Need Help Dealing with Major baby fever..

[CowgirlBaby]

Alright. I have always wanted to be a mom. I turned 20 this past October. I just finished my final year and culinary school and have basically landed my dream job. It is me and one other cool running the kitchen in a restaurant. My partner and I will be renting our condo as of July. I am suffering from major baby fever. Every time I see a baby or a pregnant woman or a family with children it makes me feel extremely empty and makes me want a baby so bad. It also really doesn't help that I have an almost 1 year old God son. Daemon is cute as a button I love my God son very much. I love watching him over night and taking him places. I was recently shopping for his birthday present and I was looking at baby clothes and then I wandered over to the crib and stoller displays and just seeing the crib displays made me crave having a baby inside. I can't help myself to look at the baby stuff. And my fiance and I have talked about babies and makes and we both want one but he wants to wait. Mostly because he is finishing his last credit for high school as he dropped out in grade 12. So he wants to get a better job first but having talked about names and everything my baby fever is insane.

Any suggestions to help with baby fever?

 

[StarryEyed88]

Hey there �� I had major baby fever when I was your age too. For me I just knew it wasn't the right time or with the right person. Now I am and we are waiting to get married inFeb before trying. I still struggle with seeing other people pregnant. And when scares happen, your hope gets up just a little. I don't really have any advice because I'm still waiting for the feeling to pass and I'll be 28 in October.

Good luck and I hope it happens for you when the time is right ☺️

 

[MindUtopia]

I would just focus on the things you have going on now. Set goals for yourself and projects with particular dates in mind and accomplish them and celebrate your accomplishments. Maybe you want to achieve a certain thing at work? Or your partner wants to finish his education? Plan a trip away to celebrate those things when you've done them so you have something to look forward to. Choose something new you want to learn or do that you haven't done before and wouldn't be able to easily do if you had a baby. Like training for a 5K or learning how to do a new skill, like cake decorating, or take a class in something you've always wanted to learn. Just make yourself busy with things you'd like to do and accomplish before you become parents. Also, schedule special days and weekends away as a couple and plan them and have that to look forward to. Doing all that stuff is really hard or near impossible once you have a child.

I haven't done something for myself really in almost 3.5 years. The most exciting thing I do is I get to go out for dinner (alone!) when I'm away traveling for work. Otherwise, everything is focused on our daughter and we don't have time or money really to enjoy things ourselves. We just had our first night alone together since she was born 3.5 years ago this past weekend. Having children is wonderful. But it means an end to a certain period in your life and you never get those days back. So just make the most of it and enjoy it all to the point that you're sick of having fun and being selfish and you've achieved all the goals you hoped to achieve before you become parents. I didn't have my daughter until I was 31, so it's a bit different. But when I was in my 20s, I was going out with friends, traveling, having weekends away to new places, eating in fun restaurants, joined a running club and ran a half marathon, bought a bike and did a few cycling events and joined a cycling group, took a job overseas for a bit, etc. All of that would be really hard now that we have a daughter and I'm glad we did it then. It meant I didn't feel like I was missing out then because I was having a lot of fun, and I don't feel like I'm missing out now because I feel like I did it all.

Also, get married and enjoy your wedding. I got pregnant about 9 months after we got married and I'm so, so glad that I wasn't (a) pregnant or (b) had a small baby at our wedding. It was a day that was totally about us and it was so fun and we had such a great time on our honeymoon. Being a parent is all-consuming. You literally don't even get to eat a meal in peace to start. We had friends who had their daughter around the time we did and then got married when she was about 18 months old. It was lovely to have her there for the wedding, but they didn't really get to spend much time alone or enjoy their guests because they had to take care of her. My friend missed like a good hour of the reception to go upstairs and feed her. You just don't get to be selfish once you have kids, so do it now and enjoy it.

 

[CowgirlBaby]

I would just focus on the things you have going on now. Set goals for yourself and projects with particular dates in mind and accomplish them and celebrate your accomplishments. Maybe you want to achieve a certain thing at work? Or your partner wants to finish his education? Plan a trip away to celebrate those things when you've done them so you have something to look forward to. Choose something new you want to learn or do that you haven't done before and wouldn't be able to easily do if you had a baby. Like training for a 5K or learning how to do a new skill, like cake decorating, or take a class in something you've always wanted to learn. Just make yourself busy with things you'd like to do and accomplish before you become parents. Also, schedule special days and weekends away as a couple and plan them and have that to look forward to. Doing all that stuff is really hard or near impossible once you have a child.

I haven't done something for myself really in almost 3.5 years. The most exciting thing I do is I get to go out for dinner (alone!) when I'm away traveling for work. Otherwise, everything is focused on our daughter and we don't have time or money really to enjoy things ourselves. We just had our first night alone together since she was born 3.5 years ago this past weekend. Having children is wonderful. But it means an end to a certain period in your life and you never get those days back. So just make the most of it and enjoy it all to the point that you're sick of having fun and being selfish and you've achieved all the goals you hoped to achieve before you become parents. I didn't have my daughter until I was 31, so it's a bit different. But when I was in my 20s, I was going out with friends, traveling, having weekends away to new places, eating in fun restaurants, joined a running club and ran a half marathon, bought a bike and did a few cycling events and joined a cycling group, took a job overseas for a bit, etc. All of that would be really hard now that we have a daughter and I'm glad we did it then. It meant I didn't feel like I was missing out then because I was having a lot of fun, and I don't feel like I'm missing out now because I feel like I did it all.

Also, get married and enjoy your wedding. I got pregnant about 9 months after we got married and I'm so, so glad that I wasn't (a) pregnant or (b) had a small baby at our wedding. It was a day that was totally about us and it was so fun and we had such a great time on our honeymoon. Being a parent is all-consuming. You literally don't even get to eat a meal in peace to start. We had friends who had their daughter around the time we did and then got married when she was about 18 months old. It was lovely to have her there for the wedding, but they didn't really get to spend much time alone or enjoy their guests because they had to take care of her. My friend missed like a good hour of the reception to go upstairs and feed her. You just don't get to be selfish once you have kids, so do it now and enjoy it.

Thanks. I really appreciate the response. I know we at least want to wait till my fiance can finish his schooling in mechanics. Of course get married first, enjoy ourselves that way. I'm unfortunately very different than a lot of people in their 20's. I'm a big introvert. I don't have a lot of friends. My fiance and I sometimes go out for dinner, but I don't go out very often. I kind of like going to my close friends and having drinks with my friends, or even just going for a drive with my friends or my fiance. I like your suggestion of setting goals. I am currently working on getting a new car. My 2000 Nissan Altima, has about reached the end of its life. Lol. I think for now till I get to have my own. I will enjoy my time with my god son Daemon. His first birthday is coming up and I get to make his cake and decorate it and everything as well so I am very excited for that. I'm a baker at heart. If college wasn't so expensive in Canada I would love to continue my education and go back to school at a college 2 hours away from our city that specializes in baking. I would love to learn to quilt. Sadly no one will teach me . But thank you, for helping me see the upside to all this. My biggest problem I think is the baby fever got bad because in the last 2 months 4 people around me have had babies. It's kind of making my body go "Where's mine??"