Hi all,
I'm 32, and my husband and I have been trying for 15 months. My blood tests and my husband's tests have all come back normal, and I do ovulate (though my cycles are irregular), so we're in that stage of not knowing what's wrong. I'm on my first month of Clomid right now, and while my period would still be a few days away, I'm feeling it coming on. So unless these are early pregnancy symptoms that are exactly like my usual PMS symptoms, I'm thinking that I'm not pregnant.
We'll keep this up for the usual 4-6 months and hope for the best, but I'm starting to indulge the "what if it doesn't work" voices in my head and look into the next steps. The next steps for me would be an HSG and then other interventions based on those results. However, I don't think I have it in me to go much further with tests and treatments... it seems like after the Clomid, it all gets so much more invasive/expensive/risky. I can't stand the idea of going through the roller-coaster of infertility treatments and still potentially ending up where I am now (but poorer and more emotionally drained). I've never been good at handling risk.
I think, instead, I'd go the adoption route. I've always wanted to adopt after raising biological kids. Of course, that carries a whole other set of questions and stresses. There are the obvious risks associated with finding a child and going through the process to finalize an adoption. Then there's the fact that although my husband wants kids as much as I do, he would also love another few years to focus on things other than kids. He agreed to start TTC because of my age, but if we adopt, he'd rather wait a bit. (I'd want to have a kid in our house, like, yesterday.) And then there's the fact that we may be moving states sometime within the next couple of years. I'd really want to adopt a child from foster care, and the whole certification process would get trickier if we move states in the middle of it.
Yeah, I realize I'm several steps ahead of where I need to be, and I should be focusing on the promise that the Clomid will work, as it has for so many women. But my mind is going other places, and hopefully sharing it with you all will calm it down a bit!
Thanks for reading! I'm looking forward to having a supportive community to share this experience with!
-Amy
I'm 32, and my husband and I have been trying for 15 months. My blood tests and my husband's tests have all come back normal, and I do ovulate (though my cycles are irregular), so we're in that stage of not knowing what's wrong. I'm on my first month of Clomid right now, and while my period would still be a few days away, I'm feeling it coming on. So unless these are early pregnancy symptoms that are exactly like my usual PMS symptoms, I'm thinking that I'm not pregnant.
We'll keep this up for the usual 4-6 months and hope for the best, but I'm starting to indulge the "what if it doesn't work" voices in my head and look into the next steps. The next steps for me would be an HSG and then other interventions based on those results. However, I don't think I have it in me to go much further with tests and treatments... it seems like after the Clomid, it all gets so much more invasive/expensive/risky. I can't stand the idea of going through the roller-coaster of infertility treatments and still potentially ending up where I am now (but poorer and more emotionally drained). I've never been good at handling risk.
I think, instead, I'd go the adoption route. I've always wanted to adopt after raising biological kids. Of course, that carries a whole other set of questions and stresses. There are the obvious risks associated with finding a child and going through the process to finalize an adoption. Then there's the fact that although my husband wants kids as much as I do, he would also love another few years to focus on things other than kids. He agreed to start TTC because of my age, but if we adopt, he'd rather wait a bit. (I'd want to have a kid in our house, like, yesterday.) And then there's the fact that we may be moving states sometime within the next couple of years. I'd really want to adopt a child from foster care, and the whole certification process would get trickier if we move states in the middle of it.
Yeah, I realize I'm several steps ahead of where I need to be, and I should be focusing on the promise that the Clomid will work, as it has for so many women. But my mind is going other places, and hopefully sharing it with you all will calm it down a bit!
Thanks for reading! I'm looking forward to having a supportive community to share this experience with!
-Amy
