Mothers pound shop gifts....

[kirstybumx3]

not entirely the same but my MIL pisses me off with her comments on what we buy for baby. we have got our son quite a few designer outfits, a couple of pairs of ralph lauren shoes, a pair of toms, to name a few... so what?
she has to comment and say its 'ridiculous and baby will only be sick on them'
big deal? they will wash!
and that she 'wont bother buying anything else for the baby as we obviously wont appreciate the things she buys if we are paying £100 for a sleepsuit'
don't bother then WOMAN we never asked you to buy anything!
its not like she buys tat, we appreciate what she brought, but theres no need for her to be the way she is about what we choose to buy.
if we are in the situation where we can afford to buy nice things for our baby then why the hell shouldn't we? things like that sell on for a large fraction of what we paid for them anyway!
stupid witch x

 

[d_b]

My parents buy some nice stuff for DS but they can't pass up a deal! So I've gotten some things for him that I couldn't use, and they knew that.. for example she gave him some slippers with NO traction on the bottom that were really stiff and didn't look comfy. They wouldn't stay on either. My mom mentioned that I probably couldn't use them but they were a deal! Umm.. thanks mom

I'd be worried that the dollar store containers contain BPA. I re-used the glass jars that pre-made baby food came in for my homemade baby foods.

 

[Mum2BKW]

i dont see the issue with them being pink? my son had a pink cup, has worn pink tops etc.. its just a colour? and those tubs are extremely useful - yes they are small but so is your babies tummy

tbh i wouldnt ever moan about recieving a gift from someone - they only trying to be nice and just because shes got money dont mean everything has to be expesive - storage pots are storage pots? why does it matter what they cost or where they came from

I'm not really sure why I feel that pink isn't appropriate - I guess as we're team yellow I would expect things to stay neutral until baby is born, it just seems odd to me for someone to buy something bright pink when we don't know the gender. I have no problem dressing a girl in blue but I wouldn't dress a boy in pink, just personal choice. I don't think it would matter if they were nice, useful pots, but I just don't think these are!

It also surprises me how much it matters where they came from - what a snob I must be!

Don't get me wrong - I'm very thrifty with baby things. I've got bags of second hand clothes (we've only bought 5 things new for bubs!), our buggy was second hand from Preloved and I've just bought a used £100 nappy bag for a tenner from eBay, so please don't think that I'm going OTT on everything being new and expensive and from Harrods! The difference is that these things are the ones that we wanted, they are to my and Hubbies tastes and they are things we need but chose not to pay full price for. To me that's different to picking up cheap bits and pieces that aren't wanted and will sit in a cupboard, unused.

 

[Dragonfly]

I would half understand if it was clothing but its a container , something you use for your baby not that the world will even see it. It wont do any harm. Sadly its the way society is conditioned to think, over a colour. Which is you read back on the history of the colour pink its interesting, I blame the nazis on associating gays with the colour pink as thats how they where identified in concentration camps by a pink triangle on the arm. Thus many after that not wanting pink on a boy.

 

[Tami]

Could she be waiting to spend until baby is born and you know gender maybe?
I suppose the tubs could be handy for formula, if you're using it. Otherwise I'm not sure why you would need them yet! The scratch mits were thoughtful though, even if they're a bit crap, lol.
She could be playing it safe, if you don't mention things you need around her then I suppose she wont know what to buy? Or she's gone into grandmother mode and you're going to start getting THE most random things.
My grandma brings us biscuits and tinned goods, LOL. Also some fleecy blankets and an empty biscuit tin!

 

[MumMumMum]

My in-laws are terrible for buying things cheap for the grandchildren. I appreciate them buying things, don't get me wrong. Me and my SIL have discussed a few times what's been bought. I mean things like summer clothes in the sales in the size that will fit in the winter and the other way around. They have bought this baby snow boot slippers in 0-3. That's June to August - and why on earth would a newborn need slippers like these? I just say thanks and put them in the drawer. They aren't likely to be used but I just want an easy life.

