In need of some encouragement

jlw617

Mom to 2 girls
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So I really want to have a natural hospital birth but as I get closer to the 3rd tri, Ive been starting to get really nervous about it especially because I experienced some really bad trauma to my urethra this past Monday when I went to the Hospital and a nurse either intentionally or negligently swabbed my urethra very forcefully and caused me to bleed for 3 days, the pain was excruciating and every time I went to the bathroom I cried, the thought that kept going through my mind was if I can barely handle this, how am I going to handle the pain of labor? My previous 2 labors I had epidurals with, however my last one was a little bit of a different kind, I could still feel my contractions, the very strong urge to push and pressure when my dd started to crown, I loved the feeling of being more in control of my body and of course from a more natural perspective, I don't want drugs that are going to cause side effects for me and baby...so with all that being said, I just need some encouraging words :winkwink:
 
Just in case it's not clear, she obviously was not supposed to swab my urethra, she was supposed to do a fetal fibronectin which is almost identical to a pap, she didn't use a speculum and did not go into my vaginal opening :shock:
 
Ooo, that makes me cringe! Poor you.

I have had health issues that meant I have dealt with a fair amount of chronic pain in my life. I wasn't too worried about coping with pain during labour. I just looked at it like something that had to be gotten through. What surprised me was how much I enjoyed labour. Yes it was painful but it wasn't like chronic pain or the pain when you are sick. There is a lot more*going on than just pain. There are so many hormones, adrenaline and excitement rushing about your body that its not like feeling sore and sorry for yourself like you are now. There are parts of labour that are harder to cope with than others and everyone has a different experience but you may be surprised by how well you cope with it.
 
That sounds terrible and painful. I hope you complained! That said, I wouldn't try to compare the pain of a medical procedure gone wrong with the experience of birth. I had a totally natural home birth (only pain relief I used was a TENS) and the only truly painful bits were the vaginal exam and getting stitches for my tear (didn't feel the tear, but the stitches sure as hell hurt!). Your body is made to give birth. It's not made to be subjected to painful medical procedures with no build up of your pain-relieving endorphins (which will happen in labour if you are comfortable, relaxed and not induced to bring on labour quickly before your pain relief hormones can respond). So really, I would try not to worry. I've had knee surgery and I've had a severe case of pneumonia that put me in hospital. Both were way, way more painful than having a natural birth, which was intense, but not overly painful. I would though really recommend doing some sort of hypnotherapy practice to prepare for birth. How we experience pain is 80% mental, so if you think it will be painful, it will be. If you can change the way your brain thinks of pain in labour, it will be much more manageable.
 
You poor thing :( I am sorry you had a traumatic experience at the hospital. Sounds like your nurse definitely didn't know what she was doing or hasn't had enough practice to be fully qualified.

I hope I can make you feel somewhat better. I've had two natural births in hospital. I am generally not great with pain and was nervous about this too. What's amazing in the birthing process is that the pain of labour is a natural progression (for most...unless you are one of those women who has super fast labours!) that starts out mild and slowly builds. This allows you the time to adjust to the pain that will slowly get stronger and stronger.

Staying calm and relaxed is also really important in order for your body to do what it needs to do. I used hypnobirthing and I HIGHLY recommend it! I used a cd because I couldn't afford classes and it works just as well. A calm mind means your labour will stay on track, not stall, and you'll feel pretty good once it's all over.

Just remember that your body is made for birthing. As mentioned previously, it's not made for surgery or painful procedures! You will do great!
 

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