I've just poured my heart out...

[peekaboo]

...to my mum.

Don't know why but feeling extra down today about the whole TTC thing.

I should feel ok as all the tests we've had so far have been fine, and going to see FS at the end of the month. Got a massive boost when DH's SA results came back good, and just thought 'sod it' and been BDing whenever we felt like it this month.

BUT, for some reason I feel so low today. Think I OV'd over the weekend and now I'm in the 2ww I know there's nothing else I can do this cycle.

So, just been having a chat with my mum on the phone and she asked why I sounded down so just told her everything. She knew we were TTC but that's all she knew. I've just told her about going for tests and that we've been referred to FS. She even said maybe we needed to 'be together' more (polite way of saying BDing more!!).

Feel better now that she knows everything and knows why I sometimes sound down. I think its sometimes good to get stuff of your chest and who better to speak to than mum?

Has anyone else felt like this and let it all out? x

 

[Kiki09]

I do exactly the same thing with my mum, she lives 176 miles away from me but always knows from my voice when I am "not right"! She is so positive and keeps telling me it will happen for us and those few words make me feel so much better!

 

[peekaboo]

My mum lives abroad so chat to her quite often and she too knows when I'm not right. Part of me didn't want to say anything but I'm glad I did now!

 

[Mrs G]

I felt alot better when I told my parents recently. I didn't realise how much I had been bottling up and hiding things. It does feel a little strange to be discussing cycles and ttc with your parents though....

Good luck hun
xx

 

[peekaboo]

Yeah it did feel a bit odd, especially as my mum was avoid the word 'sex' but referring to 'it'!! Very odd, but natural I guess. After all it's how we all got here! x

 

[urchin]

I'm feeling exactly the same today peekaboo - today is my first Peak on my CBFM and I think after last month's disappointment (when I got all excited over a late AF, which is never ever late!) I'm reluctant to scrape any more hope together ... I guess I'm just feeling like it's never going to happen for me.

And what really really doesn't help is anyone trying to reassure me with 'don't worry, you'll get your BFP soon'
Are they clairvoyant? can they see my future? can they guarantee me that?
no?
Well don't blummin say it then because not everyone gets there in the end and I may well turn out to be one of those women who doesn't

yup, I'm feeling thoroughly miserable today

 

[peekaboo]

Join the club, thats how I feel today.

Really trying to shake it off and think of all the good things I have, but still can't ever 'switch off' my TTC thoughts.

At least the sun's out - that's something to make me smile, if only for a few hours. x

 

[puppymom32]

I feel the same way had a break down with hubby last night. I think this TTC for so long may be given me depression. I am just so gutted when it doesnt work and honestly think I may be one of those people that never have children. When we got all of our test everything came back fine sometimes I think that is almost worse because at least if I knew what the problem was I could accept it or try and fix it the not knowing it what for me makes it the hardest.

 

[peekaboo]

I think sometimes it does us good (not good, but you know what I mean) to breakdown and pour everything out. Keeping it all inside can't be doing us any good. puppymom, I can only imagine how you must feel after five years, and it must be so difficult. I can really understand how TTC could cause depression in all honestly - in fact I find it hard to imagine it not doing. I also can understand what you mean about tests. If there's nothing wrong then why isn't it working? That's the million dollar question really isn't it. If only someone knew. I wish you all the luck in the world, and truly hope that you get there soon. x

 

[puppymom32]

thanks hunny you guys are way better and cheaper than a shrink. Hope u do too.