I'm 16, pregnant and scared as heck

[ellagraciexx]

Hey everyone. So as you can probably tell from the title I am pregnant at 16. I found and yesterday and I'm shocked, confused and so so scared. I haven't told anyone yet and I really need people to be there for me. I've never really had a father figure growing up and I know that my older brother will be disappointed. I'm not sure how my mum will react given she had James (my brother) at 19, but I'm so apprehensive to tell anyone. Not even my best friend knows yet. So getting to the story:
I'm pretty much a tomboy, better friends with the guys than the girls (with one exception) and playing heaps of sports (Which i'm also really upset about because I'm not sure what I can still do when I'm pregnant). I have this massive group of friends, and they're kinda the jock/popular guys at my high school, but they're all so kind and compassionate and always have mine and each other's backs. So my best (girl) friend Mads and I always hang out with them, we're just two of the boys to them. Anyway, I've had this long developing romance with one of the boys, Josh. We've been friends for nearly 13 years and we've had a thing for at least three years now. Anyway, we always have sleepovers, our mums are quite close and so are our older brothers. We've grown up together so our parents trust us a heap. Anyway long story short we had sex at a close friends party. Mind you I'm on the pill, but I didn't take one dose because I was at a friends house and forgot to take it. Anyway me - being stupid decided to neglect my doctor's warnings and have sex 4 days after consciously forgetting an active pill and now here I am. I don't know what to do, and I know people might judge me, but I just really need some advice from experienced ladies and mothers and I'm so scared I really don't know what to do with myself!! Any suggestions or comments or advice is very very much appreciated x

 

[Chezzer]

I'm a mum and this pregnancy isn't going to suddenly vanish u will start to show or be sick no longer need your monthly period stuff, people will guess, get mum on her own and make sure she's not busy or in the middle of doing something call her in your room and just tell her count in your head 1 2 3 mum I'm pregnant. Getting mad won't help so I hope your mum doesn't. Just be honest . X

 

[ellagraciexx]

Thank you! I plan on going to my GP within the next two or three days, to discuss everything. After the pregnancy has been completely confirmed and the medical side has been discussed, I will tell her. I'm such an anxious person so this is scary and most likely going to be really difficult for me. Thank you so much x

 

[Jamiesmummy22]

I understand your fears but you do need to be honest and tell your mum. She needs to know so she can support you. My best friend fell pregnant at 15 and had her daughter when she was 16... she didn’t want kids but found herself in this situation after failed contraception. She hid her pregnancy from her mum for 6 months for fear and it done her no good. She missed her 12 week scan and midwife appointments because she hid her pregnancy. Her mum ended up guessing she was pregnant when she no longer asked her for money for her monthly period things. Her mum didn’t take it well and tried to force her into an abortion but my best friend stood her ground. Her daughter is now 12 and she has another daughter who is 10 and she is a fantastic mum to her kids... she has raised them to be bright intelligent and polite young girls. Good luck, I hope all goes well x

 

[DobbyForever]

I agree that telling your mom sooner rather than later is best. I hope she takes it well, but it’s ok if she doesn’t.

I’m 29, own a theee bedroom house, and have a stable career and my mom still flipped out when I announced my pregnancy. But telling her early gave her a chance to process her emotions and support me. She went to most of my prenatal and has always been there.

Just keep in mind if she dies react poorly, it’s just because she loves you. She was a young, single mom once and no parent wants hardship for their children. And anger is the first step of grieving. Just like we wouldn’t fault a snake for biting you if you step on its tail, you can’t fault or react to your mom getting upset. Just try to say as little as you can while she vents to keep it from getting worse or having two people saying things they don’t mean. But the sooner you tell her the sooner she can move passed the shock and support you.

Plus you need things. You need prenatal vitamins and to eat well.

As far as exercise, depends on the sport. But you can exercise as normal just pay attention to your body signals. Obviously anything where blows to your abdomen are possible are off limits.

Big hugs

 

[ellagraciexx]

Hey guys. First of all, thank you all for the words of wisdom and support, it means a lot!

Okay so, I went to my GP yesterday and they confirmed that I am 100% pregnant...Then I went straight to my bf's house and just cried to him and his mum (who is pretty chill) and we were all crying together and saying we would get through this. Because his mum and mine are best friends, she called her and just explained the situation and she came over and we just spent hours and hours talking about everything. It ended up being a really nice night, apart from all the crying - I was so unimaginably overemotional it was intense - but we were just bonding and we watched movies. Both the mums (and bf's dad) were disappointed but they were very very supportive and my mother booked an appointment with the gynaecologist.

My brother is a different story. Because we never really had a dad growing up, he's always been super protective of me and very overbearing at times. I told him very calmly and tried my best not to cry but I couldn't help myself. Unsurprisingly he took it hard and he told me to get out that that he didn't want to talk to me at the moment. I knew he wasn't going to react well but I'm still really upset about this. Any suggestions on how to ease the tension between us?

Thanks ladies x have a good day!

 

[Bevziibubble]

I'm glad both your mums know now and are being understanding and supportive.
I'm sorry your brother hasn't taken the news well. Hopefully once it's sunk in he will come around.

 

[DobbyForever]

Agreed. Give your brother space to process and let him come to you. Hopefully it’s sooner rather than later.

And ditto that it’s great all the parents know and your mom is helping you get on track with your prenatal. Best of luck to you on this journey!

 

[mara16jade]

How's everything going? Did your brother come around yet?

 

[Chezzer]

Hey guys. First of all, thank you all for the words of wisdom and support, it means a lot!

Okay so, I went to my GP yesterday and they confirmed that I am 100% pregnant...Then I went straight to my bf's house and just cried to him and his mum (who is pretty chill) and we were all crying together and saying we would get through this. Because his mum and mine are best friends, she called her and just explained the situation and she came over and we just spent hours and hours talking about everything. It ended up being a really nice night, apart from all the crying - I was so unimaginably overemotional it was intense - but we were just bonding and we watched movies. Both the mums (and bf's dad) were disappointed but they were very very supportive and my mother booked an appointment with the gynaecologist.

My brother is a different story. Because we never really had a dad growing up, he's always been super protective of me and very overbearing at times. I told him very calmly and tried my best not to cry but I couldn't help myself. Unsurprisingly he took it hard and he told me to get out that that he didn't want to talk to me at the moment. I knew he wasn't going to react well but I'm still really upset about this. Any suggestions on how to ease the tension between us?

Thanks ladies x have a good day!

Can't believe ya bro told u to get out may be he's jealous cos your mum's main focus will now be you don't worry about him you have your mum bf mum's for support and your bf no doubt your best mate too, how's things going now.

 

[Cath_Heather]

Hi, I'd love to follow your journey! All the best x