Normal or should I be concerned?

[ellismum]

Well if we're any of my children I would be doing it myself, going for custody, not calling in social services and passing the buck

How is it passing the buck? Do you know how long it can take to get to a custody hearing? My sister and her DH have been waiting for nearly 2 years regarding his DD. I won't go into to much on a public forum as its not my business to spill but in the meantime I strongly believe that until he is away from his mother someone else needs to at least be made aware of the situation!

 

[suzib76]

Well if we're any of my children I would be doing it myself, going for custody, not calling in social services and passing the buck

How is it passing the buck? Do you know how long it can take to get to a custody hearing? My sister and her DH have been waiting for nearly 2 years regarding his DD. I won't go into to much on a public forum as its not my business to spill but in the meantime I strongly believe that until he is away from his mother someone else needs to at least be made aware of the situation!

Wrong choice of words maybe. What I ment was if it were one of my own children I would doing something myself. I would never consider calling social services on my own child whilst doing nothing myself

It doesn't have to be custody hearing or social services. It's not an either all, dad is still able to try and do something meantime.

 

[Eternal]

To be honest it more his family issues than the knifes I'd be concerned with, he pounds like he is prepping rather than anything aggressive. Not that I agree with having knifes about, but that's where the parent comes in.

I guess I depends a lot on you as the step mum, do YOU want custody? If so then the case for custody sounds strong, I'd speak to a solicitor next and get advise, he would give advise on ss or police action.

How does the boy feel? He sounds scared and confused!

 

[Maggs]

To be honest it more his family issues than the knifes I'd be concerned with, he pounds like he is prepping rather than anything aggressive. Not that I agree with having knifes about, but that's where the parent comes in.

I guess I depends a lot on you as the step mum, do YOU want custody? If so then the case for custody sounds strong, I'd speak to a solicitor next and get advise, he would give advise on ss or police action.

How does the boy feel? He sounds scared and confused!

Yes I'm very concerned about this interest in violence!

DH and I spoke about it last night briefly. It's not even been 2 weeks and he's quite good at bottling up things and shutting down. (typical man!) I think we're hoping things will change as going for a custody would be a last resort. His Mom means well but does these things out of guilt. We would hate to take him from her. The option is him living here without having custody but we'd have to completely change our life roundabout to suit him. Just some of the concerns...

I work shift work, DH works long days. Where would he go after school? LO goes to a babysitter, we can't afford to send 2 there.

If I stayed home and just worked weekends, we need child support from her cause we couldn't afford to do this way.

His school is in a different town, if he stayed here, it's be a long commute twice a day to get him to school. Other option is enrolling him in the school here but that's a massive uproot for him away from his friends. First year at high school this year.

Having him in the house IF he's leading down that negative road as I have a one year old and he's my priority. I do not want him around that influence.

And the hardest for me personally...this would put a massive hitch in our plans to move back to Canada in a few years time. My parents are getting older, LO is their only grandchild. If we stay here for the long term, something may happen and they never get the wonderful opportunity to spend with their grandchild(ren).