Mental Illness anyone?

[Opheliac]

Can I ask you girls who went to therapy what kind of issues you discuss and how it gets resolved? i know this is a very personal question so please ignore or PM with whatever you're comfortable talking about.

After I was diagnosed with severe postpartum anxiety, the psychiatrist and the therapist both suggest that I've had anxiety long before pregnancy but didn't know it. The psychiatrist thinks I have the obsessive part of OCD as well. They both think this has to do with my childhood. The therapist feels that it's not resolved due to my laughing when I talk about it or changing the subject. We're at a bit of a standstill because I can't say I was physically abused and I refuse to take anti-depressants. She tried to get me to cry about the past and I just can't. she asked me what I think or feel about it, and I honestly don't know other than "it sucked that it happened". I feel like I failed at therapy, because she said we can't really do much more if I can't get past this point. I really want to resolve this anxiety I have, and what she says make sense, but I try to think about how I think or feel about the past and I honestly don't know.

Not judgment from anyone, but I'm constantly worried that I'd pass the anxiety genes onto my son. I'm worried enough that I don't know if I should have another child after this (fear of how pregnancy and postpartum will go and fear that I will give another child this anxiety).

I often found myself lying unintentionally to therapists or sugarcoating my answers to their questions. Regardless, I still benefited from the sessions since the connections I made within myself about the issues I had been facing were very enlightening. I found it very helpful due to the fact I felt uncomfortable talking about my depression and insecurities with anyone in my everyday life so therapy gave me somewhat of an emotional outlet. I've never stuck with one very long though since the mood swings I experience either render me feeling like I absolutely need the session one week then the next refusing to go to the appointment since I feel on top of the world.

I just hope I can cope with the potential experience of post-partum depression many women face. Just going to take it one day at a time and see how it goes. I don't want to think it is inevitable, although all the women in my family who have had children went through it.

 

[kyrabeth]

I have bipolar disorder after a major manic phase two summers ago, nearly desroyed my life (and ended it). Never been that bad since but in a more depressed phase now. I dont take meds, which has its + and -'s.

 

[cowboys angel]

I'm not on meds now either. Tho I am a little worried, with my history of self harming, about when I have to start giving myself shots daily.

 

[MilitaryMummy]

Hi ladies... i havent read this whole thread but i have been diagnosed in the last couple of months with depression.
Work seems to be one of my biggest triggers and i am currently in the process of leaving the military as i hate the job im in , the camp im at, and the people i work with and i want to spend more time with my little girl.

When im in work i feel constantly paranoid, anxious and nervous but i dont really know why?? i only have 2 months left in work but i feel like thats forever away and although i know theres a light at the end of the tunnel and 2 months will fly i just cant seem to see it yet?
I have very low self esteem, and i had alot of things happen in a short period of time that caused all this.

The only thing that stops me going of the deep end is my daughter as i would never do anything to endanger her or leave her without a mother! and one of the few things im proud of myself for is her and that everyone tells me what a good mummy i am! and how content she is.... thats what keeps me going!

sorry for the long post ladies.

xx

 

[cowboys angel]

No need to apologize!

Good luck with everything, message me if you need to walk. I understand what you're dealing with, much more than I'd ever want to admit!