Looking on the bright side

[born2bamama]

So after a few successful months of preoccupying myself and not obsessing over ttc.. I lately have been refocused on it due to upcoming appts and holidays, etc. Anyway, in a desperate attempt not to fall into a depression and to stay positive for the year ahead I've been trying to look on the bright side and thought I'd share with you girls.

I thought it would be a good idea to think about all the good that has come from our LTTC journeys so far. Things that have happened directly due to our lttc journey as well as things that have changed since beginning ttc that will now make you even happier or more prepared for that bfp when it happens. Obviously, we all would have preferred a bfp ages ago, but I thought since we have had to wait.. might as well identify some things to be happy about..

So here's my list (in no particular order) and I hope you all can contribute too!

1. We bought a house
2. Almost done paying off school debt (we joke that our baby is waiting for us to be debt free because it has expensive taste )
3. We are closer and stronger as a couple; communication is better, more mature, and all that good stuff
4. We want a family THAT much more now, and I feel this will make us more appreciative when we get to be parents
5. Hubby has a better job that he actually enjoys


Hope you all can think of some good that has come out of this hellish time too! Looking forward to hearing from you, and a happy new year to all! 2013 WILL BE OUR YEAR!!!

 

[born2bamama]

Oh i thought of another one too... getting over my fear of swallowing pills and now can swallow the big vitamins whole small achievement but is much more convenient! hoping it will come in handy when i start treatments too!

 

[McIreland]

It's hard to think of positives about LTTC... but...

1. I do look at my many, many, friends who had unplanned pregnancies and think that I'll be soooo grateful when I'm finally pregnant and cherish every moment. A lot of them see their children as burdens, or complain about all they had to sacrifice.

2. Realizing that my OH must really love me to stick around, keep trying, and never give up hope (even though I have several times!)

But enough of that, can we just get pregnant already? lol

 

[wellsk]

I saw a thread like this from a few years back. I thought it was a really good idea, as often we're so wrapped up in getting that BFP that I think we forget what other things we have achieved!

1. DH got a promotion, okay; he would've probably got it anyway. But we've been able to focus on that and when we do get pregnant we won't have the money worries we would've had if we'd gotten pregnant right away.

2. Save up enough money for a little one. Hopefully we would've done this anyway, but as long as we're not getting pregnant. The more we'll be able to buy when they are here.

3. Completing my degree without the worries of looking after a baby. Hopefully that means a higher grade

4. Being able to appreciate pregnancy and all it's ups and downs. Knowing its what we've wanted and waited for. I think that LTTTC makes you a lot more humble and grateful for how precious children are.

 

[Mump_hopeful]

hiya ladies,

i saw this, loved it and had to be part of it as over the last 2year i must admit now i was obsessing about geting BFP...

1) we have moved out of his parents! (thanking my stars!!!)
2) we both have jobs be love and our wages have doubled since we started TTC
3) we have savings! ready to cushion us when BFP decides to make an apperence
4) WE GOT MARRIED
5) we have been on holidays (hubs would let us TTC stand in the way of the sun!)
6) were sooooo close - hes my bestie
7) iv spoken to some really lovely and inspirational ladies and gents on here - its replaced my FB addiction!

love you and and wish a BFP soon to you all

 

[foquita]

I love this thread! love reading everyone's positives here are mine:

1. I went back to uni to do another degree in something I love. I was hoping to put it off because of pregnancy, and go once baby was born but I'm really thankful now that I've got to start and that I'll have at least a few years of it under my belt (two years/half way through if ICSI works first or second time in 2014)

2. our relationship is so much stronger because of everything we have been through together and we are so devoted to each other. I hope the hard path we have been done has cemented us together enough for sleepless nights and baby troubles to not drive us apart when/if the time comes

3. we were both at risk of redundancy (I lost my job and he kept his) and it would have been so much scarier if I was expecting or we had a child.

