Miscarriage

[Lily Lopez]

Im 18.. next week on Friday it will be my birthday.. when I found out i was pregnant i used a pregnancy app to give me an idea how far along I was.. the app predicted that I was about 7 weeks but in reality I was 5 weeks and 2 days when I went to get checked. I’m not going to lie I did go to Planned Parenthood but only my family doesn’t know that I was expecting. I didn’t want my visit to go through my insurance so I paid out of my own money. My plan was to continue my pregnancy but I wanted to wait after the first trimester to tell anyone. Only two people knew I was expecting, my baby’s father and my best friend. After my check up I knew this pregnancy wasn't going to last.. since monday I’ve been spotting and the spotting turned into bleeding.. Last night.. at 3 am I woke up to the most painful cramps in my life. I was sobbing because of how much in pain i was in. I knew I was bleeding but I didn’t expect it to be alot.. i felt something come out.. i went to the bathroom to change my pad and I saw him.. my baby.. he looked exactly how the app showed me how he would look like.. i didnt know what to do I woke up my boyfriend and we cried.. we decided to name our baby Alex since we didnt know if the baby was a boy or a girl.. I scheduled an appointment for Saturday to see if the miscarriage was completed.. I would write my baby letters because I just knew that I wasnt going to be able to carry my baby to full term.. regardless i still had faith.. God knows why things happen.. Im just sad that my baby had to become an angel too soon



***UPDATE***
On Saturday I went to my appointment to check if the miscarriage was complete or not.. sadly it is.. I still cry every night.. I had to get my blood drawn to see if my HCG hormone levels are going down and it is.. I miss my baby every single day.. what hurts the most is that I didn't get the chance to listen to his/her little heartbeat

 

[maybebby]

Awe hun I'm so sorry for your loss lots of hugs! Sometimes things are hard to understand but hold on to your faith and in time you will understand

 

[OnErth&InHvn]

I lost a baby in 2009. The heartbeat stopped at 6w3d and I was 9wk5dys. I am thankful I got to have my baby at home and hold him. You will get through this!

 

[Suggerhoney]

I lost my first baby at almost 11 weeks. Had a scan at 6 weeks and saw the HB but at 10+4 I started pouring with blood. The pain was intence and I passed alot of large clots.
I was 19 at the time and although it was such a long time ago I still think of that baby.
I have since gone on to have children and and am now pregnant again. Did have another 2 losses in between at 5 and 6 weeks.
Losses are horrible and heartbreaking but it will get easier sweety. Just give it time.
U will always remember that little baby but u will go on to have more. Keep that faith sweetheart and know ure not alone.

 

[Bevziibubble]

I'm so sorry

 

[lilstarsmum]

I’m so sorry for your loss, Lily. My heart goes out to you at this time. I know how difficult and painful it must be for you. It hurts, and yet the hurting isn’t all bad, because it’s a part of the love you feel for your baby. Though I don’t have words to convey my care and concern over the pain which you shared, I said a prayer for you and your boyfriend, and I hope that God will surround you with His comfort and heal you whenever you hurt. I’d suggest that check out the book, I’ll Hold You in Heaven, by Jack Hayford. I know it’s not easy, but stay strong. Hugs!

 

[busytulip]

Incredibly sorry for your loss.
I hope the sting of it lessens with each day. And though there will be times it hurts so bad you can't breathe, I pray those days are few.

 

[baileybubs]

I’m so sorry for your loss hun, all I can say is just let yourself grieve, cry if you need to. I struggled a lot when I had mine because people kept saying things that I’m sure they thought were helpful but they really weren’t, I felt like I wasn’t allowed to be sad. But you are allowed to be sad, but please know that it won’t always be this painful and you will never forget Alex.
Lots of love to you and the baby’s father x

 

[Bevziibubble]

I'm so sorry for your loss