Matthew John or Joshua Michael?

katherinegrey

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I was pretty set this baby would be named Matthew, but for some odd reason last week I had a wobble on it and now I'm unsure, so I've been searching for a back up, so that if I have the baby and decide Matthew doesn't fit, I'd have a plan B.
I hadn't mentioned my wobble to DH at all until last night, and then I asked him what he thought of reconsidering Matthew, he asked me what I had in mind, and I told him that Matthew is probably still top of my list, but did he like Joshua Michael as an alternative? He told me he really liked it, and he thinks he prefers it to Matthew at all!
Our first son is called Jamie Christopher, my dad is named Christopher, so the middle name was to honour him really. When we found out we were expecting our second boy, DH said he'd like to honour his father and use Michael as a middle name, however, as I was set on Matthew, I told him it didn't go and that was that, however, I'd be happy to use his fathers middle name of John. DH is much happier that we could use his fathers first name after all.
The only thing with Joshua is our best friend committed suicide nearly three years ago who was called Josh. DH would have liked our first son to be called Josh, but I said it was far too raw at the time, and given that he took his own life and left everyone devastated and confused, I didn't want our new innocent baby to be associated with that if it makes sense? Having suffered with mental illness myself, I just felt incredibly sad he got to this point when he had so many who loved him and had no idea he was struggling, but I know DH was left feeling very angry at him and still finds talking about him painful, which I know is a perfectly normal response in these circumstances. I'm still unsure I want my innocent baby associated with that anger and pain, again, if that makes sense?

Given all this, what name would you use?? Thank you
 
They are my 2 fave names :) but I love Matthew. Its my sons name and is lovely for baby or adult x
 
I like Joshua Matthew or Matthew Joshua! Seems like a fair compromise. Not a Michael or John fan.
 
Personally I prefer Josh. I understand the sad connection but for me it would make it a "happy" name for everyone again... Otherwise why not have 2 middle names
Matthew Joshua Michael xxxxx works too :)
 
I like Joshua Michael. Joshua is one of my favourite names. :)
 
Ahem... We have very similar tastes my dear ;) I shall leave it at that!!!
 
I'm also on the Joshua Michael side, I think it's lovely and flows a lot better. For the connotation that may be associated with it, I think that no one will connect the suicide except that it was lovely for you to honor your dear friend with.
 
Thank you everyone for your help, I really liked the suggestion of maybe going with Matthew Joshua Michael, DH has two middle names so that is definitely an option I hadn't considered. I'm not a huge fan of either Michael or John to be perfectly honest, but as they're to honour my FIL, I have to include one of them to be fair as we did honour my own father with our first son, I feel it's only fair.


Ahem... We have very similar tastes my dear ;) I shall leave it at that!!!

We obviously both have exceptional taste ;) :haha: I notice your sig says about a section booked?! Did your placenta not move then? Little jealous of you having an exact date to meet your little man though! :flower:
 
Ahem... We have very similar tastes my dear ;) I shall leave it at that!!!

We obviously both have exceptional taste ;) :haha: I notice your sig says about a section booked?! Did your placenta not move then? Little jealous of you having an exact date to meet your little man though! :flower:

:winkwink:

I really need to update my journal! No, sadly my placenta has not moved (in fact it is worse) so I am provisionally booked in for a section at the end of October. It is now suddenly VERY real and all systems are go!!
 

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