My first wedding stress-RANT!!!!!!!

[DonnaBallona]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhh!!!

They always say wEddings bring out the best and worst in people. Well, with less than 14 weeks to go-its my turn

Firstly-Invitations.

We are getting married September 20th. I gave out invites april 2nd (yes-APRIL!!!) the RSVP date was June 1st.

Several people have not replied either way. One person has replied and said itll just have to be her as her husband cant get time off work-is that ok? I said yes, otherwise if shes more comfortable just come to the evening as she literally wont know anyone but me, the bride. I had no reply. People are supposed to have paid for bedrooms through me. They are at a MASSIVLEY reduced rate, and I am passing the money onto the hotel to make it easier for them. Again, several people asked me to hold bedrooms but havent paid for them

Secondly-the guest list

we can invite 65 people to the day. Its £165 a head so OBVIOUSLY if youre invited you are REALLY special to us. We are paying for this ALL ourselves too-we are having no help.
I have had no reply from my DHs mental uncle. He has a short-term GF who we have never met, (but apparently is engaged to-first Iv heard of it!) and she has made no effort to meet us whenever we're with him. My MIL politely asked us not to invite her to the wedding as she had snubbed this uncle at Xmas (her BF).
This afternoon, Iv had DFs grandad on my case saying 'he's very upset she hasnt been invited' and 'cant understand why' AND 'he wont rsvp until he hears yes or no if he can bring her'

YES, HELLO COMPLETE STRANGER, come to our wedding!!!!!!! I am NOT about to turf one of my oldest friends off the guest list so this woman I have never met can come!!!!

LASTLY-my MIL!!!! (bet you didnt see that one coming!)
I asked her a month ago for a small bit of info about a friend of hers (that I have never met, might I add!) who is coming to the wedding with her husband. I am putting a small one-line quote underneath each persons name on the place card as an ice-breaker of sorts. Some humourous, some just a bit of info about the person. I asked her a MONTH ago about this woman-her oldest friend. She promised me she would 'get onto it'. I have chased her, and chased her, and chased her to NO avail. She still hasnt gotten back to me about it, and when I asked her again today she said she 'would definatly get onto it this week'. I am FURIOUS! so now im going to write something random on it and she'll have to bloody like it.

Oh man, I am SO CROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what is WRONG with people? am I being a complete bridezilla?
and the question is-would YOU say something to this uncle or leave it be? this woman is NOT going to be coming! xx

 

[Mummy May]

I wouldn't say anything at all, she isn't on the invite hence she hasn't been invited. If he doesn't RSVP then he isn't coming. Simple! How about designating someone to chase people to pay for their rooms? People are so bloody rude aren't they! I don't think you're being bridezilla at all, I would be very pissed off! Xx

 

[emyandpotato]

The invites and rooms issue I am having myself! SO many people have asked for rooms, of which there are a limited number, but have they paid?! Nope! Most people haven't bothered to formally RSVP (via our wedding website, very easy) to either room or actual wedding invite. And I bet when all rooms are booked people will get annoyed that I didn't save one for them...

As to your uncle, I agree with Mummy May! Or get your DF to tell him she isn't invited and if he doesn't turn up, invite someone else.

 

[PrincessLeah]

No, youre not being Bridezilla. You've got stuff to organise and deadlines to meet. I would definately recommend enlisting somebody else to deal with the rsvp's and hotel reservations and get them to do all the chasing. People are crap and never reply in time.
As for your uncle, make a decision if he's invited or not. Then let him know. Be firm but polite, explain to him that his OH isn't invited. Let him kick off, close your ears because you dont care anyway, and I wouldnt either. Be prepared for the moaning and then you won't be shocked when he starts. Plus, if he gets all entitled and refuses to come, well he's doing you a favour because you can invite someone else. This is certainly the way I approached things when people were kicking off about my guest list.
Leave your MiL, just write some random stuff on the ladies card and leave it at that. If MiL wants to tell you off about it later, just smile and ignore her too.
HTH xx