is it normal to feel this way?

[myangel167]

I was ntnp. But my husband and I sorta wanted to wait maybe another year or so. BUT we had the attitude of, "if it happens, it happens" (I guess thinking that it wouldnt happen, at least not right away)

So as of last night, I had 4 positive at home pg tests. I went in to the doc today, my urine was inconclusive. (Maybe I drank too much water?) and they gave me blood test. (I will get the results tomorrow)

SO....I'm 99.9% sure I'm pg. and even though for the past 2-3 years its been all I could think about, (I had baby fever to the max!) but now that its here, I'm terrified. I've been super emotional all day and last night I barely slept. I cried in front of my doctor and my MIL. (I'm not the type of person who would ever feel comfortable crying in front of someone)

I have this guilt feeling now, like why am I not happy/excited?! I know this is a blessing but I'm just so scared. and all of a sudden I feel like I'm not ready. Whenever I see ladies post their bfp its always such a happy exciting thing. and thats how I imagined it would be....but I'm not. I'm just nervous.

Can anyone relate?

 

[pinkcatgirl]

Can totally relate! Even though we were actively trying and had been planning to try then for a few years, my first thought on seeing the second line was "what the f#@k have I done?!".

I was over the moon but hadn't really ever appreciated just how much anxiety pregnancy brings... Though its nothing to worrying about a newborn baby, ha ha.

Am sure you will be fine

 

[myangel167]

thanks for your response. I'm having a hard time relaxing and just accepting this. I mean, it hasnt even been 24 hours yet. Im just super freaked out.

 

[TexAnn]

If you are anything like me, you might be freaked for a while!! You might be getting the hormone crazies hard. It doesn't help if your man is acting scared about the whole thing like mine is.

I found it helped to tell a couple close friends about the positive test, just so I had someone to talk it out with. One friend already has children, which made me feel calm because she verified that I am just a crazy preggo lady. The other pal is single, so it is foreign to her and she excitedly freaks out with me. You will need different perspectives bc you could have up to 20 emotional changes a day... maybe it was just me.

For a couple weeks after the test, I would think "I really wanted this?! Does HE really want this? Is this real?" and became anxious and questioned way too much.

I've had a hard time with hormone crazies so far. I only am at ten weeks, and just saw our baby on ultrasound a couple days ago, and am finally a little more at ease with the whole thing.

Good luck, lady!!

 

[hopeful2012]

I'm the same. My hubby is excited, but I'm over here worrying about bills, cars( my transmission went out a couple days ago and now I'm car shopping), that I was taking antidepressants, and that I just gave my sister ALL of my baby stuff. How I'm I gonna handle 2?

 

[MamaLa]

My boyfriend and I were having unprotected sex since probably august and I never been on BC we use to just use condoms. And we were totally thinking that if it happens it happens. Then in March the happened. I legit cried, I was nervous. I even cried during sex after we found out.

But as the pregnancy progressed I am getting more and more excited. I had my 13 week scan and I cant stop looking at the ultrasounds. Its just incredible. The only thing that makes me anxious is telling my job.. I just dont know how.

 

[mrs.humphreys]

It's totally normally, with my 3 sons I got caught on the pill with the 1st my & my hubby (boyfriend then) had only been together 6 months & we were only 18, massive shock & I cried on & off until I saw him on the scan & knew it was meant to be, the 2nd 2 I was just as shocked with being on the pill but I was like you "if it was meant to be it'll be" they're now 9, 7(tomorrow) & 3. Now with this pregnancy yes it was planned but getting a bfp last Monday was the biggest shock of my life, I really didn't expect it as we've been trying since nov with no luck but it still stresses you out, pregnancy can be the most wonderful thing to ever happen to you & motherhood is amazing but at the same time with all the crazy hormones going around your body it can also seem terrifying, try to relax you'll be fine xx

 

[BunnyN]

I was in total shock when I got my BFP last time. We had been married 10 years and I really wanted a baby but it had kind of been an accident too. I thought I would have danced and screamed but I just sat on the floor saying "what have I done!" over and over. I posted about it at the time and soooo many women had similar reactions, even ones who had been TTC for a long time. It took me a while to get used too the idea but I just love being a mum. LO is a year old and when I got my BFP yesterday this time I couldn't stop smiling and dancing .

 

[myangel167]

thanks ladies! it makes me feel better to know that I'm not alone in how I feel! I got my blood test confirmation this morning....and while I'm still shocked and scared, I'm a little more at ease.

I always imagined that once it happened I would feel this automatic connection with the growing baby, right from day one. I would just be overwhelmed with excitement and stuff, but I just feel tired, sorta of weak, and nervous. lol

 

[TexAnn]

Angel,
I thought the same; I thought it would be so natural and I'd be so understanding of the changes going on. It has been a wild ride so far!!
In a way, my baby has hijacked my emotions and body, and I'm just along for the ride. And the way it has been driving, it's no wonder I'm carsick all the time!!

 

[Mafi419]

I also believe that is normal. I was really TTC, and because I'm married to another woman, it took a lot of thinking, planning, charting and saving money to start TTC (we used frozen sperm). When I got the positive test I was over the moon, but I'm 7 weeks now and since I got my first positive and now, I doubted myself and our decision many times. There are times when I think everything is perfect and that I'm so lucky and happy for having this wonderful thing happening to me. But there are times when I just get overwhelmed with worries and I wonder if we did the right thing if it was the right time. Once I was so emotional that I talked to my grandmother about it, I told her I was feeling insecure about being pregnant because I was afraid I wasn't going to be a good patient mother, and that I was afraid I could accidentally hurt the baby (like let him/her fall on the floor, or something like that), and my grandmother was all "oh that's not normal, do you wish you haven't done it? That's not normal, no one feels that. When I was pregnant I never thought about that!" and I was so upset by what she said because my grandmother is like a mother to me, and I just felt she was saying that I was already being a bad mother for sharing my feelings. There are days when I think everything will work out just fine. I think that it's just the hormones talking.