Male factor dilemma - repeated losses

[Sweetkat]

My OH has high DNA fragmentation and I have had 3 miscarriages between 8-10 weeks and one chemical. I have had every test under the sun and nothing found apart from slightly elevated NK cells. However all our miscarriages were due to chromosomal issues. OH had numerous fragmentation tests and it ranges from 44-51%.

Anything over 25 percent is higher risk of miscarriage, anything over 50 percent fragmentation is high risk of miscarriage. We were offered ivf with icsi with Imsi with Pgd. This might help.

I am so torn . Terrified of another miscarriage and also terrified ivf doesn't work. I am almost 37 and have not even tried for the last year as was having tests and then OH was on vitamins (although we did have a chemical in December).

It's sooooo hard to make a decison.

Options are TTC naturally
Donor sperm
IVF with PGD

I can't think or talk about anything else. My OH and my mum hear about nothing else. I change my mind daily.

My period is due any day and we have already had most preliminary tests for IvF (scans, hormone tests etc). So in 2 weeks I can either try naturally (and fall pregnant first or second try every time) or try IVF.

My chance of miscarriage by trying naturally is around 60%. Chances of ICSI with IMSI succeeding is around 30% and 20% chance of miscarriage.

I have seen 3 different consultants and they all said if we carry on trying out of ten tries at least 2 or 3 should statistically be fine. But with icsi and inside and PhD they only transfer chromosonally normal embryos.

Other thing is - I know people who have been doing IVF for 7 months and have cysts so have had to wait for months for them to go. I had 3 natural pregnancies in 9 months to 8,8 and 10 weeks
(fell pregnant first or second cycle after every miscarriage).

Any thoughts much appreciated

 

[karoolia]

What a difficult situation. I am so sorry you have to go through this. I honestly don't know what I would do in this situation. I think I would be very tempted to try the IFV, but I'm not sure I would choose it just yet, although given your age maybe that would change things.

I wish I could be of more help, I just wanted to offer some support.

 

[Fit_Mama2Be]

What a dilemma, I can understand why you're having trouble making a decision.

Out of my four pregnancies 3 have ended in losses, but DH and I aren't being tested for another month so we don't know if there is a cause yet. I just turned 37 and like you I get pregnant very easily. Neither my midwives or my gynocologist were concerned about my age, and because I get pregnant so easily my gyno's advice was to just keep getting pregnant until I get a healthy embryo. He didn't think there was any need to try anything else.

Having a miscarriage, never mind multiple ones, is so so hard. When I lost my first baby at 15 weeks I thought it would kill me too. I was incredibly distraught and ended up going to counselling. So I can totally see why you'd consider IVF in the hopes of not having another loss. But on the other hand I have a friend who had her first round of IVF not succeed and she was just as devestated as I was over my loss and also ended up going to counselling.

I guess it comes down to, worst case scenario, what would be harder for you to cope with - another or more losses, or going through IVF and then having it not work? I really, really hope it doesn't come to that though and that whatever decision you make leads to you getting your rainbow ASAP.

 

[Sweetkat]

Thank you so much for your responses.

I have had 3 miscarriages and one chemical. If every loss was a chemical or at 4/5 weeks I would have been able to cope better. But the last one I went for a scan at 8 weeks and it was perfect. And then at 10 & 2 was told no heartbeat and the consultant who scanned me suspected Down's straight away and that was confirmed with genetic testing. What's odd is that we had karyotype testing and there is no genetic reason for it and the chance of having a downs baby at my age is like 0.1% and also it doesn't normally lead to miscarriage!

By the time i had the D&C i was at what would have been 11 weeks and ironically on the day of my bloods and a few days before my 12 week scan. That was just awful

Now I think maybe I shouldn't have wasted time on testing as we always knew OH has sperm issues as he is on strong medication. If IVF didn't work what would worry me is being pumped full of hormones, having surgery to retrieve the eggs, messing up my cycles and spending a fortune possibly for not even getting pregnant! And also with the PgD it's going to take until August/September for frozen embryo transfer, whereas I could have unprotected sex and a possible pregnancy at the beginning of June. Although by end July I could be having another D&C

It's an awful choice to make.... baby dust to everyone and lots of rainbows.

 

[Sweetkat]

So my first prediction did come true - I had sex twice and I did get a bfp on 9 June

Keeping everything crossed that I don't end up having a miscarriage in July! That really would be awful. Keep your fingers crossed for me ladies....

6&5 today and feeling sick as I type. Although that doesn't mean the embryo is chromosomally normal. I have even been waking up in the middle of the night feeling nauseous. Hoping there is a baby and not a miscarriage in the end .

 

[Sweetkat]

I am 6&6 today and have decided to go for an early scan. If everything is already going wrong at least I will know and can opt for medical management rather than surgery.

Keep your fingers crossed for me ladies

 

[Sweetkat]

Just had a scan - measuring a day ahead - 7 weeks. Heartbeat of 138. Going back for a rescan in a week.

Feeling a little bit more hopeful but still expecting things to go bad.

 

[kcmb0886]

Wishing you the best! I really hope this will be your Rainbow, Sweetkat!

 

[Sweetkat]

Thank you kcmb - 7 weeks today and keeping everything crossed...

 

[mimi4]

sweetkat- great news, congrats! Two friends of mine were in the same situation. One lady conceived naturally, the second one via IVF with PGS NGS. All the best

 

[Sweetkat]

Still here. 8&1 and everything seems ok so far, but very paranoid about chromosomal issues with the baby. Can have a panorama test in a week.