LO suddenly going from loving nursery to hating it :(

Discussion in 'Toddler & Pre-School' started by BethK, Nov 15, 2011.

  1. BethK

    BethK Well-Known Member

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    Has anyone elses LO done this?

    Freya's not ill, nor is she teething, she's not tired either but it's the second day in a row where she's cried when i've left her at nursery.

    She's happy to walk there from the car and smiles for the staff when she arrives. She runs straight to the baby room door but once she's in she reaches for me and cries her heart out :(

    The girls at nursery say there's no issue once i've gone, they calm her down and she's ok. I hope they're being honest and she's not sad all day.

    Anyone elses go from loving nursery, almost closing the door in your face when you leave to hating seeing you go?

    Please tell me it doesn't last.
     
  2. MrsT2B

    MrsT2B Well-Known Member

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    Yes mine!

    My LO went to nursery at 9 months old and loved it from day 1! We never had tears, the staff always commented on what a happy little boy he was.

    Suddenly around 18 months he started crying when I left, and I mean sobbing, it was awful! I couldnt understand why as like your LO, he would run in, be all smiles but the minute I turned to go he got hysterical.

    I asked a lot of people and on here and also did my own investigating! I found out that the 2 main times babies/tofflers experience seperation anxiety is around 9 months and 18 months.

    I could only put it down to this ans just persevered with telling him what was happening and that mummy would always come back etc. It passed within about a month if I remember right.

    Its hard I know but it probably is just a phase and persevering with the same routine and constant reassurance should see it pass quickly!

    Hope that helps

    xxx
     
  3. isil

    isil Well-Known Member

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    I agree with MrsT2B - my son was attending nursery around 12 months and went fine and settled in but we went through a very difficult stage at around 16/17 months with him.
     
  4. Lellow

    Lellow Déjà poo ... Get it?

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    Oh Beth i couldve written this myself.
    Aymens been going since Jan and hes been fine up til now, but over the past couple of weeks, DH has said hes left him there crying :cry:
    Ive no idea why hes started to dislike it so much when he first gets there.
    I have to say tho, that once hes been there a few minutes and DH is out of sight, hes back to his usual self and enjoys it as he usually did.
     
  5. BethK

    BethK Well-Known Member

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    Thank you so much! Glad to hear it will pass, i'm sure i can last a month.

    Poor little Monkey :(
     
  6. MrsT2B

    MrsT2B Well-Known Member

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    Its awful isnt it! I got myself in a right state and was adamant I was giving up work! My nursery were fab and rang me a couple of times in the day to let me know he was ok, think they could see I needed the reassurance more than LO! :haha:

    If it will help you feel better maybe ask them to?

    Hugs as I know its hard but it will pass

    xx
     
  7. BethK

    BethK Well-Known Member

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    Awww :( Hope your LO gets over it soon! good to hear he's back to his usual self quickly, maybe i will hide behind the door tomorrow and see that she's ok :)
     
  8. v2007

    v2007 Well-Known Member

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    Arrrr Katie has been like this.

    She loved it up until the half term and the 1st session back, i had to go back and get her because she was in a right state.

    Now i have got brutal and i take her, give her a :kiss: and say bye.

    I know that sounds harsh but it cost's me a fortune to send her.

    V xxx
     
  9. Kte

    Kte Mummy to Chloe & Sophie

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    Yep Chloe - although she has just changed rooms so I'm thinking (hoping) she will settle down again eventually. Today she was actually fine and gave her keyworker a cuddle which made my heart melt.

    Mostly I give her a quick hug and kiss, wave and say bye-bye and leave as soon as I can . . . because I know she will be fine once I am gone, its just whilst she can see me! We get lots of pictures and they take photographs so I can see they aren't lieing to me about how happy she is. I am pretty sure its 'just a phase' all LO's go through. :flower:
     
  10. Mum2b_Claire

    Mum2b_Claire Mummy to Ruby & Scarlett!

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    I've definitely heard this is a common thing to happen. Hope it doesn't last for you! Is there anything worse than leaving a crying child at the nursery :( one of the hardest mummy jobs I'm sure.
     
  11. Eala

    Eala Mum of two gorgeous girls

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    Roo adores nursery (sometimes she cries when I pick her up because she doesn't want to leave :blush:) but she still goes through phases like this. Usually they only last about a week for her. If I've left her upset, then I always call them to see if she has settled, and she always has. My nursery are starting a text update service too, so I'll hear by text that she's settled if she was upset at us leaving :)

    I do find that if I linger too long, it can trigger meltdown. Yesterday her keyworker was talking to me about my pregnancy and my husband being away at the moment. Roo had toddled straight off to get a book and barely even waved bye-bye to me, initially. Then she looked up, saw me, and came running up all upset. I just gave her a kiss and said bye-bye again, and her keyworker took her to get breakfast. By the time I got around the corner, she was fine again. One of the ladies in the big room looked over and reported that she was already tucking into weetabix before I'd even gotten to the door :blush:

    It is one of the worst feelings in the world when you have to walk away as they cry, but I try to tell myself that I know if she wasn't settling, they would call me. And that, at the end of the day, in our situation, childcare of some kind is necessary; being a SAHM isn't an option. And I know she loves it really :)
     
  12. hattiehippo

    hattiehippo Well-Known Member

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    Tom's just come out of a phase like this - he started nusery at 8 months old and we never ever had a problem dropping him off until suddenly at 21 months he started screaming and clinging to me. A number of times I had to hand him over and just walk out and listen to him screaming all the way to the car. Then I'd call them 10 mins later and he was happily eating breakfast like nothing had happened!

    I found it really helped making a game of handing him over by swinging him and going 1,2,3 off you go and also the nursery were great and his favourite lady would be there to take him every time. These together seemed to gradually help him move past being clingy and at the mo he just wants to run off and play with the toys again.
     

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