OH threatened to get snip

[dan-o]

Yesterday my OH said, if we go through another MC like this again, he will get the snip.

Neither of us have any children yet & he was very happy when I fell pg.

During the MC I've only broken down in his presence a few times & remained positive most days.

For once, I'm lost for words.

 

[samzi]

just wanted to give you

 

[mom-on-8/2009]

poor guy must be really upset about the mc
big hugs for both of you!

 

[MrsO29]

I have said on another thread that if this one doesn't work for us, we will not be trying again.
This is more my hubbys decision then mine though.
He says he can't stand to see me go through this, the trying, testing every month, happiness when pg, devestation and pain when m/c.
I am the same as you, staying strong in front of everyone else.
I never even cried in front of anyone.
I think they can still tell how much pain we are in.

Unfortunately, I think we as women feel the desire to have a baby so strongly, we will put ourselves through anything in order to get one. I don't think they can understand it as they don't feel the urge like we do.

Perhaps you can talk to him and try to make him understand.
Show him these boards!

 

[Mystified]

My husband said one more try too. Make me wonder if i do ever get pg again if i even tell him until i have had a scan......... Men.

 

[rachjim98]

I think we need to look at it from their point of view. They have to watch the women they love suffer the most painful experience out there THE LOSS OF A CHILD. As well as feel the pain too.
My poor DH is still wondering what to do with me.. poor guy! He is wonderful but sometimes I am sure he wants to call the white coats (insaine hospital) on me. Just take it one step at a time. This time is your time Dan-o dont even think the other way..

 

[pennypoptart]

oh hun... tell him that getting the snip is really painful! that'll put him off. men hate pain. you and I both know that he doesn't mean it! And you won't ever go through it again, not now that you have a bucket full of PMA from me!!!

 

[RobenR]

My DH seriously reconsidered briefly when told that if we didn't have the procedure to take our baby out, a proper natural miscarriage could induce a heart attack or death. He spent a few days reconsidering the risks to me and not wanting children ever before myself and a padre talked sense into him.

so sorry you two are going through this.

He just needs some time to get over it, he might also be upset over seeing you upset and if he knows you well, then he knows that you aren't saying or showing in his presence.

As suggested earlier, show him these boards, it might help him.

 

[obe]

He obviously loves you very much and it hurts to see you go through all this. Im sure hes just saying it out of frustration and wouldnt go through with it. My partner had the snip before we met and regrets it so much!! Lots of luck!

 

[Csunshine013]

dan-o,
I am just as lost as you. My dh told me there wouldn't be anymore. I got so angry, but we were discussing other emotional things when he said this so I waited until we could talk rationally and he didn't mean what he had said. Men are so frustrating when it comes to emotions. Mine doesn't show any. I guess half the time. I cry and call my mom a lot. She is my rock! I am here if you need to talk. I know there are things I express here that I can't even start to express to DH.

Here's to you and yours having one stick!

 

[AP]

Dan-O
My OH said he didnt want to try. i wanted to kick his head in.
Then he got upset when i said i didnt want to try. i was very bitter after the 2nd mc and hissed that this just wasnt for me.

Its totally just his way of dealing with things - lets face it does he really want to go through that!!!!!!!!!