In Laws?

[~ Vicky ~]

Have any of you thought about the involvement your ex in-laws will have? Do they want involvement?

I've always gotten on with my in-laws. My ex is an only child, so they treated me like a daughter. But since myself and Gav split up, bearing in mind its all down to him having his brains in his pants, which his parents know about, they don't want to know.

I don't know if its just down to them looking out for their own or what, but they don't seem to want anything to do with the baby and it makes me very sad. Even if Daddy is an ass, I still want my baby to know her other set of Grandparents. I've been told to give it time and they'll come round, but it doesn't make any sense. The amount of times they've said they can't wait to be Grandparents, and now they're going to be... ?

Are any of you's giving Grandparents access of their own or do they not want to know either?

 

[lauren-kate]

I have a very good relationship with Ryan's grandparents on the other side (guess I'll call them in-laws for the sake of not having to write that out all the time!). I'd never even met them before he was born so I was quite surprised really. Me and Ryan go to theirs for our lunch on Sunday, and out with his mum once a fortnight for lunch/shopping. I guess it helps that I still get on well with Ryan's dad though.

I think you should just keep making it clear to them that they're welcome to see their grandchild. Maybe they're just a bit unsure about stepping on anyone's toes - whether yours or their son's? They might find it a bit easier once the baby is born, and realise what they're missing out on. x

 

[nikky0907]

Well actually in my case it's the other way around...

My parentsy want nothing to do with the baby but Nathan's parents are actually excited.This will be their first grandchild(they have 3 kids)...

I haven't met them seeing as they live in California but they will visit here I believe when the baby is born...It was a shock for them but they have definitely grown to it,they seem like great people...

I wouldn't deny Lola-Rose her grandparents because I grew up without them so I would definitely love it if she had at least one pair since my own parents don't want the role...

But it's your decision hun!

 

[~ Vicky ~]

Thats really sad, Amy. At least Lola-Rose will have some Grandparents though! Better than none at all.

I should be grateful really that my baby already has 4 doting Grandparents with my Mum and my Step-Dad, and my Dad and Step-Mum, but I want my baby to have the best of both worlds. I have absolutely nothing against Gav's parents which is why I want involvement from them for bubs sake. Gav has no siblings, so there won't be any aunts/uncles from his side, just my own two brothers.

I tried calling them when I had my scan to let them know everything is perfect, but they didn't give me chance to tell them. The minute they registered it was me on the other end of the phone they hung up. Its bizarre but another thing i'll just have to deal with I guess.

 

[Younglutonmum]

Im really not sure bout my in-laws to be honest with you girls.

When I fell pregnant his mum went crazy at me - told me she thinks im a gold digging slut & that I fell pregnant to trap him for his money. God he earns like 5p an hour at Primark hardly a rich man lol!!

Recently his mum saw me in the street & just blanked me. I was so pissed off considering she knew my nan had just passed away aswell!!

If my ex doesnt see the baby I dont think i'll be having the in-laws near her. How do you explain your nan wants to see you but not your dad??

And what if shes at her grandparents house & he's there? Who will they say he is? The plumber lol??!!

 

[~ Vicky ~]

Thats a good point actually...

 

[Younglutonmum]

I feel awful for making this decision but I just cant see them having acces actually working??

I worry it would confuse my daughter aswell - Nanny loves me but daddy doesnt sort of scenario? I think that could be potentially damaging for her

As ive said in previous posts i'd rather be able to explain why I made my decisions when she's older & can make her own life choices. Ive also got pleanty of family & friends who can also back up what i'll tell her so she never has to doubt what I tell her

xxx

 

[~ Vicky ~]

Ohh its so confusing.

I think what is bugging me more than anything is them completely ignoring me when i'm not the one in the wrong. Blah.

 

[Moulder86]

I got on with the ex in-laws and I still do I've already spoken to them about taking bubs round to see them when he's here and that sort of thing. I just hope that we stay on good terms.

 

[brownhairedmom]

There are two scenarios here:

#1: Adam's mother knew about the pregnancy and decided to ignore me and be a bitch. The baby will NOT be seeing its grandmother.

#2: Adam's a lying ******* and didn't tell his mother, and made up excuses so we would have no reason to come in contact with each other. In this case, I won't be punishing the poor woman for having an idiot of son who can't tell the truth, and I will be letting her see her grandchild when she chooses to(but not for her to take the baby and go with it for a few days)

 

[Younglutonmum]

I don't think my in-laws are even bothered about seeing the LO.

I tried to build up contact with his mum. I wrote her a big heartfelt letter saying I hope she wants to be involved, she's always welcome etc etc

But she choose to ignore that & since then so much has gone on I don't want that family near my LO!!

xxx

 

[xJG30]

Lewis's mum wants to play a part in the babies life and i'm not gonna stop her.. we still talk now and then (more than i talk to my ex)