No longer trying in may

[Alchemist]

well, its pretty crappy. went from soooo happy to devestated in one night.

my husband is totally not where i thought he would be and it pretty much became clear this weekend. looks like we wont be trying in may...and as it seems we wont be pretty much ever.... this is like the second time i was preparing to come off meds and hes not keen to try becuase of our relationship.

i have come to realise that it may never happen so i guess there are two options for me, suck it up or leave............

i just dont get why he wont grow up........

pretty devestated................

 

[Arcanegirl]

What about the relationship is he having doubts about?

It sounds like hes maybe not completley commited?
I think a good talk is in order, whilst you need to respect his wishes he also needs to respect yours.

 

[toffee87]

Awwww, how old are you and him?

It's a huge committment having a baby, and often men take that little bit longer xxx

 

[honeybunch2k7]

I'm sorry! I'm sure the time for baby will come.

 

[Alchemist]

What about the relationship is he having doubts about?

It sounds like hes maybe not completley commited?
I think a good talk is in order, whilst you need to respect his wishes he also needs to respect yours.

I agree totally. thats is why i am putting my foot down. my OH has always had problems making decisions - you cant believe how long it took to get married but i am older and wiser now and am not letting him fence sit any longer.

it affects me. he claims he wants to be on the same team but in his language it means he wants me to give him all he needs before he can feel comfortable letting go of alpha position....... he is honesly scared of being moved aside!!!! i think it has routes in his upbringing. but if i let my upbringing hold me back i would be a drgged up prostitute ha ha just to piss my mom off ......

i actually am glad this is happening as may would have come. i would be weaned off my meds and have a complete breakdown. i did the wise thing by bringing it up to test the waters (of course he accused me of manipulating him to which i responded that it would be manipulating if i didnt tell you what i was doing and why - HIS ISSUE!!!!)

i really thought he was better (after all hes been in therapy for a year now - honestly what has he been doing in therapy???? he doenst seem to trust me or himself any more???)

oh well, i am going to see what transpires with this.....but i am not allowing him to fence sit when i have needs too. so wish me luck

 

[Rumpskin]

You go girl. It is amazing what a bit of stubborness can do to a man. You take control of your life and get what you want and deserve xxx

 

[toffee87]

alchemist, what meds are you on?

 

[Alchemist]

I am on cipralex and am currently taking 5mg (weaning off). I am going to stay on this dose for a few weeks longer than anticipated to deal with whats going on....which i have posted in a new section