I want one so badly!
So here's the deal. From October until February, my fiance and I had his 2 children (2 and 4) living with us. Then his ex ran off out of state with them. Anyways, long story short, I think both of us have talked about this on multiple occasions.
At first, I kept trying to hide from him how I felt about having a baby (NOW! lol), but eventually I told him because he kept bugging me about why I was depressed. When I told him that he said "then let's have one!" I told him we can't because of money issues.
But then he acts very worried when my period doesn't come or something. He constantly talks about us having kids (he wants at least 4 yikes!) and any time he hears a name he likes he tells me "That will be our first boy/girl's name". He has this running joke where he will grab my belly and say "well hello there little guy". It's kind of weird.
Well, here in about a month our financial situation is going to change drastically. I will go from making 1000 dollars per month to about 3000 per month. Let me summarize our financial situation:
1. We do not pay rent. We live in a 2 bedroom farm house that my parents gave to us. We pay no mortgage or anything.
2. We both work for my parents who make a very good deal of money from their four businesses. We work 9am-4pm and there is a nursery there.
3. We pay $70.00 per month in electric, 500 every 6 months for gas, both of us smoke (but that would obviously change if I were pregnant). We put about $60 per week into gas for the car. We do not pay for water or sewage as we live in a farm house and it runs off of a well.
4. I will be in my last year at uni next year. I will probably be doing online classes during the winter tho because the drive is an hour.
So obviously, I am not sure what to do or if I should approach him about the issue. I have thought to take the next 6 months to organize and fix up the house and then ask him if maybe we could TTC in about a year or so. But the other half of me says I don't want to wait that long and there really is no reason to wait that long. Sure, the house isn't perfect, but it is not a safety hazard (well, once we clean it up anyways) lol. Me and my 2 brothers were raised in this house as is...and one of them was a newborn, so I refuse to believe that this house couldn't provide for one child.
I do want to move to another state in 3-4 years, but I'm simply not willing to wait that long to start a family. So....how do I bring this up to him, have good communication with him, and find out what he really wants in the future? Because by the way he acts it seems like he couldn't care less whether we had one tomorrow or in 10 years. lol.
Sorry this was so tediously long (novel, anyone?) but seriously I could use the advice and thank you so much in advance.
So here's the deal. From October until February, my fiance and I had his 2 children (2 and 4) living with us. Then his ex ran off out of state with them. Anyways, long story short, I think both of us have talked about this on multiple occasions.
At first, I kept trying to hide from him how I felt about having a baby (NOW! lol), but eventually I told him because he kept bugging me about why I was depressed. When I told him that he said "then let's have one!" I told him we can't because of money issues.
But then he acts very worried when my period doesn't come or something. He constantly talks about us having kids (he wants at least 4 yikes!) and any time he hears a name he likes he tells me "That will be our first boy/girl's name". He has this running joke where he will grab my belly and say "well hello there little guy". It's kind of weird.
Well, here in about a month our financial situation is going to change drastically. I will go from making 1000 dollars per month to about 3000 per month. Let me summarize our financial situation:
1. We do not pay rent. We live in a 2 bedroom farm house that my parents gave to us. We pay no mortgage or anything.
2. We both work for my parents who make a very good deal of money from their four businesses. We work 9am-4pm and there is a nursery there.
3. We pay $70.00 per month in electric, 500 every 6 months for gas, both of us smoke (but that would obviously change if I were pregnant). We put about $60 per week into gas for the car. We do not pay for water or sewage as we live in a farm house and it runs off of a well.
4. I will be in my last year at uni next year. I will probably be doing online classes during the winter tho because the drive is an hour.
So obviously, I am not sure what to do or if I should approach him about the issue. I have thought to take the next 6 months to organize and fix up the house and then ask him if maybe we could TTC in about a year or so. But the other half of me says I don't want to wait that long and there really is no reason to wait that long. Sure, the house isn't perfect, but it is not a safety hazard (well, once we clean it up anyways) lol. Me and my 2 brothers were raised in this house as is...and one of them was a newborn, so I refuse to believe that this house couldn't provide for one child.
I do want to move to another state in 3-4 years, but I'm simply not willing to wait that long to start a family. So....how do I bring this up to him, have good communication with him, and find out what he really wants in the future? Because by the way he acts it seems like he couldn't care less whether we had one tomorrow or in 10 years. lol.
Sorry this was so tediously long (novel, anyone?) but seriously I could use the advice and thank you so much in advance.
So I'd say talk to your OH, see what he says when you say 'Hey, what if we get pregnant sometime soon... what do you think about that"?
