just being normally cautious or something else?

[keeks1987]

I need to know if this is normal, or if it's a form of PND.

I worry about Ethan all the time. But today it's more so.

He was sick for the first time today which can't have helped. But since I found out that Lancashire is one of the highest places for sids, midwife told me, I worry something is going to happen to Ethan. I understand that nothin will probably happen, but I worry that he's going to get sick because I've not done his bottles right, or that he's too hot or cold. I discovered that he was over heated after he was really cranky in Debenhams. I don't know why I didn't think to check him as it was so hot I had to take my coat off.

I came in from the bedroom and Ethan is in his bouncy chair sleeping. He had a strange look on his face and I decided to check his hands which were ice cold. So I panicked thinkin he was dead. Then Ethan murmured and moved. So he's just sleeping.

Mike thinks I'm just being paranoid. In my head I know that I need to worry less, but I just can't seem to be able to.

Is this normal? We lost so many babies before Ethan and I don't know what I'm doing at all. I constantly feel like I'm floundering.

So... any advice?

 

[aliss]

I don't think your behaviour is unusual at only 1 week particularly if you've suffered losses before. Yes, you're going to be so scared. Your confidence will get better with time as he gets older & more capable of expressing himself but until then, there's nothing wrong with checking, rechecking, checking, etc. if it makes you feel better.

 

[Lysal]

I was the same with lo. I kept waking up in the night and switching on the light or putting my hand on his chest to check he was still breathing. As he has got older I have calmed but I still worry and at times every worst case scenario runs through my head and I get myself worked up. I think we will always worry about them to a certain extent it comes with being a mum.

 

[Jazzy-NICU]

When my LO was a few days old I woke in the night and thought he had slept for 6hrs, I screamed to OH to wake up as it wasn't normal and LO must be dead , I grabbed him up out of the crib with my OH very calmly telling be i had fed him 2hrs before!! It's totally normal to worry!

 

[babypowder]

I agree, on the side of normal though a rather intense version of normal for you. It WILL get easier, I still check my LO a lot but your confidence will grow. No amount of people telling you it's normal will help though so if you think you'd benefit from some reassurance there is no harm in speaking to your doctor.

Hugs for you xx

 

[Lauki]

I was exactly like this, checking Soph every time if she was still breathing and everything!
Don't worry about the cold hands, this is completely normal !
You're not being silly, just protective!!

 

[sapphire1]

I do think it's normal, especially as you've suffered losses before. I used to panic all the time about Holly, but I've found it lessened as she got older. I rarely worry now, even now she sleeps on her front - I would have had heart failure over that in the past. If you continue to worry, and it starts to get worse, it might be worth talking to your HV. They may be able to offer advice and support. x x

 

[Chocoholic123]

Sounds normal to me. I'm constantly checking he's still breathing. We have the angelcare monitor in the cot so I'm comforted that will sound the alarm if something happened but when he's sleeping in the carseat or pram I'm constantly checking he's still breathing and worry he will overheat.

 

[Emsbambino]

I think it's totally normal, I was told during my pregnancy that you will always worry about them no matter how young or old they are there will always be something.
I live in Lancs - where abouts are you?

 

[bunnyg82]

It is normal to be worried. I have not stopped worrying about him! We use a movement monitor and I have to have that on every time he goes to sleep as I am so paranoid.

I do know some people that are very care free and don't worry about anything like this, but most of the people I know do worry.

 

[keeks1987]

Thank you all so much. I feel so much better now bout it. I'm sure it'll get better as my confidence grows.

I live in Bolton. Where'd you live?

 

[Babushka99]

Congratulations on your baby Don't worry this is normal it does ease off a bit as lo gets older. xxx

 

[Emsbambino]

Ooh not too far - Blackburn

 

[Cattia]

Yep, it is normal. I worried non stop with my daughter. The worry is still there with my son but is a little less intense. I would be lost without my Angelcare monitor though. I even take it and use it with the travel cot if we are away.

 

[starlight2801]

I think it's normal in the early days too, I was certainly how you describe. We love our babies so much and they seem so tiny and vulnerable.

I still have the odd panic now but hardly ever. Honestly your confidence does grow as time goes on.

If you don't have one already the Angelcare Movement and Sound monitor helped me more than I could have ever imagined. Once it was installed I could sleep peacefully as I stopped waking up in a panic to check on my LO. I really couldn't recommend it enough.