To me though I'd really rather they spent the money on a phone call or text message or even petrol for a visit. They never get in touch to see how any of us are and they waited for us all to have children and then moved 2.5 hours away. When we visit it costs us £60 in petrol to get there and back. We also end up driving all weekend because we have a bigger car than them. We then go where they want and 'pop' to somewhere which turns out to be an hour away. Get there, eat a picnic lunch and drive back again. Not my favourite use of money, time or car mileage!

You have two choices really - take them and keep her happy by not saying anything. You might find a use for it Or tell her, risk offending her but help her not waste her money

 

[smokey]

Tbh I think your being a bit ungreatfull.
Just say thank you and do somthing with them after even if it is throwing it away.
If its the little pots im thinking of they are actualy very handy for freazing puried food when weaning.
As for the mittens some clothe bits there are not bad, the dribble bibs are great so maby she didnt realise the quality was bad.
Some girls would be thrilled for their morhers or mil to show some interest or want somthing to do with them and their babies, especialy the ones that havnt got their mothers around anymore to share this time with even if it was just buying a bit of useless stuff.

 

[Mum2BKW]

Tbh I think your being a bit ungreatfull.
Just say thank you and do somthing with them after even if it is throwing it away.
If its the little pots im thinking of they are actualy very handy for freazing puried food when weaning.
As for the mittens some clothe bits there are not bad, the dribble bibs are great so maby she didnt realise the quality was bad.
Some girls would be thrilled for their morhers or mil to show some interest or want somthing to do with them and their babies, especialy the ones that havnt got their mothers around anymore to share this time with even if it was just buying a bit of useless stuff.

Sadly I agree with you - I am ungrateful! Not for the thought, I really do appreciate her wanting to buy stuff, but I don't see why she can't buy nice stuff. I'd rather her buy nothing than buy tat. And as for not realising the quality was bad - it's a pound shop. It wouldn't be a huge assumption that they're going be a bit shite. The tubs - yes, I agree tubs are normally useful. But really - these ones are so small they look like a children's toy and I really, really don't see that they'll be useful for holding food.

Anyway I guess I'll just have to hope that she doesn't carry on the habit, otherwise I will HAVE to say something.

It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who gets given crap presents though! Thanks ladies

 

[Pink Flowers]

But some people wouldn't see it as tat.

I got some hideous stuff when I was pregnant with Oliver, cheap nasty stuff that we never used. But I always said thank you and put it to one side.

I have seen the scratch mitts you are talking about and personally I wouldn't use them, but the little pots will come in handy if you are puréeing food or even making dinners up. They might look small but when a baby is weaned they only eat small amounts at the beginning.

 

[M&S+Bump]

Stage 1 weaning pots are usually 1oz which is pretty small - and at the beginning of weaning you'll be lucky if your baby will eat even half the contents of one of those little pots in one go. I think you'll find they'll come in useful later on, even if it doesn't seem like it right now.

 

[Mum2BKW]

But some people wouldn't see it as tat.

I got some hideous stuff when I was pregnant with Oliver, cheap nasty stuff that we never used. But I always said thank you and put it to one side.

I did say thank you - it was only really afterwards that it occurred to me that this might be the start of more pound-shop-presents if I wasn't careful! I don't want to keep receiving things and having to say thank you when I'd so much rather she saved her money or put it into an account for baby as some people here have suggested.

Maybe it's partly because it's my Mum and I know there is nothing in her house that hasn't come from John Lewis.

 

[Sarahdisco]

If they are the storage pots I think they are - never mind for bubs they will be handy for you! We've got them on our windowsill in the kitchen and bathroom to put jewellery (rings etc) in when your doing the dishes etc. We have the teeny ones and then I have the next size up as well in the bathroom for hair clips and bobbles.

I can understand what you mean about the scratch mitts, I've had a couple of presents which I know I wont use (bibs with the ribbon ties etc) but I just smile and say thankyou and they go into a bag. I'll take them down to the charity shop or to our local Crisis Centre (they are always grateful for donations!) when I get chance as I figure they will be handy for someone!

