midwives and the government all seem againts bottle feeding

[laura109]

I formula fed my son from the minute he was born and I told my Midwife early on in pregnancy that I would be formula feeding and not once was it questioned! My reason was my OH wasn't entitled to paternity leave and there was no way I was spending the first few weeks of my sons life struggling and stressing over whether he was latching right or getting enough food! I was going to be home alone all day with him I wanted it to be as stress free as possible.

I was in a ward with two other ladies who were up all night with their newborns breast feeding and both were in tears feeling like failures because their Lo wouldn't settle. What I don't get is if breast is best/ the most natural thing in the world/ the way babies are meant to be fed then why do so many women and babies struggle with it?

I'm pregnant with my second and also plan to formula feed this time too.

i totally agree. I dont want to be the soul feeder all the time.ofcourse i want to feed her but so does my oh. Her grandparents also do. I am not super women and the odd sunday morning my oh can get up and let me rest lol. Ive seen ladies breast feed and struggle emotionally too. It is not doable or easy in every life style for everyone. If it works then fab.

also for me im not confident with my body and i think id sweat trying to discreetly do it in public. Its no judgement on anyone else but its what i want and personally i have no desire to try. Xx

 

[CormacksGirl]

I formula fed my son from the minute he was born and I told my Midwife early on in pregnancy that I would be formula feeding and not once was it questioned! My reason was my OH wasn't entitled to paternity leave and there was no way I was spending the first few weeks of my sons life struggling and stressing over whether he was latching right or getting enough food! I was going to be home alone all day with him I wanted it to be as stress free as possible.

I was in a ward with two other ladies who were up all night with their newborns breast feeding and both were in tears feeling like failures because their Lo wouldn't settle. What I don't get is if breast is best/ the most natural thing in the world/ the way babies are meant to be fed then why do so many women and babies struggle with it?

I'm pregnant with my second and also plan to formula feed this time too.

i totally agree. I dont want to be the soul feeder all the time.ofcourse i want to feed her but so does my oh. Her grandparents also do. I am not super women and the odd sunday morning my oh can get up and let me rest lol. Ive seen ladies breast feed and struggle emotionally too. It is not doable or easy in every life style for everyone. If it works then fab.

also for me im not confident with my body and i think id sweat trying to discreetly do it in public. Its no judgement on anyone else but its what i want and personally i have no desire to try. Xx

I'm with you on the last bit! My boobs are (non pregnancy) a 38G! I cannot imagine myself with engorge breasts getting then out discreetly in public

I would like to point out that I have NO issues with mothers who breastfeed if it is working for them and their babies then that is fabulous I just have no desire to try myself!

 

[babydustcass]

I bottle fed my first born for the very same reasons, he is a healthy, bright 6 year old who is very seldom ill. Ill touch wood as I say this because I cannot actually remember him having more than a temperature.
I decided I wanted to try breastfeeding with my daughter, I really enjoyed it in the early days and those are memories I hold dear but they were short lived 2 months in as we struggled with a fast let down, meaning i couldnt breast feed anywhere but home as my LO would choke with how fast the milk was coming, and my other boob would be peeing out like a waterfall, i had to keep a towel on it. I had hoped she would get used to the flow or my body would adapt, but it didnt settle. In the end it was more comfortable for both of us to bottle feed - and as sods law would have it my daughter suffers with eczema and sensitive skin, and whilst she is otherwise pretty healthy, i can already count more times she has had a cold or been sick than my eldest has had in his entire life.
We should be allowed to do what we want to and feel more comfortable. The absolute best for baby is a happy mum and if that means bottle feeding then that is the end of discussion. I would like to try breastfeeding again in the future but if again it becomes to much of a stress, no matter what the midwife or anyone has to say about it I will be happy to move over to the bottle. I will even purchase the bottles again just in case.

 

[mummytobe_93]

Midwives aren't allowed to encourage bottle feeding in any way due to the unicef breastfeeding scheme which the government backs. It's just because The Uk have incredibly low breaatfeeding rates and they are trying to increase it as much as possible. I wouldn't take it personally it's just their job and it's in their job decacription to have pretty much no involvement or encouragement with breastfeeding x

 

[mummytobe_93]

Sorry meant bottle feeding x

 

[CormacksGirl]

I had my midwife come to the house just last Monday to help me fill in the rest of the forms and asked if I was breast/formula feeding, when I said formula she didn't bat an eyelid! I had my best friend tell me first time round not to let midwifes bully me into breast feeding, but I have had no confrontations from any of them! I still get the leaftles and DVDs from them but zero hassle, guess I'm just lucky!

 

[BunnyN]

I haven't read all the comments and I think its a shame if you don't get the support you need whatever way you decide to feed but as someome who breastfed I would say that you might be surprised how little support there actually turns out to be for many who want to breastfeed and how often formula is pushed on you. Fourmula was so over advertised and over pushed on so many years that breastfeeding rates have become very low and in many ways the system has forgotten how to support breastfeeding. As mummytobe says I think they are trying to even things out better but its a shame when mums making their own personal choice get caught in the middle.

