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Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by CloverMouse, Nov 14, 2011.
Hell no your not being unreasonable.
This is your special day and you deserve it all for yourself. I would deny any joint shower if it was me. I'd rather not have one, than have to share with someone.
A shower for a third baby?? Seriously?
I don't much like baby showers anyway, but for a third baby it is nuts. It is her own fault if she doesn't have baby stuff any more and greedy to expect every one else to chip in to replace it brand new for her.
If you don't want a joint shower then say no. Pick your own date, get a friend of yours who is not part of that side of the family to organize it. If they are invited as guests then it is exceptionally rude to try to tack someone else's shower onto it aswell. If you are invited to a wedding you don't try to have your own marriage while you are there!
My sister and I had joint showers but we were happy to be pregnant together and happy to have our shower together. Frankly, I'm not a big fan of showers period so I think I was happy to have mine with her so the focus wouldn't be on me so much.
I don't enjoy being the center of attention and I really never wanted a shower. So I guess if it was something you've completely been excited about then sharing might not be so great.
Anyhow, I wouldn't get all worked up about it. I'd just say that since this is your first- you'd like to keep your shower separate. No biggie! Good Luck!
why dont you get one of your friends to organise you one and if any one from that side of the family asks say it was your friends idea to do you one, then its pre-arranged and they cant say anything if someone else is organising it!! xx
No i do not think you are selfish for wanting your own shower for your baby. Weather it being you 1st or not. I'd just say i already have someone planing mine, make something up. lol
I wouldn't do it thought esp. if you don't want to.
If you dont want to have a joint one just say no and if you arent bothered then say yes. Im from the UK and dont understand the point of a baby shower anyway TBH!
my mind is seriously in the gutter because I had to read your post a few times to figure out why she wanted to take a shower with you
Personally I think baby showers should be for first babies, and for new parents who don't have lots of money to buy everything they need. Don't feel guilty about wanting your own baby shower. Your sister should have saved some things from her previous pregnancies. And being a 3rd time mom, she probably realizes that she doesn't need most of that new baby stuff anyway.
Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I think its inappropriate for her to expect a shower for her third baby. I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to want your own shower, esp since its your first baby. A baby shower is potentially the last time a mother gets to be the center of attention, and you definitely deserve your moment.
I don't believe in showers after number 1. Unless its like my mom who had my brother when she was 20 and then me 20 years later!
OOOPS thought you meant like, water shower, until I read the feedback!! But no, you aarent being unreasonable, this is your baby so its still about you.
where Im from you dont get a baby shower for a 2nd 3rd and so forth so I dont see why she would have one you definatly deserve a shower all on your own Id just decline if they say they want to do that
Glad I'm not being completely unreasonable!
I do think a shower for a third child is excessive.. especially since her oldest is going to be only 5 this year and the younger child is only 2!
You are not being unreasonable. Just say no! It's your first!
I like the idea of having a friend/somebody not from her side of the family organising something for YOU and YOU alone!
I will have a shower (my first) as some of the ladies from work have been fantastic through the last few years (with an mc, especially) and altho I am not a 'centre of attention' person, two of the receptionists (I work at a further education college) are so incredibly supportive and lovely that I was told 'it's not for me, but for the baby'...also, due to worries re:mc, we haven't bought anything, but my students and colleagues are giving us things (clothes, little pressies), which is really sweet!
I thought the same thing, but I first thought that she meant with her OH.
I will probably be thrown and shower and really appreciate it. The family out here is not big into joint things, and the last baby for everyone is quite a distance away. My hubby has the two kids, and they were given showers for both. But, the kids were six years apart, so by then, they really didn't have much left.
I don't have a problem with joint events. When I started having b-day parties (my parent's were of a religious background that didn't celebrate birthdays), I always had them with one of my best friends. We also had multi-family Christmas at that point with all our friends.