4. I got a new, better paid job which wouldn't have happened had I been pregnant/a mum

5. we have loads of savings and financially things are going pretty well

 

[born2bamama]

Thank you girls!! So glad to see people contributing to this thread and thinking of some positives It makes me happy that we can devote some time to thinking of some benefits to having to wait longer, and of course the most important thing is probably (like everyone has mentioned) how much we will appreciate our children and the love, patience, and everything that we will have for them due to the struggle we are going through now.
Keep up the positive thinking and all the best for 2013!

 

[MrsBroodyPant]

Hi, i like this thread.

1. We have a bit if debt (not much) but having to wait for that bfp means we are getting closer to becoming debt free.
2. We moved house before ttc & now we have had chance to get a new kitchen & decorate.
3. We will be eternally grateful when we finally do have children and appreciate them more.
4. Now friends and family members have already had their children, we will have the youngest and cutest ones!!
5. We have still got that special moment of getting our first bfp to look forward to

Good luck everyone. We all deserve this soooo much xxx

 

[ChartsNHearts]

Since we started TTC...

1. We have moved house to be closer to my parents, which will be great *when* we get our baby as they can be hands-on grandparents

2. My hubby has really come around to the idea of being a parent & has had the chance to get lots of practice of playing with our friends & family members' children

3. We will both really really appreciate that BFP when we finally see it & I'll be so relieved to be pregnant that I don't think I'll even mind morning sickness etc.!

Great reasons to be positive! Thanks for starting this thread!

 

[Galaxy Girl]

Aww this thread has made me smile such a lovely idea

Mine are:

-We moved house and made it into a home
-We got our 2 furbabies
-We have got more savings
-We are more in love than ever

Me and DH both take each month as it comes and of course we get upset when AF arrives but we are strong believers that everything happens for a reason!

Baby dust to you all

 

[pcsoph2890]

love this too:-
1. Got sideways moved into a job which i ultimately wanted.
2. We have travelled a bit and grown as a couple
3. Saved more money
4. Sold our house yesterday and now looking for our new family house
5. Become very atuned to my own body
6. Seeing my husband interact with families children and knowing he'll make a wonderful father
7. Just being generally happy within ourselves

 

[jcr1988]

you ladies have brightened my day!

*thankful that we were able to buy and completely redo a house
*got our lovely giant fur baby
*were able to up and go whenever we want
*Im able to further my career in the time being (hairdressing)
*We can still go out and party with our friends when we want to
*We're going to appreciate our BFP, pregnancy and children so much more (when that happens)
*we're able to pay off debt easier
*I can still fit into all my clothes!
*we get to sleep lots still!

I make it a point to find the positive side in everything in life no matter how bad it may seem, there is always a bright side to it all

 

[foquita]

we should try and keep the thread going, optimists sticking together

 

[born2bamama]

we should try and keep the thread going, optimists sticking together

I love that idea, let's keep up the positive thinking and trying to focus on the good!

I've been going crazy lately because I have those appts at the end of the month and I just can't wait to find out what is next... soooo in order to stop from going completely insane I've been thinking about anything and everything I would want to have in place/etc once a baby comes so I've been making lists (I'm a total list person) of things to keep me occupied and work towards those goals.. obviously I won't be making/buying baby things because that's too hard, but here is what I've been working on/plan to do:

1. Organize everything! (house, finances/file papers, budget, etc)
2. Get on a cleaning schedule
3. Save more money (ongoing of course, but keeps me motivated to work my second job )
4. Get organized with grocery budget/supper ideas- currently learning and getting into the habit of pre-preparing meals and "freezer cooking".
5. Ideas for saving money (with groceries, lifestyle, etc).
6. Doing house projects (fixing railing, etc)
7. Organizing ideas for the future: keeping a binder for activity ideas (for diff ages of kids), family ideas (movie night, etc), parenting advice (how to do a timeout, etc), and ideas on teaching kids diff. things (about money, generousity, etc). I haven't started this yet- unless you count a board on Pinterest but I'm excited to do because I figure I won't have as much time when there is a toddler around and this will make me much more prepared and able to do these ideas when the busy time comes!

I hope this can inspire you guys to maybe think of some things, and I'd also love to hear any ideas you guys are working on too! I figure we can't do much about the situation we are in now, so might as well use the time to make the future even better!