 

[whigfield]

I feel a teeny bit guilty sometimes about giving up BFing because my son was a good latcher, and I had massive over supply so he was gaining weight like crazy. However, I couldn't take the gastro issues he seemed to be getting (and still got after I switched, but they were definitely better) and wasn't prepared to start fiddling with my diet to get it right. I also couldn't take the soaking through all my clothes, towels, bed sheets, breastpads.. The amount of milk I had was absolutely insane and it was making me very depressed. One of my nipples was very painful no matter how much cream I put on and I was just beginning to dread all feeds. I began to absolutely resent my child and began planning all kinds of crazy things like getting in my car and driving away with all my stuff and cutting myself off from everyone - hubby, my family, etc, and just starting a new life.

We cut out breastfeeding at either 5 or 6 weeks and since moving to bottles it's been so much better. LO is happier, I felt happier, OH felt happier, everyone was happier. I don't regret my decision though sometimes I look back with rose tinted glasses at it all and have a little pang of sadness - but I really, really am glad that I switched.

The pressure in hospital for us was absolutely ridiculous. It was completely pushed onto us and when I begged just for a tiny bit of formula (the initial pain was overwhelming) they made us sign a consent form, telling us all this nonsense about how it could disrupt breastfeeding, it's not best for him, blah blah blah. All that just for literally 5ml of formula.

I will say that the health visitor also didn't seem to mind when I mentioned we'd switched - no judgement, no criticism and no questions. It was just mostly midwives that were pushy with it.

 

[laura109]

Its so bad they try and push it. Its your body and nobody can force you to use your breast to feed. It makes me cross. I hope they dont try push me after labour. I am writing in my birth plan im bottle feeding. Xx

 

[Misscalais]

Breast milk is the best for babies in most cases but it just doesn't work out that way for some and that's completely fine and nothing wrong with it.
Doesn't matter what you do some one will tell you you're doing the wrong thing.
Ive done both.

 

[BabyHopes1974]

In New York there is an initiative that requires nurses to document a medical necessity when a woman wants to breastfeed and requires a lecture as well.
There are other restrictions as well that make it very difficult for a woman to breastfeed.

The truth is that the studies that the whole idea that formula is bad for babies are based on dubious data and people confuse causation with correlation. In other words it is not proven that breastfed babies are smarter or have better immune systems than ff babies. The whole brainwashing that goes on is based on flawed studies! Most of a babies immunity comes from inside the womb.

Luckily, where I live in the U.S. I had no problems whatsoever getting my twins formula in the hospital.

The whole breast is best is mentality is very harmful for women whose milk is inadequate but who are forced to try to breastfeed before ff, which puts their babies at risk of being malnourished.

As you can see I have very strong opinion on this and it makes me so mad the pressure women get.

 

[laura109]

Totally agree. My midwife begs me to try it for the first week. She never asks me how i feel about it or what fits into my lifestyle. You need clothes that you can easily get your breast in and out off. Nursing bras. You need to buy a machine to express if you do not wish to feed out and about. If you spend money on pumps etc and you are not able to feed for long you have wasted money. If you are sterilising and expressing and feeding its extra hard work.

My two biggest reasons are my confidence and id be stresses whilst out trying to think where i can feed. My secind reason is my partner is really looking forward to bonding and feeding her. I gad other ladies on this board say your partner will soon get fed up and loose interest but i know we are a team. If im washing up or cooking tea he will happily give her a bottle.

Not one part of me is curious to try breast. I do not judge or have an opinion on the way people choose to feed there babies. I just think both methods are just as good. If they work x

 

[felix555]

My husband never once got bored or fed up of feeding our little boy and luckily for me and more importantly! ... Never once got fed up of washing the very fiddly Dr Brown's bottles

 

[tubs]

Just reading this thread now. I intend to FF my new baby. I BF my first son for 2 weeks and the exhaustion nearly drove me insane. I also was not comfortable breastfeeding in front of other people especially other men!
This time around I intend to FF from the start. My DH and my parents can help with feeds, I can catch a little extra sleep and give plenty of my time to my DS1. I really didn't enjoy my new baby last time due to the extreme exhaustion...he was feeding every hour at one stage.

 

[laura109]

Good on you hun and its not a bad thing to formula feed. My dad would be out the door if i got my breast out. Id be the same as you really uncomfy infront of men. Not everyones families are the same.

i think it does baby good to be fed by daddy and grandparents too. My daughter is half his and he is looking forward to being hands on and feeding her and changing her. Id never want to take that role from him. Plus i know it will make me smile seeing them bonding.
hopefully all the ignorance around bottle feeding will change again one day. X

 

[tubs]

When I switched to FF , my parents did alot of feeds. You should see the bond my DS has with them now...it's adorable. It actually improved my bonding with him too because I wasnt a zombie!!

 

[laura109]

Exactly. Parenting is not a one person job. Supporting and helping eachother is good for the baby and yourselves. Some people do great with it but others dont. Your son will be just as happy healthy and braint as any other baby xx