Missing my little boy (current preg mentioned)

[WelshGirl]

Hi everyone,

I'm sorry to be posting to ask for support, but I'm struggling so badly at the moment.

My little boy, William, was Stillborn on January 23rd this year, at 29 weeks. He had become tangled in his cord, and his oxygen got cut off

I miss him so so so much....we are just getting things ready for the arrival of his little sister in 3 weeks, and I am feeling guilty that we never decorated a bedroom for him, never bought a cot for him......

I feel like I let him down by not having done any of this stuff for him.......and I am scared that once his sister is here, everyone else is going to forget about him..... He is still my first child, he will always be my little boy, & I don't want anyone to forget that.

I miss him so much it hurts.....

xxxx

 

[NickyT75]

Aw Babe of course William was your first child and you will never ever forget him

you didn't let him down and there was nothing you could've done to prevent what happened

Im sure he is watching over you and his little sister & knows you will always love him no matter what xx

 

[FEDup1981]

 

[Wishfull]

Im sure your little William is very proud of you. And loves you very very much. Its not your fault sweetie. He will be looking after his little sister forever. She will always have an angel to look after her. Im sure he is looking after you too.
Take care darling god bless.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[natthecat]

not sure how well this will sit with you... but maybe dedicae a little piece of your new baby's room to him, even t it be something as simple as a little addition of a blue part of a cot mobile or, a small blue teddy. maybe in your new baby's cot you could have a pair of booties painted on one of the sides for him to protect your LO?

Somethind as simple as one of those "tributes" just to have him in the room protecting your little girl as well as still being in your heart?!

if you still had his scan pictures, you could have one put into a frame with one of your girl.

 

[jen1604]

*hugs* you have not let him down.Try not to think like that.I can only imagine how much you are hurting right now.I have had 3 miscarriages and found it so hard when we were getting ready for my little girls birth but I know that cannot compare to what you are going through.I love natthecats idea of maybe having a tribute in your baby girls room although obviously the decision is yours.
Don't apologise for asking for support,thats what we are here for.Take care darling xxxxxxxx

 

[becky77]

oh hun we are here to support you any time, william will always be your first born and you will always have a special place in your heart for him, you did not let him down and i bet he is watching thinking what a wonderful mummy he has, and will always be there to watch over his little sister. thats a lovely idea about dedicating a small part her room to him even if nobody else knows you will know you are honouring his memory.


xx

 

[WelshGirl]

not sure how well this will sit with you... but maybe dedicae a little piece of your new baby's room to him, even t it be something as simple as a little addition of a blue part of a cot mobile or, a small blue teddy. maybe in your new baby's cot you could have a pair of booties painted on one of the sides for him to protect your LO?

Somethind as simple as one of those "tributes" just to have him in the room protecting your little girl as well as still being in your heart?!

if you still had his scan pictures, you could have one put into a frame with one of your girl.

Thank you hun - we had already thought of doing something like this, but we're struggling to find the 'right' thing to go in her room....
If we don't find something by the time she arrives, as a temporary measure, we will put in the teddy my OH bought me from William on Mothers Day......its a baby boy Tatty Teddy.....
But we both want to find something else.....just can't come up with anything at the moment....

xxx

 

[natthecat]

i am sure it will be something that pops into your head and will just be the right thing.

 

[LaDY]

No matter how many children come along im sure he will still be in everyones hearts xx

 

[redberry3]

 

[violet 73]

hiya hun 1st of all im really sorry to hear about william it must be one of the hardest thing to go through , but i don,t think anyone will forget about william , i lost a baby in sep 1993 i was 17 weeks had to have him terminated i got a pic of him everyone always talks about him , i even told the kids about him & they talk about all the time esp my daughter & she is 8 ive had 4 kids since daniel was born , so i wouldn,t worry as even my mum & sisters talk about him . violet x

 

[artypants2008]

Hi, I read your post the other week and had a little weep and have been thinking about you as I thought you must be due any time. I have just read your other post and would like to congratulate you on the birth of new baby Olivia. I am sure she will be keeping you very busy from now on but I am sure that William is not far from your thoughts as well.

I create ultrasound prints and as someone previously mentioned dedicating a little place in your Olivia's room in memory of William and you mentioned that your oh gave you a tatty teddy I have created the following for you (I hope you don't mind).

https://i710.photobucket.com/albums/ww106/artypants2008/tatty_william.jpg

If you like I can send you a print, just pm me, I can also change the tatty teddy picture if you like. I can do you one for Olivia's scan picture as well but with a girly tatty on.

 

[born2Bmama]

I am so sorry for your loss but so excited for you and the arrival of your little girl.
My daughter was stillborn at 24 weeks in November. Since she passed away I have been working on a couple projects that make me feel like I have done something special just for her. My favorite is creating a shadow box filled with momentos such as her footprints, sonogram pictures, a blanket, dried flowers from her funeral etc. It is her space in our home that reminds us and those who visit our home that she is an important member of our family who will always be loved and remembered. It is almost like making a room just for her. I am also working on a scrapbook with pictures, sympathy cards and letters I have written to her. Doing this has really helped me with my grief and gives me a chance to focus on what she means to me. I think these projects will also help me share her with her brother and sisiter as they get older and help them remember her too. These are just some ideas that might help you feel like you are making time for your LO and help with the guilt. Which you shouldn't feel but us moms always do. I also like the idea mentioned about putting something for your little boy in your daughters room. Take care.

 

[JASMAK]

Awww, hon, I am sure what you are feeling is very normal, and I wouldn't be surprised if other moms in your situation feel the same, and I bet you will often think of him when you daughter reaches milestones. You love him, and you will always love and think of him - and I am sure it will always be hard whenever you are reminded of the special moments taken away.