Long Long Long timers.....

[NeyNey]

I dunno, I guess after almost 4 years of this stuff I am finding that the stress levels with TTC have decreased (for the most part). I am beginning to temp and chart again after a long break. But I don't seem to stress over the little things that use to have me in a knot.

In fact, in a complete 180 TTC has taken on a more exciting and relaxed tone once again, kind of like when we first began.

Anyone else experience this?

It really has become a joy again...for the most part, of course it still comes with it's regular frustrations, and my Gyno doesn't help matters as he's useless, but once he's done this Laproscopy in August I'm moving onto a Fertility Clinic where I can get more professional help, and being IVF...

anyway, just wanted to see if perhaps the whole laid back attitude comes full circle after a long time TTC?

 

[Mynxie]

Not sure TBH hun, for a while now we've took the attitude of "not trying, not preventing" cause for us now, there's no point getting all worked up. We're pretty much on our own.

 

[hopeful4baby]

I agree, Ney Ney. It has been over 3 years of TTC for us. My DH definitely thinks I've relaxed a lot. Mind you, this is our first cycle with some sort of help, perhaps the hope has returned seeing so many girls falling and staying pregnant on clomid.

But I used to fret like crazy just before ovulation, I almost went to panic stage. I used to burst into tears thinking what was the point of BD anyway. Everyone around was falling pregnant, giving birth and I used to think I'll never catch up with them. Somehow I don't care so much. I'm beginning to accept we are different, we are having it lot tougher.

Now I've started charting again and using OPKs after a year just before this clomid cycle out of curiosity what happens and BD has become fun again, if not better and more intense, because I realize how lucky I am having my DH.

 

[jonnanne3]

I agree. Now we haven't been TTC as long as some of the ladies on here. But I am over 2 years TTC with short tubes (2.5 cm right and 3.0 cm on left) and 3 miscarrages. I think over the past 3 or 4 months I don't feel like I have been "stressing" over it now. I am just trying to get my life back to normal. Not that it isn't still in the back of my head, just not revolving my life around it. I still watch what I take as far as meds, but other than that.....nothing else. I have rather enjoyed it. Enjoyed my husband too!

 

[Redfraggle]

I find it comes and goes. Sometimes I'll be happily plodding along just seeing what happens and then bam, I get completely stressed and obsessed again. Normally when someone close anounces a pregnancy or something and then after a couple months I give up stressing and chill out again.

 

[x_Rainbow_x]

nope the fun has well and truely gone and it wont come back i no that for a fact.

 

[Farie]

Hey honey

I'm my case I think it does a little, I still get stressed and upset, but not in the way I used to, I don't get frantic, if we don't dtd quite on the right day its not the end of the world. I use my CBFM but only on and off ...

We laugh about it all more, I don't get quite so upset every month
TBH its better like this, a sort of resigned calm, at least I'm not always screwed up with worry.

 

[NeyNey]

I feel the same, I find when we do the HPT of course it's a let down when it's a negative, but I kind of expect it so much now that I'm immune to the feeling?

I tell you when, when I get that BFP I'll probably fall off the chair!

 

[Farie]

I know! I'll probably need CPR!!!

 

[maz]

We'll be 5 years TTC on 1st October and up until we started IVF it was stressful, frustrating, and downright depressing, but since our IVF cycles I don't seem as worried about the whole TTC thing.

I'm temping and using my CBFM again for the first time this month, and TBH if it happens it happens for me now - the most stressful thing at the moment is remembering how temping and CBFM works and what it means. I think for us, because we've been trying so long - and even though we are in that bloody annoying 'unexplained' bracket - we are a bit like you NeyNey - immune to the (unless it's after IVF) and if it did happen naturally I think I would collapse in a heap on the floor ... It's not that having a family means any less to us than when we first started - in fact, I'd say it means more now than ever - I think it's just that the excitement, the hope, it's all pretty much gone for us now ...

 

[JASMAK]

Comes and goes for me. I guess for awhile there I knew it WASN'T going to happen, so I was more laid-back - although part of me always hoped that it would happen. I think the counselling that I got for four months really helped too.

 

[jacky24]

Ye i have also noticed i don't get all tense and exited when im late... I refuse to buy a HPT unless i am atleast 1month late....
But last night me and OH had some fun and he said can't we start practicing again... and i said... HELL NO.. im losing weight now with my new meds so you can wait now... WTF total mind change for me at the moment...

So am going with the *WHAT HAPPENS WILL HAPPEN* attitude.....

 

[Ash_P]

Jackie, I think thats the best type of attitude. I think if we obsess over it and turn into robots over it, its pretty much a cert that it wont happen. We put our bodys under too much mental stress and make things worse.
I`m telling myself, If its meant for us, it wont pass us. It`ll just happen when the time is right.

 

[MissAma]

I just posted over here today after a long time and realized how much my attitude has changed. A few years ago a post on BnB -and yeah, before time when this place was vastly different- would be the highlight of my day, my life would revolve around TTC (heck NeyNey, I remember one morning I got to work and you were not on MSN and I literary sat there counting the moments before you could come online and I could ask you something that seemed crucial - what type of oil/PreSeed/maka or whatnot to buy for the next cycle!), POASing on one thing or the other, obsessing at every step and wondering how anyone can consider anything other. I'd occasionally read posts from people saying they want to now travel or focus on their careers or have fun for a while and get off TTC and think there must be something wrong with them.

That surely that baby doesn't come first to them as it did to me. Couldn't comprehend it. Guess life/God had a lesson to teach me about intolerance and I am now in their shoes. With our next IVF try being that far in the future, I don't panic I'm over 30 and infertile anymore, I'm focusing on myself more than ever before in my long long TTC journey. I've stopped smoking, am building a better body than I've ever had, working on my career and on my relationship and when we do have non-intentionally-TTC it's darn good. Of course in the back of my mind I am still hoping for a miracle, who isn't, but overall, spot on NeyNey, LLLTTTCing is far more relaxed after a few years