Need some help :-D

[youngmum2b]

Hii all hope everyones doing alright.

Ok so me n oh have been having the same argument for a couple of weeks now about moving out of his mum n nans into our own place (a family friend of mine rents houses n flats, after talking to him today he said hed just let a 2bed house with garden that we could of had for half the rent:-*), but oh is being picky n damn right fussy cos he dont want to leave his family n move a different area.
So i was hoping some of you girls n guys could help me with pointers as 2 bringing him round to the idea so far i have :
- We wouldnt be stuck in a cramped room
- Our own place
- Noone bitching at us
- Could have a nursery for bubs to go into
- We wouldnt have the 3-4 year wait being on council
- No worry of SS or C.P his of his mum

Can any of you think of any others cos im sick of doing things his familys way which is just wait n see basically, n i wana be settled hopefully before bubs is here.

 

[housewifey]

aw thats a shame u missed out on that place with half the rent! Wish i had somethin like that! How about tempting him with somethin he loves?? hes allowed his xbox in the living room?? Haha. Or. . . Hes allowed a boys night once a month? (I know my OH would love that!) haha

sorry im not much help but hope he comes round! xx

 

[youngmum2b]

aw thats a shame u missed out on that place with half the rent! Wish i had somethin like that! How about tempting him with somethin he loves?? hes allowed his xbox in the living room?? Haha. Or. . . Hes allowed a boys night once a month? (I know my OH would love that!) haha

sorry im not much help but hope he comes round! xx

Tried thimgs like that n he just said he'd be able to play his ps3 in the living room anyway n hed have his night out once a week meaning saturday, when he has football n lil league training

 

[xMissxZoiex]

personally i would tell OH that you refuse to live there anymore and if he doesnt move with you then you will move on your own.. And if he says that you wont be able to afford it on your own tell him that you will because you will have help via benifits (Even if thats not true). Or even tell him that if your not in a new house together by the time you are 35 weeks or something then you are going to go into a mother and baby hostel.

You really need to shock him, if your stress it isnt good for the baby now and it deffintly wont be best for either of you when hes born. Good luck and i hope you find somewere soon.

Sorry i couldnt be more of a help x

 

[youngmum2b]

He wanted me to go into a mother n baby unit so we could stay up here so that aint guna make a difference n i'v told him want a plan layed out beore the 22nd or im moving back down to london, he was alright with movin down there till his nan told him if we move down there shes not guna help him/us with anything.

 

[xMissxZoiex]

Do you have family that can help you down in london? x

 

[Sophiiie]

wow.. he's being so incredibly selfish. not sure what to suggest really other than everything you listed, but if those aren't convincing him then I have no idea what would. his nan doesn't sound like she's helping anything at all.. are you relying on her help? or is it just something she wanted to do?

he needs to get his prorities sorted & consider you & the LO x

 

[youngmum2b]

Yea my whole family is down in london lol
@ sophiie, im not relying on anything from any of oh's family, cos atm all there doing is causing problems eg.
- We HAVE to move out of his mums before bubs is born or ss n cp will get involved,n theres no where near enough space to stay at his nans n the waiting list up here is like 3-4 years n being pregnant dont matter to them cos im 18 n not 17.

So for me theres no pull to stay here except for oh being here, hes so used to having his family around him n his nan 2 always bail him out, so her telling him that she wouldnt help with anything made him change his mind which is wh she wanted. 1 way or another she always seems to get her own way. Although she aint keeping me here if i dont wana be here n she knows that, cos she knows full well im only staying up here cos of oh.

 

[youngmum2b]

Yea my whole family is down in london lol
@ sophiie, im not relying on anything from any of oh's family, cos atm all there doing is causing problems eg.
- We HAVE to move out of his mums before bubs is born or ss n cp will get involved,n theres no where near enough space to stay at his nans n the waiting list up here is like 3-4 years n being pregnant dont matter to them cos im 18 n not 17.

So for me theres no pull to stay here except for oh being here, hes so used to having his family around him n his nan 2 always bail him out, so her telling him that she wouldnt help with anything made him change his mind which is wh she wanted. 1 way or another she always seems to get her own way. Although she aint keeping me here if i dont wana be here n she knows that, cos she knows full well im only staying up here cos of oh.

 

[xMissxZoiex]

He is being so selfish!, He need to grow up like you have done and take responsiblity for you and LO who are his new family! xxxx