Newbie w/Second Trimester Loss

[Mommy's Angel]

Hi everyone!

we're actually trying to conceive after giving birth to our first son Jackson Jeffrey at 22wks gestation.

There are several factors...someone in who's car we were riding put the breaks on suddenly on a state to state trip and I lost my mucus plug an hour later. Shortly after, I was looked at but the nurse practitioner at the perinatal center said everything was alright. Had she looked closer and listened she would have SEEN the mucus plug was gone and the Dr. could have had time to put a suppository in and cerclaged the cervix.

I was found 3cm dialated a month later and they gave me two options. Stay in the hospital with my legs up (they couldn't do anything until the morning) or go home. We chose home because the staff gave us no hope and would do nothing.

He was born, we held him and let him go.

I'm in here because as we ttc I'm so caught up with guilt, frustration and even though we're trying again for a pregnancy...I miss my Jackson.

I am 36 y/o and was told we'd NEVER conceive and Jackson was our delightful miraculous surprise without fertility treatment of any kind.

We have decided to try again using fertility drugs and My last Clomid pill was today. I have sonograms scheduled for Friday and Monday so far and I "could" possibly have an IUI this weekend sometime.

Bitter sweet of it all is my birthday is May 9th. It happens to fall on mothers day. It would be really nice to conceive a child on Mothers day knowing the sadness we've been through. We haven't even put his stone down yet.

I would REALLY appreciate some input from those who've been through this. I am on edge and scared. I REALLY want another child and praying God would provide. Please give me some tips on what you did to find JOY in the process again.

I'm told I'll be on progesterone in oil upon conception then shortly after I'll be cerclaged and I'm guessing on full bed rest. Has anyone else been through this? What are you going through? How should I prepare?

Thank You for your time.


Rebekah

 

[readynwilling]

No advice sorry but

 

[hekate]

Hello hun! I am so very sorry for your loss of Jackson! I too lost my little boy at about 24 weeks of pregnancy....
I have found comfort in the support the ladies in the Stillbirth/neo-natal loss section have given me and each other....there is a pregnancy after loss thread in there as well as a trying to conceive one.....come over and have a look around....
https://www.babyandbump.com/stillbirths-neonatal-loss-sids/

 

[summer rain]

Hi

my brother in law and his wife lost a baby at 26 weeks; she was born alive but was small for that stage and only lived for 48 hours its so hard; I dearly hope you can conceive again xx

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Hekate, I'm so sorry to hear about Indigo. ((hugs)) I will check out the link and look forward to getting to know everyone. Thank you everyone for the comments.

 

[halas]

im sorry for your loss i cant imagine how it would feel for you but welcome and i hope you get a bfp very soon and heres some baby dust for good luck

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Thank You very much for your kind and encouraging words!

 

[catfromaus]

I really hope you get your bfp quickly, and in the meantime find the support you need. Nothing will ever replace Jackson, but I really hope that you don't have to wait too long to be pregnant again.

xxxx xxxx

 

[kaleidoscope]

Im so sorry to hear of your loss..I hope you get your BFP soon

 

[millwallrose4]

I haven't been through a late loss so can't imagine how painful it is and how much you miss him, but I just wanted to wish you so much luck trying to conceive again. Fingers crossed you get that BFP soon.

 

[rainbows_x]

I am so sorry to hear about your loss.

I really hope you can get your BFP soon x

 

[mimmymoo]

so sorry for your loss, i hope you get your bfp real soon ..

i hope my story encourages you ..

i lost a dd at 20 weeks almost two yrs ago now, she just stopped moving. i went for a check up and they couldnt pick up her heartbeat . they dont know why she died - just said it was one of those things
as devastating as it was we realised time wasnt on our side (as in our late 30's) so as soon as we were told it was ok to ttc - we tried again, i had a chemical pregnancy 2 months later, then nothing for over a year .. it was devestating, month after month finding that we hadnt been successfull . we then embarked on fertility testing, relaxed (ie. bdedd probably 2-3 times) and i found out i was pg before we got the results back .. unfortunately we lost that pg at 8 weeks and i was by then 40 and decided .. hey, we have a beautiful daughter (now 11) lets be thankful for what we have, just couldnt face going through all the heartache of ttc and 2ww again .. so decided to give up, went on the pill, literally bedded once from what i can remember and low and behold i found out i was pregnant 2 months after last mc .. i now 21+5 pg with a ds, its been tough, anxiety and worry are through the roof but we're hanging in there .. hoping this little miracle baby will be with us safelly in sept

im not out of the woods yet, but what im trying to say is there is hope no matter what your age or previous experiences of pregancy have been, wishing yu lots of luck and baby dust xx

 

[Mommy's Angel]

so sorry for your loss, i hope you get your bfp real soon ..

i hope my story encourages you ..

i lost a dd at 20 weeks almost two yrs ago now, she just stopped moving. i went for a check up and they couldnt pick up her heartbeat . they dont know why she died - just said it was one of those things
as devastating as it was we realised time wasnt on our side (as in our late 30's) so as soon as we were told it was ok to ttc - we tried again, i had a chemical pregnancy 2 months later, then nothing for over a year .. it was devestating, month after month finding that we hadnt been successfull . we then embarked on fertility testing, relaxed (ie. bdedd probably 2-3 times) and i found out i was pg before we got the results back .. unfortunately we lost that pg at 8 weeks and i was by then 40 and decided .. hey, we have a beautiful daughter (now 11) lets be thankful for what we have, just couldnt face going through all the heartache of ttc and 2ww again .. so decided to give up, went on the pill, literally bedded once from what i can remember and low and behold i found out i was pregnant 2 months after last mc .. i now 21+5 pg with a ds, its been tough, anxiety and worry are through the roof but we're hanging in there .. hoping this little miracle baby will be with us safelly in sept

im not out of the woods yet, but what im trying to say is there is hope no matter what your age or previous experiences of pregancy have been, wishing yu lots of luck and baby dust xx

Thank You for sharing such an intimate story of what you went through. Your story has given me such hope. I just turned 36 and this industry puts those of us 35 or older in higher risk categories and we're made to feel old. I was left wondering how long we actually have to try with our age and sharing your struggles and triumphs has given me such a peace.

Right now we're trying the fertility route and have decided when we'll stop in the process if it comes to it. My first cycle on a low dose of Clomid doesn't seem to be working, though I do have follies which is a plus. The nurse doesn't think it will be enough to try this time around. We're prayerfully trusting that God knows best in timing.

I just wanted to thank you and everyone else for sharing your sweet comments. Thank You!

Rebekah