New to Actively TTC

[Farmgirlalee]

My SO and I decided to stop preventing this summer when there was a SNAFU with my birth control pills and the doctor forgot to call in a my refill. We decided to go with the "if it happens, it happens" idea. And then it didn't and didn't and didn't. My first born child is my daughter who will turn 10 in March. I had her at 24 after two early miscarriages. My ex husband and I did not have the greatest sex life so preventing wasn't really an issue. Now I am with my SO who is amazing and I am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him and we both really would like to add to our family. His son turns 10 in just a few weeks so we basically have two the same age and would like to have at least two of our own together close in age.

So its been five months of trying but not thinking about it much. I've somewhat been keeping an eye on when my phone says should be fertile days but again I haven't been doing any temping, or ovulation monitoring or anything like that. In fact I really don't know much about it. So since I just got AF yesterday I am going to start monitoring my self a bit closer and trying to learn as much as I can.

My daughter was a surprise and wasn't planned, I guess I was hoping that this time around it would just happen. If we miss again this cycle I am going in to get my hormones checked. My sister who is 3 years older than me is infertile, but my oldest sister is having her 4th child at 43 and just had one not quite two years go after a 14 year gap, so it's hard to get a read on what my potential fertility might be just from family history.

Another factor is that my SO has ADHD and is on adderall. I have read that can affect sperm count and he recreationally drinks which I have heard can affect sperm count as well. If I check out okay in the fertility department we are going to have to see if he can be weaned off his medications for a time.

I guess I am feeling discouraged especially since I was a week late for this period and had gotten my hopes up. I am rarely late by more than a day or two so I am wondering if I perhaps had a really really really early miscarriage, just early enough to delay the period, but not enough pregnant to show on the test I took. IDK.

Sorry for rambling for so long. I don't even want to tell friends or family that we are trying. It just seems to hard to see their expectant faces all the time and have to say "No not yet".

 

[QueenMom]

So first if you are curious about his sperm mobility they have a sperm check kit at walgreens where the pregnancy and family planning stuff is. SO that is an option that doesn't need to embarrass him if he is one of those kinda guys.
And also, people drink I wouldn't worry about that is he isn't a heavy drinker.
Honestly the best advise I can give you is to just do the deed every other day You can't miss the egg that way. You can also try OPKs. I find that I like the wondfos the best for OPKS. I don't like their pregnancy tests, the evaps are heart breaking. They also have digital opks that make super easy to read. OPKs are the best way to catch a surge in LH because you will ovulate 12-48 hours after your first positive OPK.
The sperm meets egg theory which is recommended to couples who are having trouble getting pregnant is pretty much: you do the deed every other day AND use OPKs. When you get a positive you are supposed to dtd every day starting that day for 3 days, then take a break for 1 day and dtd one more time for good measure. Also there is lubricant called preseed and that is supposed to work really well. The idea is to make the environment in the vagina ideal for the sperm to make it to their destination.
That's all the tips I have for now. If you get really crazy with it, it can be stressful. If it was me I would just start the first month of real trying by dtd every other day and go from there with adding different things. Oh and checking his sperm just in case the meds are effecting him. Google can be cruel so you may have nothing to worry about with meds anyways. GL

 

[Farmgirlalee]

Thanks. He and I talked about it yesterday and he looked up a supplement for us both to take and we looked up the sperm checker. We live in a small town that doesn't always carry the newest items like that. Anyway we are going to try one more month before we start buying tests and supplements and sending me to the doctor. My fertile days are in about a week and a half so hopefully we get it this time around

 

[Farmgirlalee]

I feel like this month is both flying by and dragging. I bought ovulation pee sticks today and tested but no luck yet. I am dying. My SO wants a baby so bad and I do too. I want to enjoy being pregnant. My first pregnancy was awful. My ex cheated on me the whole time, I was so sick and he treated me like crap if I asked him to go get something from the store. I love my daughter so much and everything I went through is worth it to have her. I know having a baby with my SO will be so much different, he is an amazing man. He asked me to marry him the other night but doesn't want to make it official until he gets a ring. I just want us to have that wonderful moment when we see the test come back positive. Even as I type this I am getting light cramping and I am so hopeful that I will ovulate soon. Somebody stop me from obsessing!!