My breastfed 6wk old using me as a dummy, my boobs need a break!

[leigh5tom]

So basically, my lb is using my nipples to suck himself to sleep. He has a good feed, comes off, then when he gets tired he cries again. When I put him to the breast he sucks differently and is asleep in minutes.

The only problem is that I can't then remove him! He wakes straight up. He is basically using me as a dummy, he stays latched on whilst asleep, and does tiny sucks every now and then. This happens night time too.

Has anyone got any advice? I've tried so many different dummy's but no luck xxxx

 

[Shortstuff88]

Have you tried just letting him suck on your little finger? I had to do this when I was breastfeeding as my LO would do the same. He would suck on my finger for about 5 mins and be asleep.

 

[Mum2BKW]

Your baby isn't using you as a dummy. He is fulfilling a need. If you must take him off then do so but I would suggest making yourself comfortable, he'll come off in his own time.

 

[megrenade]

Your baby isn't using you as a dummy. He is fulfilling a need. If you must take him off then do so but I would suggest making yourself comfortable, he'll come off in his own time.

While I do agree, I let DS get into that "habit" and now I have to nurse him to sleep at almost 2 years old, STILL.

And by doing that, I am "neglecting" the needs of my newborn, trying to cater to my toddler who screams bloody murder if he gets overtired and needs "bee bee" to sleep

OP, good luck. And maybe instead of nursing him to sleep, pat, rock or bounce him and set him down onto some warm blankets? It'll take some dedication, but it's worth it.. you don't want to be in my boat!

 

[marymoomin]

I fed twins 13 hrs a day for 6 mths. I feel your pain . X

 

[Shortstuff88]

I fed twins 13 hrs a day for 6 mths. I feel your pain . X

Oh my goodness! You are like Wonder Woman haha.

 

[staralfur]

Your baby isn't using you as a dummy. He is fulfilling a need. If you must take him off then do so but I would suggest making yourself comfortable, he'll come off in his own time.

While I agree that comfort is a need, I'm not sure that this is terribly helpful advice given that she has a 2 year old as well and "making herself comfortable" is probably not a very real solution.

OP- My LO comfort sucked all day every day for months. Even now, at 2, she would nurse for comfort several times a day if I let her. She never took to a dummy, either. I'd probably try out a sling/carrier and see if you can nurse hands-free so that you can attend to your toddler or whatever else!

 

[marymoomin]

I fed twins 13 hrs a day for 6 mths. I feel your pain . X

Oh my goodness! You are like Wonder Woman haha.

The phase passes and oddly you will look back and miss it! I got quite claustrophobic and couldn't bear anyone one else being near me during that period. Still it's a special time and not for long. I don't agree ( as I was told, frequently) that I was making a rod for my own back. I had premies who had catching up to do. I would say try to enjoy as far as you can, you will blink and your baby will be up to other stuff, like crawling at break neck speed, or hiding in wardrobes, or sticking things in plug holes and believe me, your boobs won't get a look in! Lol!

 

[ledzep]

I agree with previous poster. My little guy did that when he was so young but it does stop eventually.
He's 18mths now and feeds once maybe twice in 24 hours and doesn't need them for comfort now. It will get better. Good luck x

 

[sue_88]

What dummies have you tried? My LO only takes MAM.

Have you seen the new TT ones? The orthodontic ones, they've changed the shape of the teat, maybe worth trying?

My LO couldn't comfort suck on me but a very needy comfort sucker so for her the dummy worked amazing, I'm grateful that she took it.

It won't last forever, hopefully, but hope you managed to fine a solution soon x

ETA: these are the new ones... https://www.tommeetippee.co.uk/product/any-time-soothers/

 

[claudinator]

The new tommee tippee soothers are great joe used to use my nipple as a soother and now he uses the tt soother their brilliant I think they form the pulled in nipple shape in his mouth. I put the soother in then put his face in line with my boob and it worked first time.

 

[Kelskiii]

My LO does this, I had to let her due to weight loss/slow weight gain, even if she was getting a small amount of milk it was better than nothing.

I only have LO so I'm quite happy to let LO comfort feed & sleep on me, although I do get a lot of comments that I shouldn't let her do this but it's either that or she doesn't nap all day. She sleeps 12hrs a night with no comfort feeding & in her Moses basket, it's just nap time she comfort sucks.

I asked the hv what I would have done if I had 2 children & she said to get a bag ready for the time you are sat & fill it full of activity toys/books to keep your LO entertained. I don't know how much this would work though.

 

[halullat]

My LO does this too, but I don't have anyone else to be running around after so just leave him to it. Not a helpful reply I know, but just wanted you to know you aren't alone! x

 

[leigh5tom]

Thanks everyone for your comments.

Getting comfy and just letting him so it really isn't an option, as someone noticed I also have a two year old who is already being neglected

I just don't know what to do. I've tried the new TT ones and the MAM ones, a real cheapy dummy and an advent one.
I'm at my wits end. I'm tired, my nipples are needing a break, and my 2 year old is sad she doesn't have any of my attention. I can't remember the last time I picked her up and cuddled her :'-( xxxx

 

[sue_88]

Has your DH had a go at settling him? Perhaps it's because he can smell mummy?

 

[leigh5tom]

Still no luck - he screams!

I think this has stemmed from when he was first born - I had issues with my milk supply and was started on Domperidone by my GP, as well as putting him to the breast as much as possible. I think it was about 3/4 weeks before my supply was adequate, so obviously for 3-4 weeks he spent all day every day on my boob. The health visitor said it could be because of that anyway.

xxxx

 

[Rachel_C]

At that age I would just get a carrier/wrap and learn to feed in it. He's still so young that the sucking will be helping both of you - you with supply (even if you don't have a 'problem' with supply, he still needs to tell your boobs to make more milk as he's growing so quickly) and him with his adjustment to the world. It probably won't last much longer.

When you do need to unlatch him, have you tried lots of different ways? I quickly found that timing was important with my LO - in the first 10 mins after falling asleep she would wake up if I moved but between 10-15 mins after, I could very slowly slide my little finger in her mouth, leave it there for a few seconds, then very slowly start taking my nipple out. I'd leave my finger there for a little longer then slowly remove that too. Sounds like a faff but if it works... You might find something totally different works for you LO, although it doesn't sound like a dummy will. Now my LO is much older, it's better if I remove her quite soon after she falls asleep and I can whip the boob away quickly!

 

[hayz_baby]

When he comes off nipple have you tried letting him lie there with his lips right by your nipple?

6 weeks is a ww so it might change quite quickly. I totally understand the difficulty though! X

 

[leigh5tom]

He usually comes off, and has his lips by my nipple then will go to suck and realise there's no nipple in his mouth and wake up lol! The little terror!

Yes hopefully things will change again soon - they don't stay the same very long do they!

Thanks everyone for your help an kind words it's really reassuring to know I'm not the only one going through this ! Xxx