Just smile sweetly and suggest things she can buy - wipes etc. If she is looking for little bits like what you would get from pound shops etc ask her to look out for baby toiletires (cotton wool, wipes etc) as you can get them relatively cheap in the likes of Home Bargains and they will definitely come in useful!!!

 

[smokey]

When first weaning they only eat a ice cube size at first so unless they are thimble size I dont see the problem, as for the mittens your going to loose about 10 a week (annoyingly its never pairs you loose) so again youll probably think thank goodness they didnt cost too much.
If its a case of the problem is how much someone else spent on your baby when they could of spent more money then sorry but wow.

 

[Pink Flowers]

When first weaning they only eat a ice cube size at first so unless they are thimble size I dont see the problem, as for the mittens your going to loose about 10 a week (annoyingly its never pairs you loose) so again youll probably think thank goodness they didnt cost too much.
If its a case of the problem is how much someone else spent on your baby when they could of spent more money then sorry but wow.

This is what I thought as well tbh. I just didn't say it.

My OH's nan has so much money but sometimes buys us cheap tacky stuff. But then I think older people don't realise, as in their days it was all that cheap if that makes sense?

 

[Mum2BKW]

If its a case of the problem is how much someone else spent on your baby when they could of spent more money then sorry but wow.

It sounds bad doesn't it! It's not so much about how much was spent - something nice at a good price is fine (hence my eBaying and getting good second hand stuff for baby) but only if it's nice. So no, I don't expect her to spend lots of money on baby. Just to buy nice things, preferably that I actually need rather than randomly picking up stuff that we might need in 6 months time but probably not.

Though I must admit that I'd also much rather her spend £20 on one, really nice baby outfit or toy than to buy 20 pound shop things that I'm not going to use.

 

[MrsTurner2012]

I don't think it's a case of she wants more expensive presents from her mother.
Just that she'd rather her mother bought her worthwhile items instead of buying for the sake of it.
These things may be worthwhile to others but obviously not to the OP

I'd much rather my family members used money wisely that bough me lots of little cheap things over and over! And I've told them so.
Not one of them was offended as I posted earlier. They understood and agreed.

 

[Sephie]

I agree with MrsTurner, I don't think Mum2BWK wasn't asking for more expensive presents, but just hoping that her mum doesn't get the wrong idea that everything that she gives may be extremely useful to them but actually she'd rather them not spend unnecessarily on things that she may or may not use.

My in laws and the in law family side have also adopted this approach and to be honest as well (and I do appreciate they do give us gifts), I'd rather they just contribute the 1 or 2 or however many Euros to something we really need rather than just to get any old item for the sake of having to give a gift?

 

[MrsTurner2012]

I think my problem is that I am a very thoughtful present giver and I expect people to be the same.

My aunt once got me a set of bubble bath for Xmas one year and I didn't even have a bath in my house! It's that kind of present giving that gets me riled up!

We've been given/bought the majority of things for this baby and I am massively grateful. But it has been mainly done on my terms.

I suppose if we had the same kind of gifting culture as the US it would make life easier!

It's only the same as registering what we want and the people buying us requested items.

 

[smokey]

Maybe its just the way im reading it then (but iv re read it and it still comes across the same way to me)

But especialy by going on to comment how much money she spends on other things for herself and how much she has and with comments like

This is probably a bi snobby but my Mum has LOADS of money - she just spent £14k on a new kitchen, has been on 5 holidays in the last 2 years (places like Egypt and China, all inclusive, at upwards of 2/3k a pop) and really isn't short of cash

I don't understand why she can't buy nice things for baby.

Just reads to me as if its more a grumble that the stuff brought was cheap and from poundland and not more expensive stuff.

Anyway sorry I dont mean to pick.
We are having the same sort of problem but the oppesite end, OH family keeps spending out money and buying the big stuff but this normaly ends up meaning they just buy it without talking to me so I end up not getting much of a say in the items.
Id rather they left it to us to buy the stuff then I can at least pick what I want rather then a surprise of " we just ordered the cot" well what bloody cot? which one is it? why cant I pick my own stuff?