My family are driving me crazy once again!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by susan_1981, Oct 10, 2013.

  1. susan_1981

    susan_1981 Mummy to 2 boys :)

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    Sorry this is another long one! They all drive me crazy but my sister is probably driving me the most crazy. I posted last week about her annoying me. She always says contradictory things.

    I'm pregnant with my second boy - they'll only be 15 months between them - and I think it's so cute when kids are dressed the same. Anyway, today I bought them matching jumpers, jeans, socks, hats and mittens (but then I realised they don't have matching coats or shoes but hey, there's still time :haha:). This is the only matching outfit that they'll have and so I emailed a picture of the outfits to my sister thinking she'd say it's cute but she said she can't believe that I'm going to have them in matching outfits. She said that she really doesn't like it and her and her husband often comment on how they don't like it when they see children out dressed the same. She thinks children should have their own identities. But "each to their own". That just annoyed me. Her 11 year old daughter always runs around in a Chelsea kit so I replied saying "If I had a daughter, I wouldn't let her wear a football kit, let alone a Chelsea one so there :p Haha each to their own!" - although I probably would if I had a daughter and she wanted to wear one. Just me being petty.

    Then she keeps telling me how much work I'm going to have cut out for me once baby number 2 arrives. EVERYTHING I say is "you wait until this one arrives". I don't know what makes her such an expert seeing as she just has the one child and, as I said, she's 11 so it's probably not the freshest in her mind anyway. She says it all the time.

    When me and my husband started trying for our son (we were trying for over 3 years and my sister knew this), if her daughter had made a mess or was playing up, she'd say "and you want kids...". Not appropriate when you've been trying and trying for years with no luck.

    My sister's husband has said a few times how they're the only ones who have given my mum a grand-daughter (both me and my older brother have 2 boys each). He didn't say it in a nasty way but it always feels as if he's boasting about that fact, especially as he knows that I really would love a girl (but I'll be happy with boys if that's all I ever have).

    I feel like she just can't get enough of having digs at me. I could have plenty at her. She lets her 11 year old daughter play Grand Theft Auto and Saints Row which are both over 18s and have plenty of sex and violence in them - not to mention that one of the main characters in one of the games uses a dildo as his main weapon! She buys her a £40 game for her computer just because she started secondary school, she bought her another game for her computer that she was supposed to get for Christmas but she got it early because a football game she wanted to go to got cancelled. I mean I could criticise her for spoiling her child to the point that when Christmas and Birthdays come round, my niece doesn't know what she wants because she has everything! But I don't because it's their daughter, it's up to them what they do.

    I wondered if it was me that was coming off funny in emails or texts and it was making her bite back but then the email I sent her with the matching outfits was "how cute is this". And her reply was how she can't stand that.

    My family are like this little tight knit gang that do everything together. They are each other's social lives, they defend each other even if they don't agree.

    Then my brother (I have 2 - this one is single and doesn't have kids) annoyed me. My family in their little gang are going away to Hastings for the night this weekend. My mum doesn't want to go but if she doesn't go, no one else will! I said that the timing couldn't be much worse because my due date is only 2 weeks away and I really do want my mum around for when I do go into labour as I need someone to look after my son. And when I go into labour, I don't want my in-laws round, the only people I'll want near me when I'm in that kind of pain is my husband and my mum. My brother said "oh right so mum has to put her life on hold for you to have your baby". I said they could go on their little jolly any time they want but now isn't great timing as my mum won't be driving down to Hastings so if I do go into labour - which I do know is unlikely to happen on that particular day - she won't be able to get home as they will all be drinking. Then he started saying why couldn't I take my son to the hospital with me - like you can have your child in the labour room with you!, or why can't I go on my own! My response was "you won't even go to bloody Hastings without her but I should have my baby on my own?" then he started saying that he's sure single women have these kind of problems. He was saying it in a slightly jokey way but I know he was making his point that our mum is going to Hastings, end of. I haven't stopped her, haven't even tried. Aaargh, they are making me want to move abroad!!!
     
  2. lotuspetals

    lotuspetals Well-Known Member

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    Lol, sorry you've got to deal with that. I would be hurt and frustrated too, when it seems none of my family can sympathize with me...especially being as far along as you are. Might be best to avoid them when you know they can't reciprocate any support. Your mom, however, might benefit from knowing how you truly feel and the importance of her presence at this time in your life.

    Hope things smooth out for you, hun.
     
  3. nolansmom

    nolansmom Guest

    I had this when I yelled at my Ds and his cousin while playing and my SIL said "just wait till you have two" to which I replied "then they'll both be mine and I can fix their behaviour, can't do that with someone else's kid, can you?".. NO reply.. :)

    Don't let it annoy to - be snarky back..:)
     
  4. susan_1981

    susan_1981 Mummy to 2 boys :)

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    Haha, I think I'm just too hormonal to be sarky! I want to throttle the lot of them!!! But I did say to my mum that I was really worrying that I'd go into labour when they were away and she said "I won't go if you're worried". And she did sound genuine, but I said to go. I know it's very unlikely that I'll go into labour on the very day she isn't around but it'll be just my luck! And I know if she doesn't go because of me, my family will never let me hear the end of it!

    Blimey, I really do need this baby out of me. Everything bothers me times a million at the moment! x
     
  5. Amsan

    Amsan Well-Known Member

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    EVERYTHING is bothering me too! I'm sorry your family is being that way! Definitely doesn't help when you're uncomfortable and ready for a baby to just be out! I don't think it matters how old we get, we always want our moms there with us in the big moments of our lives. No shame in that and I would tell them all to shove it.
     
  6. susan_1981

    susan_1981 Mummy to 2 boys :)

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    Thanks Amsan. I know you're going through it as well at the moment and hopefully your baby will be here really soon. Completely agree, we never stop needing our mums! xxx
     

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