Invite her or not?

[xCeex]

I have a 4D scan coming up, my mum and dad are paying because its my birthday present.

I don't know whether to invite MIL, I don't really want to. As she never puts towards anything, and I'll feel a bit unfair on my parents paying whilst she doesn't even pay for a picture. Never has either.

Shall I mention it, and see if she says anything or just leave it? She will think I've hid it on purpose.

She has been to all the others, so missing this one shouldn't be a big deal. But it will because my mum is going and she'll hate that.

 

[1liz9]

It's a birthday present. I think ivitimg her would take away from the nice thing your parents are doing for you. If you were paying then you would have to, but with this being a gift I think it would be inappropriate to share the moment.

 

[sjwebb]

Hmm...tough position, especially for your hubby cause I'm sure he wants his mother there but I agree, VERY unfair that she isn't helping paying for anything. I mean I would say no because this is YOUR PARENTS gift to YOU. I'm sure they want to share in something special with you, maybe if you have another ultrasound you can invite her then?

 

[Kristin52]

You need to do what makes you comfortable!
If you don't want her there, that's your choice. x

 

[Jaylynne]

You could say it was a surprise present. I wouldn't want anything ruining my scan experience. Even if you don't say it was a surprise, it's still a present from your parents to you so why is she involved in their present? Let her see the photos after.

 

[jenniferttc1]

If you don't want her there, then don't. Whatever makes you feel more comfortable. You can always say it was a suprise present, and you don't even have to mention your mom was there also, I don't think she has to know that.

 

[Noirin]

after u have it done make sure to fone her and invite her over to show her the pics of the wonderful SURPRISE scan ur parents had for u, the one u had no idea about until u got to the scan itself!! and arent the pics so cute? xxxxxxx

 

[Noirin]

or u could say only so many ppl were allowed in and since ur parents were payin obv it was gona be them but if she wants to pay for another 1 ull be hapy to go and she can come along

 

[victorial8]

I would agree with the others, it's a present for you from your parents, not her. I payed for my own scan and still only took my parents haha, but my MIL doesn't really care that much so makes it a bit easier for us. X

 

[xloulabellex]

I don't think they should have to share their prezzie for you, with her.

It's not fair on them, or you. She comes to all the others.. she can leave this one.

Say it was a surprise and your mum popped you in the car and drove you to suprise destination lol! xxx

 

[bumpbear]

Although I don't think whether she pays towards anything should have an involvement on whether you choose to share grandchild related things with her, given that its a gift from your folks, i think its fine to go with just the two of them. If she finds out you were fibbing about if being a surprise, that might hurt her though. Sometimes its best just to be honest.

 

[Cheshirista]

I wouldn't tell her you're going for it, then show her the picture and if she asks when/where/who etc, just say your parents took you for your birthday.

It's hard including everyone and she should respect that. If she makes a big deal just say "my parents wanted to take me for a special day for my birthday".