My mom is acting weird....NO idea what to do

[LilMama2be]

Has been acting like i've done something terribly wrong lately. I swear she's holding some grudge from things i've done in the past, because she keeps bringing it up as if it were yesterday. =[ it makes me feel like complete shit, I've REALLY changed, I've lost almost ALL of my friends due to me trying to change my ways. All i really have is my boyfriend, and best friend from 7th grade, everyone else wont even talk to me.

My mom has been upset about my brother gambling with her money lately. He's 20 (21 in may) and he lives off of my parents still, they pay his rent, they give him money, they bought everything in his apartment, and he just uses them. She started bitching about it last night how he's been using some poker website gambling her money just about every day. Then she brought me into this, saying how "we've both hurt her and dad so much and we dont realize it" This makes me so frustrated i dont even have words to describe it. I feel like breaking down and CRYING because it hurts me to hear that she doesn't think I'm going to or even trying to change, and i've been trying SO HARD. =[

I don't know if she's taking being upset about my brother out of me, or what. But i know I haven't done anything wrong. She told me we're not celebrating Christmas this year, but i still bought my dad a gift, with ALL the money i had.


She gets like this every once in a while, but lately it hasn't gone away.
Like over thanksgiving she told me that when i tell my boyfriend i'm pregnant (she doesn't want me to tell anyone yet but she doens't know that i've already told him) that she's here for me 100% and she wants my life to be as close to how it would of been without a baby, with the baby, with her help. I told her i wouldn't have her raise my child, and she said you know we would, just for you. or something like that. I dont know but she wanted me to make sure he knew that my parents are there for me and they're going to help me every step of the way..... and now she's all like super bitch and like yelling at me last night. She even said she'd rather die right now than in 20-30 years because there's "nothing to live for anymore"

(and that was right after she checked my brothers debit card account online) again i did NOTHING why am i getting this HUGE guilt trip when i haven't done anything wrong =[

I'm not the same girl anymore
I stay home ALL DAY EVERYDAY..
If i hang out with ANYONE its my boyfriend.
I don't make her do like ANYTHING for me

and she bitches and moans like theres no tomorrow like i've done something terribly wrong.

When i went downstairs this morning she was downthere and i said hi and she let out this huge "*SIGH* ......hi cami.............." and i asked "whats wrong?" and she said "..................nothing.................."






=[ i dont even wanna go downstairs for the rest of the day.

 

[PixieKitty]

Don't take this the wrong way, please!
But is there a chance your mum's manic depressive? It sounds very similar to the behaviour, and you said she gets like this from time to time...
Have a look online at the symptoms etc, see if you recognise anything.
Best of luck xoxox

 

[hypnorm]

It sounds like she is really depressed, may she thinks that she has failed you both on someway.

Its hard when they are like this as my mum can lay the emotional blackmail on quite thick at times and it really makes me feel bad.... and i'm nearly 32, married with a kid!!

 

[LilMama2be]

I have talked to her about it, like in a serious like "i love you" kind of way, about being depressed or anything of the sort, and she denies it, but my friends have seen her like this and they agree with me.

She gets really offended when i try and like talk to her about it, maybe she knows deep inside that she is like that.

She shouldn't get offended though, because I as diagnosed with depression, and she knows that so i should be a good person to talk to.


If i do EVERYTHING she says, she's usually ok about everything, but sometimes she just takes things out on me when she's upset, like I DID something wrong, and I have talked to her about it, and again she gets really upset and I guess she just doesn't see it the way me and my brother do.


I do know she thinks she's failed as a parent (sort of) she knows she gave me and my brother the best childhood we could of had, but she has said "what happened to those kids?" because he's been to rehab for hard drugs, and i've been to a psych ward, and pregnant in the same year. It's been a rough year for our family i guess...


I just hope things brighten up at the end of the tunnel.
I really do love her, and care about her, I just don't think she see's that side of me.

I show it in different ways than most people.

 

[nikky0907]

As you said,it's been a very rough year for you guys and I think your mom should talk to a professional (even if she's not suffering depression) as they can help her cope with everything and come to terms with it.
When she lays guilt on you,maybe in fact she's feeling guilty herself and we all know a mothers guilt is a very strong emotion.

 

[LilMama2be]

She always says like "i gave you the perfect childhood, what happened?"
i'm not sure if she means its not her fault, so what happened to me?
or what did she do wrong later on? and i dont think she means later on

 

[pinkmac85]

Sounds like your mom is definitely dealing with some sort of depression? Maybe she could talk to a professional about it??

 

[ClassicaLover]

 

[mz_jackie86]

Hey i no its hard but people always take things out on those closest to them!
Just tell her u are there for her if she needs to talk and maybe speak to ur brother!
Do somethin with your mum, just u 2! She prob realising that ur gettin on with ur life etc and thats a scary thing for parents!
Try not to worry to much about it! xx

 

[xarlenex]

My mums mentally ill and I have to put up with similar behaviour everyday. Its difficult, but im at the point were I remind myself its the illness and walk away. It's so hard, and thats even with my mum on the correct medication and injections. I hope she starts to feel better soon, or talks to a professional xx