Neighbour complaining about toddler being loud

[Lunabelle]

so I am a stay at home mum with a two year old toddler. We have a neighbour who lives a completely different lifestyle from us, she is a little bit older, has never had children and like to entertrain and have parties. Sometimes they are dancing and partying untill 5am right above our bedroom. She came once after her party and apologised for the noise and we said we did hear it, but we understand that's what it's like living in a flat. We know our child makes noise too so we didn't make a fuss about it. Now I think we were too friendly as she is complaining to us about the noise from our flat.

Yes we have a toddler who likes to scream (for fun) and she can be very loud. She loves doing this high pitch scream, I don't know why. Then she moves on. I go out with her to a toddler group mon, tues, thu and fr morning during the week which lasts till 12, then she eats and has a nap till 14. Then we go out whatever the wheather. She's always asleep by 21. So we are really not around that much. She also sleeps through the night, but might wake up occasionally if she's ill etc but we always attend to her immediately.

She also complained about doors banging so I have been really careful about that, sometimes they do get shut by wind.

Apparently she had complained to the landlord too but he hasn't said anything to us. He just said that she wanted our flat too, but he chose us for it. Luckily he has four children so he knows what it's like.

I think we have pretty thin walls as I can hear her walking and opening doors, the front door is constantly banging with her guests going in and out. The noise doesn't bother us because we accept it, but yes I have no doubt she can hear noise from us and she will continue to hear noise. It's inevitable. I get really annoyed about the neighbour complaining. My husband gets really stressed out by it because its rented by his work so he wants to maintain a good image.

I think she is jealous to us, because she wants our flat. All of these complaints started after we got a jaccuzzi outside. I can often see her looking at us playing in the garden. I am wondering how I should deal with a woman like that. I don't want to worry about every little noise at the house. How much toddler noise is unacceptable? We want to start trying for a second one so I can't imagine what she would be like with a baby screaming in the house. Anyone else here had complaints about their noisy babies or toddlers?

 

[OnErth&InHvn]

I've had people say our dogs are too loud and I tried to quiet them but sometimes you cant. That's one reason (of many) we will never have an apartment again.

 

[Babybump87]

Oh is she taking the piss ... it’s called normal family life !

Long as your making efforts to stop un necessary noise , doors banging etc I wouldn’t worry too much ! She sounds like a right one !

 

[DobbyForever]

You’re a better human than me. I would passive aggressive or straight aggressive the s* out if her. I’m sorry you have to put up with that, kids are noisey. You live in a flat. It’s not like your kid is keeping her up nights. I have neighbors on both sides and I don’t complain when his grandkids run up and down the stairs at 11pm during the summer or my other has 90s karaoke every Thursday from 6-9. It’s living noise. Get over it.

I’d probably just tell the neighbor I’ll be sure to pass the message along to my two year old and any future complaints can be directed to his teddy bear. If it kept going I’d keep a log of their after quiet hours activity and pull the two can play that game

BUT I’m a B* and had my last neighbor evicted so idk. I’m just too old for dumb people

 

[Bevziibubble]

Your neighbour is being unreasonable. Toddlers can't help making noise, she was one once. I would rather a noisy toddler than music and parties causing a disruption

 

[LynAnne]

We had a nightmare neighbour who lived below us and would shout and bang on her ceiling(our floor) DS1 for pretty much anything. It started when he began crawling at 7 months old and continued until we sold our flat when he was almost 2.5 years old. She would even shout at him, by name, to "shut up" when all he was doing was playing/walking about etc. like toddlers do. I even remember her shouting at my newborn for crying, during the day I might add. She made me feel awful and anxious for literally years.

The truth is toddlers and babies are noisy but so long as you are being a good parent and not allowing them to scream and cry for hours on end then the noise is reasonable. We've all had neighbours that we can hear and, sure, that can be annoying. We used to have a couple of kids who lived upstairs from us before we had our own who would wake us up at the weekend running about but we didn't complain. It's just what kids do. Living in a flat you have to expect hearing others noise.

She's the one being unreasonable. Not the noise from your toddler!

 

[_Meep_]

She's being a jealous knob. Hate to imagine what my neighbours think of me! My 5 year old deliberately hit my 2 year old in the face with a torch yesterday evening and split her lip - not sure who screamed the loudest: the baby, me (I hit the roof) or my older daughter who burst into hysterics at being yelled at ...

 

[2have4kids]

I’m a landlord with a 3 level split rental. There’s usually a governing ‘Landlords Tenants Act’ and while ours states that renters are entitled to the respectful enjoyment of their property, there are regulations on making noise past 11pm till 8am. She would have contravened our act, your family has not. I’d definitely keep track and note her parties disruptions, time & date and thdn I’d take a quick lookinline for your lical governing act and identify what the regulations are. This should help you handle the stress of feeling like your little girl is a problem.
As a parent I have three toddlers who like to scream and I do parent it - my ears are bleeding, please be quiet -and if they don’t listen I take priveledges away ie I’ll send them to their rooms if they scream or yell at the dinner table. Or I’ll take them for a run around the block if they’re being too rowdy leading up to bedtime. But as a father of 4, I hope your landlord recognises it’s she who’s a bad fit for the property, not you. People who have such low tolerance for others need to get single family dwellings.

 

[adrie]

She is in the wrong. The audacity to complain about kid noise during acceptable hours while she throws parties at 5am! Give me a break. She is totally out of line and I would say as much. There are noise bylaws here, she would be grossly overstepping boundaries as far as I'm concerned. Wow!

That's what happens when you live among other people There needs to be a little "live and let live" within these circumstances. I'm having a bit of a similar circumstance currently. I should post about it.

 

[Katherinep]

Good thing your landlord is understanding...