 

[foquita]

I'm a list person too!! I made one of these lists a while ago but I've stopped thinking about ever actually having a baby, I think I'll start again though I'll do an updated list and post it

I love your list, and I think just about everything on it matches what my list will be like

so what appointments do you have? have you had any tests, treatment, etc already?

I'm a wee bit emotional today, not for any reason - I think it might be hormones! but when I feel like that my optimism definitely wavers so this thread will be my first port of call in those times

optimists unite

 

[born2bamama]

Hey Foquita!
List people are awesome! I'll be happy to read yours once you update it - I think I make like a copy every day while day dreaming at work

We have been TTC for 2 years; had blood tests day 21 and day 3, sa, and hsg - all clear. We have our first appointment with the hospital on Jan 29 and a follow up with the private clinic on Jan 30 (they are the ones who have ordered the tests). Looking forward to what is next; hoping that I get something to try because I'm tired of just waiting around for more tests...hence the lists

Wishing you lots of baby dust and positive thinking!

 

[Godzuki]

Born2bamama you are brilliant (and so are lists, couldn't organise a thing without one).

I was just about to write a post moaning about so many people having babies and getting pregnant around me (made worse by visiting a museum today surrounded by babies and youngsters). But change of plan I'm not going to write that post now!!

Instead I've got renewed optimism! I'm going to write myself a list full of great stuff to do and ways to remember all the good times that we've have happened throughout the bad whilst we've been ttc.

My list of good stuff includes:
*Spending a day off work with my hubby and thinking about how much I love spending time with him.
*Having various anniversaries to celebrate in the next few months.
*We had a really great holiday last year.
*Apart from ttc problems we are healthy and happy.
*We got 2 kittens last year which is a start to building our family.

All you guys rock and I hope with all my heart you get your bfp very soon. xxx

 

[Miss_Awesome]

1. In just six months, we'll be able to leave this city that we can't stand. We don't know where we're going to go just yet, but neither of us has liked it here since our parents moved us here over a decade ago each.

2. The fistful of pills I've started taking continues to grow and has yet to equal a BFP, but I'm thankful that it's made my periods spot on. Seriously, since October, they've been on either the 8th or 9th of the month. This is a huge deal since my periods were so scattered since 2011.

3. I'm thankful that my ultrasound in July showed no major things to worry about. I only heard that it was "normal," but I'll take it!

4. DH got promoted in December and along with that came a raise. Another raise will take effect for him in March.

5. We moved across town last month to an apartment. It happens to be right near the gym I have a membership at. No more excuses!

6. My DH told me today that he finally caved to my pleading and arranged to have a semen analysis. I swear it was like he told me Santa is actually real because I couldn't contain my excitement. I'm nervous as to what they will or won't tell us, but this is a big victory for me and will finally allow me to either move on and get more testing on myself done or to move on by accepting we're infertile and pursue other avenues.

 

[born2bamama]

Hey Godzuka!
I'm so glad you enjoy the thread- it made me really happy to read that I might have been able to improve your outlook the other night. I know it's hard to be positive but forcing yourself to think about good things definitely seems to help

Hey Miss Awesome- glad that you were able to contribute too! And I know what you mean about the SA- my hubby JUST had his done (after 2 years of ttc); he told me all along that it was "obviously" him and was so convinced he was down about it all the time... and lo and behold he actually had zero problems. The hardest part was getting him to actually go forward with it so congrats on finally getting over that hurdle!

 

[Godzuki]

Back for a dose of optimism. We were out at the weekend and lots of friends were asking if we were trying, it was strange that after nearly 3 years of marriage they all asked on same night. Also had sad news about people close to us who are ttc, want so much for it to work for them. It must have gotten too much for me cause I ended up in tears this afternoon in front of my manager, poor bloke, he's been really great this last year.

But enough of that, good things atm are that:

*The hospital that have been a bit rubbish seem to be a bit better and I didn't have to badger them for an appt following my lap and dye (in Feb).
*It's been snowing which made things all pretty this morning.
*We've got curry for dinner tonight!
*And this week is prime time for lots of

Off to do the now before hubby comes home.