

[supertabby]

Oh poor you, no wonder you're upset!

I know you've been researching and trying loads, but have you had lo checked for tongue tie/lip tie? This can cause latching issues that sometimes lead to the problems you're having. Worth looking into since it sounds like you still want to bf if you can find a way?

Also if you're getting milk on one side there's no reason why you can't just bf from one boob. You'll be a bit lopsided but it could be possible to build up supply on the other side in time and balance them out (and in a good bra nobody will know!). I'm guessing you've looked into things like fenugreek?

And if you need to call it a day then there's no harm - formula is healthy and nutritious. Thr important thing is a thriving baby and a mum who isn't totally frazzled with pain and frustration.

Good luck!

 

[Ruth 1980]

Ladies **THANK YOU** for taking the time to reply, and I'm so sorry I'm only responding now! I haven't been on BnB since, I've had problems with Internet on my phone (I use this instead of computer).

So I guess the positive news is-.... I'm still bf'ing!! As one of you said, I'm totally stubborn too and have just been telling myself to battle through each day at a time.

Dd2 is 7weeks old tomorrow, and I'm not gonna lie, I hate bf'ing her and dread the start of each feed. I have continued pumping the right (what was bad boob) and pump four or five times a day, but my left did eventually increase supply (as you all said it would!) so now she feeds entirely off that side.
Latching is still a problem though: The Gp and nurses have said she doesn't have tongue/lip tie, and the bf'ing counsellor said my nipples stick out enough that she wouldn't say I need nipple shields, the public health nurse says she appears to be latched on well. BUT.... It's absolute agony! I can't breathe with the pain for the first maybe 3minutes of a feed, and during the feed there are any one of a list of things that will turn her latch bad again: She's got wind/she needs to fart/she's about to poo/she's tired/milk coming too fast. Every feed is just horrible but I'm persevering in the hope that next week everything will just disappear and then run smoothly.
Thank you all again x

 

[noon_child]

Ladies **THANK YOU** for taking the time to reply, and I'm so sorry I'm only responding now! I haven't been on BnB since, I've had problems with Internet on my phone (I use this instead of computer).

So I guess the positive news is-.... I'm still bf'ing!! As one of you said, I'm totally stubborn too and have just been telling myself to battle through each day at a time.

Dd2 is 7weeks old tomorrow, and I'm not gonna lie, I hate bf'ing her and dread the start of each feed. I have continued pumping the right (what was bad boob) and pump four or five times a day, but my left did eventually increase supply (as you all said it would!) so now she feeds entirely off that side.
Latching is still a problem though: The Gp and nurses have said she doesn't have tongue/lip tie, and the bf'ing counsellor said my nipples stick out enough that she wouldn't say I need nipple shields, the public health nurse says she appears to be latched on well. BUT.... It's absolute agony! I can't breathe with the pain for the first maybe 3minutes of a feed, and during the feed there are any one of a list of things that will turn her latch bad again: She's got wind/she needs to fart/she's about to poo/she's tired/milk coming too fast. Every feed is just horrible but I'm persevering in the hope that next week everything will just disappear and then run smoothly.
Thank you all again x

I was stubborn too and it DID get better at week 10. It could happen any time for you! I think my LO just needed to get big enough for it to be comfortable for her to take the nipple properly and comfortable for her to have so much milk in her mouth (she used to clamp on with her gums or slip backwards when she felt overwhelmed by milk).

LLL and NCT lactation consultants were a great support to me. While my midwifes said her latch "looked" fine, the LC's stayed for full feeds with me, watched how she slipped off, noted the shape of my nipples after feeds, showed me alternative feeding positions (after seeing them I did three weeks football hold in my 'bad' side till LO got better at feeding and could switch back to cradle/cross cradle).

 

[Ruth 1980]

Ladies **THANK YOU** for taking the time to reply, and I'm so sorry I'm only responding now! I haven't been on BnB since, I've had problems with Internet on my phone (I use this instead of computer).

So I guess the positive news is-.... I'm still bf'ing!! As one of you said, I'm totally stubborn too and have just been telling myself to battle through each day at a time.

Dd2 is 7weeks old tomorrow, and I'm not gonna lie, I hate bf'ing her and dread the start of each feed. I have continued pumping the right (what was bad boob) and pump four or five times a day, but my left did eventually increase supply (as you all said it would!) so now she feeds entirely off that side.
Latching is still a problem though: The Gp and nurses have said she doesn't have tongue/lip tie, and the bf'ing counsellor said my nipples stick out enough that she wouldn't say I need nipple shields, the public health nurse says she appears to be latched on well. BUT.... It's absolute agony! I can't breathe with the pain for the first maybe 3minutes of a feed, and during the feed there are any one of a list of things that will turn her latch bad again: She's got wind/she needs to fart/she's about to poo/she's tired/milk coming too fast. Every feed is just horrible but I'm persevering in the hope that next week everything will just disappear and then run smoothly.
Thank you all again x

I was stubborn too and it DID get better at week 10. It could happen any time for you! I think my LO just needed to get big enough for it to be comfortable for her to take the nipple properly and comfortable for her to have so much milk in her mouth (she used to clamp on with her gums or slip backwards when she felt overwhelmed by milk).

LLL and NCT lactation consultants were a great support to me. While my midwifes said her latch "looked" fine, the LC's stayed for full feeds with me, watched how she slipped off, noted the shape of my nipples after feeds, showed me alternative feeding positions (after seeing them I did three weeks football hold in my 'bad' side till LO got better at feeding and could switch back to cradle/cross cradle).

Thank you so much
It's stories like that, that give me hope. I hope it happens soon! There is a lactation consultant about 45mins drive from where I live, so I think I'll try to go see her as you've said, so she can watch the whole thing. Thank you for your encouragement x