woadie
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Aug 30, 2009
- Messages
- 115
- Reaction score
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Hi all,
I started reading your forum a couple of weeks ago just after I discovered I was pregnant, and at a time when all my problems began. The pregnancy was unplanned and came as quite a shock, but my BF of 6+ months was actually really supportive at the time and even said he was secretly quite pleased, this gave him a reason to be at last, and that we would be a family.... and he made plans that weekend over our future. We are neither so young, I'm in my mid 30's and he is 40, neither of us have any children nor ever married. So the following Thursday came as quite a shock when, after a few days of support after our weekend and his return home (he lives a way away)... he emailed me to say he didn't love me enough to want to make our relationship work, that he had been desperately unhappy with me (that was news), and that he wished me luck with my 'decision'. He said if I decided 'to go full term' and 'if and when it was born', I had his address to contact the CSA as he wouldn't 'run from that responsibility'. I don't need to tell you how sick I felt inside. I even considered a termination but in my heart I just cannot do it. But the past two weeks have been a turmoil, and I had a particulalry rough night last night as my emotions are frayed to say the least.
I also don't understand any of his later reaction, which ended with 'This will be my last communication with you as there isnt any point of more, i wish you the best with whatever decision you make.' I cannot believe any single man of that age wouldn't even want to have any dealings with his own child.
I do know from reading the posts on here that what has happened to me is far from unique and I know you are all a welath of information and support over times like this, which is why I finally plucked up the courage to join and post.
I don't know how ever I am going to cope with having this little one without a partner. I never wanted for my child to end up without a Daddy. It breaks my heart to know how I feel about the man who has done this, and how only two weeks before, he loved me.
Just so you kind of understand my situation... My ex died in a car crash just over two years ago, so meeting someone else and actually feeling love for them was a milestone in itself, not something I ever thought would happen again after my loss. Both my parents are also dead and I have zero family... It's just me, and the developing bump now. I do have a good job, but I am used to the single life... and I know that childcare is going to eat up my salary.
What more can I say... other than the usual... WHY ME?!!!
Rather than the 'enjoyment' of the next 7 months... life iwll be an emotional struggle
so I look forward to hopefully finding a few friends on here to offer advice and share each hurdle with 
Thanks for reading
I started reading your forum a couple of weeks ago just after I discovered I was pregnant, and at a time when all my problems began. The pregnancy was unplanned and came as quite a shock, but my BF of 6+ months was actually really supportive at the time and even said he was secretly quite pleased, this gave him a reason to be at last, and that we would be a family.... and he made plans that weekend over our future. We are neither so young, I'm in my mid 30's and he is 40, neither of us have any children nor ever married. So the following Thursday came as quite a shock when, after a few days of support after our weekend and his return home (he lives a way away)... he emailed me to say he didn't love me enough to want to make our relationship work, that he had been desperately unhappy with me (that was news), and that he wished me luck with my 'decision'. He said if I decided 'to go full term' and 'if and when it was born', I had his address to contact the CSA as he wouldn't 'run from that responsibility'. I don't need to tell you how sick I felt inside. I even considered a termination but in my heart I just cannot do it. But the past two weeks have been a turmoil, and I had a particulalry rough night last night as my emotions are frayed to say the least.
I also don't understand any of his later reaction, which ended with 'This will be my last communication with you as there isnt any point of more, i wish you the best with whatever decision you make.' I cannot believe any single man of that age wouldn't even want to have any dealings with his own child.
I do know from reading the posts on here that what has happened to me is far from unique and I know you are all a welath of information and support over times like this, which is why I finally plucked up the courage to join and post.
I don't know how ever I am going to cope with having this little one without a partner. I never wanted for my child to end up without a Daddy. It breaks my heart to know how I feel about the man who has done this, and how only two weeks before, he loved me.
Just so you kind of understand my situation... My ex died in a car crash just over two years ago, so meeting someone else and actually feeling love for them was a milestone in itself, not something I ever thought would happen again after my loss. Both my parents are also dead and I have zero family... It's just me, and the developing bump now. I do have a good job, but I am used to the single life... and I know that childcare is going to eat up my salary.
What more can I say... other than the usual... WHY ME?!!!
Rather than the 'enjoyment' of the next 7 months... life iwll be an emotional struggle
so I look forward to hopefully finding a few friends on here to offer advice and share each hurdle with Thanks for reading
that rough, I don't understand why some men do that, but you are not alone. You have come to the right place, there is tonnes of support on here. There is also a single parenting section which might help. Good luck 
Glad you joined bnb there are plenty of women on here to give support.. Even though I can't personally relate, you are not alone. Coming from a pregnancy that only my mom wanted, I know that despite having to raise this child without their father , YOUR love will be enough.You already sound stronger than you think. 
xxx
